Sydney - you are taking on the Billionaire Bad Boy Trope so make sure you are familiar with it as it has been done many times before. So ask yourself how am I going to make this story unique and original in the world of Romance? Also, heat factor. What heat factor are you going for? 1 is just implied kissing or not even touching at all, it's cute and definitely G rated. Heat factor 2 is PG, kissing is fine, hands on waists, not on bums or butts, passion is there but no actual description of detailed sex. Heat level 3 is getting hot. Kissing, yup, lots of that, hands all over the place, descriptions of how turned on the persons are but not fully graphic. The sex is at least 3 - 4 paragraphs. The writer here has to decide what words to use for the guy's manhood and her sex - also what words do you use for the characters desires?? How turned on are they? What do they want sexually etc ... Heat 4 is getting into Jasinda Wilder territory (if you haven't read her BADD series, I highly recommend them, they are awesome and an excellent guide for how to write sex scenes and incredible stories that you do not want to put down. Her use of vulgar language is appropriate and so hot! Chelle Bliss and Meghan March are another two writers that are fantastic. Heat 4 is what my novel is. My sex scenes are a page or more (no more than 2) I am explicit but not hardcore, appropriate to my characters actions and my use of language is 18+ but again, appropriate for the characters. Heat level 5 is full on erotica. The story is all about sex. Selena Kitt is the on the top of that list, her stories are insane! She owns her own publishing company too. She is smart and brands herself well plus writing sizzling erotica. I like your chapter, it is engaging, I like the first person, sometimes for me the third person can get a bit bogged down. In the end it is what you are comfortable with. First person you can get in the head of your character and his or her actions. I also love the alternative narratives - say like Isabelle - her chapter, then Grey - his chapter (an example). Your description of Isabelle was spot on. The only issue was that he was looking out at the London skyline with his back to her but he does not turn? How does she know what he looks like at the front? Not sure where you are going with the story but I would make his past dark and something he is running from and she unearths this and uses it to change him. Keep writing, it makes us better humans!!
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