Terryifying Yet Beautiful
This was frightening and beautiful in equal measure. The narrative was dark and mysterious with an ever-present sadness. The pacing was good; not too slow, not too fast. The ending gave me such a great sense of release. It's just a really good little story. (:
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I'll explain why I gave 4 stars for punctuation and grammar. I normally ignore typos--we all make them, but you did the same thing consistently so I think it might be a habit. You have a tendency to use phrases as sentences. For example, "Not even she knew anymore what they would find. In there."
"In there" is a phrase that shouldn't be by itself. Placing a dash between "find" and "In" would give you the emotional impact you were trying to achieve with the period without leaving a phrase hanging by itself. (:
It's a small issue that's easily corrected. Overall, your writing is very good and easy to understand.