๐•‚๐•’๐•ฅ๐•–๐•๐•ช๐•Ÿ_๐•„๐• ๐•”๐•™๐•š ๐Ÿ’œ

โœจ๐Ÿ’œ ๐“๐“ต๐“ฒ๐“ฌ๐“ฎ | ๐“ก๐“ช๐“ฎ | ๐“š๐“ช๐“ฒ๐“ป๐“ช | ๐“ฉ๐“ฒ๐“ป๐“ผ๐“ฑ โœจ๐Ÿ’œ

๐™ธ'๐š– ๐™บ๐šŠ๐š๐šŽ๐š•๐šข๐š—, ๐Ÿท๐Ÿบ, ๐™ธ๐™ฝ๐™ต๐™ฟ-๐šƒ, ๐šŠ๐š— ๐™ฐ๐š๐™ผ๐šˆ ๐šŒ๐š›๐šŠ๐šฃ๐š’๐š•๐šข ๐š’๐š— ๐š•๐š˜๐šŸ๐šŽ ๐š ๐š’๐š๐š‘ ๐™ฟ๐šŠ๐š›๐š” ๐™น๐š’๐š–๐š’๐š—, โ™, ๐™ธ ๐š•๐š˜๐šŸ๐šŽ ๐š ๐š›๐š’๐š๐š’๐š—๐š๐Ÿ“, ๐š๐šŠ๐š—๐šŒ๐š’๐š—๐š๐Ÿ’ƒ, ๐š๐š›๐šŠ๐š™๐š‘๐š’๐šŒ ๐š๐šŽ๐šœ๐š’๐š๐š—๐š’๐š—๐šโœจ, ๐šŠ๐šŒ๐š๐š’๐š—๐š๐ŸŽญ, ๐š–๐šž๐šœ๐š’๐šŒ๐ŸŽถ, ๐šŠ๐š—๐š ๐š™๐š‘๐š˜๐š๐š˜๐š๐š›๐šŠ๐š™๐š‘๐šข๐Ÿ“ท ๐™ป๐šŽ๐š'๐šœ ๐š‹๐šŽ ๐š๐š›๐š’๐šŽ๐š—๐š๐šœ๐Ÿคž ๐™ฑ๐š˜๐š›๐šŠ๐š‘๐šŠ๐šŽ๐Ÿ’œ

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Interesting!!

I really loved the plot, and the characters, not to mention how diverse it is! I love her confidence and her personality, I would love to be friends with her!

You struggle a bit with your grammar and writing style, but that can be fixed easily.

Overall, I love the book, and will always be waiting for new chapters!

Keep it up and never stop writing xx ๐Ÿ’œ๐Ÿ’œ๐Ÿ’œ

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Captivating!

I really love this ff so far! This is my first Yoongi fanfic, and I was quite skeptical at first, but now I'm probably addicted! I really love Jiwoo's character, she isn't the typical shy girl I usually see. I love the plot of the whole story, and I'm eagerly waiting for more! Never stop writing๐Ÿคฉ

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Wow. Just wow.

I absoutelt love it! Paranormality and ghost stories are usually at the deep end of my genre preferences, but you might've got me hooked on this! I love your writing style and vocabulary you use. Can't wait for the next chapter! ๐Ÿ˜‰

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Very nice!

I think these poems are really nice...they convey a lot of emotion too, some really hit home, loved them!

Keep writing, and never give up!! xx

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Loved it!

I thought it was a really nice book, and I love the characters! I'm not a big fan of the genre, but this story was really interesting! The development of the characters was nice, we got to know each of their unique personality, and I love how three dimensional all of them are. The storyline was a bit confusing for me at first because again, I'm not a fan of fantasy, so I don't read books about these plots but when I understood, I was hooked!

Keep writing and never give up! xx

๐Ÿ’œ

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Amazing!!

I really love this story!!! I love the plot, and even though there are only three chapters, I am literally addicted to this story! Only a few errors here and there, but other than that, it's a perfect fanfiction! I am so eager for the next chapters ๐Ÿ’œ

Never give up writing and shoot for the stars xx โœจ

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Really intense!

I really found this quite intense, and I loved how the strong character is a female. The first two chapters were a bit confusing, and I feel like there were too many characters introduced at once. Few grammar errors here and there, but no one is perfect, right? I'm sure you will improve.

All though these type of stories aren't exactly my cup of tea, I found the plot quite alluring. Waiting for more!

Never give up xx

๐Ÿ’œ๐Ÿ’œ

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Great Start!!

I really enjoyed reading so far, intriguing prologue! I feel like my advice to you would be to build the character's personality and characteristics more, I get the feeling that Avery and Hanna are quite different, so show that contrast using words.

I'm excited to see where this story is going, and I know it will turn out great!

Never stop writing xx

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Love it!

This fanfic is really good! Even though I'm really into mafia-themed fanfics, I loved this one!

I know English is not your first language, so grammar mistakes will be there, but there is always room for improvement!

The only minor flaws are that you might want to check your work before submitting it, that way you can catch the spelling and capitalizing mistakes.

My advice to you is to download Grammarly, it will help you a lot, even I use it, and I noticed a difference in my writing!

Block out the negativity, shine with positivity, and never give up your writing! Love and support from your friend๐Ÿ’œ๐Ÿ’œ๐Ÿ’œ

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Pretty good story!

Hi Jamie, I read this book, and I actually really loved it! I love the characters and the storyline. You only have very few errors, but practice makes perfect! I read this all in one go because I wanted to know what was gonna happen next! Awesome story, keep writing more, and never give up! ๐Ÿ’•

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Nice

Hey Austin Watson, it was nice reading! I think it could do better though. You need to fix your technical aspects, especially where to capitalize a letter at the beginning of a sentence, and proper nouns. Try sectioning it into paragraphs for the reader to read easily. Also, I think the story moves a bit too fast. You should slowly build the story, so its not too much of a rush. These two chapters could have been elaborated into maybe 7 chapters.

Overall, I think you will definitely improve!

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