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Facile political commentary
The Last Exodus tries to be a lot of things; tacit political commentary, a character driven drama, and an exciting near future dystopian tale. It unfortunately does none of these things remarkably well.
Characters are as dull as the prose, and as dull as the bland descriptions of the worst-case scenario America of tomorrow. They're all one dimensional, and while an earnest effort is made to breath some life into them, there are no character arcs to speak of and there's nothing even remotely resembling an interesting character conflict. Everyone ends up pretty much where they began.
As a whole, it really comes off as an attempt to give thought-provoking political commentary by providing us with a glimpse at an exaggerated future of certain political ideals taken to their extreme. But it's a jumbled mess. The author seems to conflate the ideals of several opposing political ideologies (neo-liberalism, socialism, and even neo-conservatism, which is surprising, considering the author's opinions on certain issues.), and merge them into a society that's the worst of the lot. It makes absolutely no sense, and for a story with its political warnings at its core, that's a dire fault. When it does work, the pro-conservative/libertarian message borders on propaganda. It is neither subtle, nor fair, showing only the author's skewed perception of today's different political climates. It reads like baby's first "1984".
I sound really harsh, though I don't mean to be; The Last Exodus is an earnest effort by an author that, unfortunately, still has a long way to go. Liven up your prose, Trever, and if you're going to write a story with a message make sure you understand what that message is yourself.
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