Jaeotic

It could be great with more work

I think with some more work this could be a fantastic book, and I can see you have some good ideas.

I'd suggest you go back through your work and review your spelling and grammar as a priority. There are some cases of incorrect spellings (this is usually within colloquial phrases you've used), and you have misused punctuation a few times too. I'd recommend downloading grammarly - the free version is great and even works on the inkitt writing page!

As for your writing style, I'd try to avoid using established phrases so much. You tend to throw them into your writing when sometimes they're only loosely related to what you're talking about. If you swapped some of these phrases for your own descriptions and similes/metaphors your writing style would improve massively!

Good luck with the changes and I look forward to seeing your edits and future chapters!

Jae

Not my usual read... but it should be!

I am really enjoying reading this so far, and I can't wait to read some more! I have to stop for now because I have plans that mean I've got to leave my house (I know, it's a tragic time for me), but I am so excited to see where you take the story as I continue to read more! I wanted to write a review now because I already have some thoughts that will hopefully be helpful.

You have a great writing style when it comes to plot twists/cliffhangers. You have used them in basically every chapter so far and it honestly just makes me want to keep on reading (boo for having to leave my house). But you should be careful with your use of repetition. Sometimes you repeat the same word or phrase within the same paragraph or even sentence. Obviously, this is sometimes necessary. But when reading through your work so far I noticed a few examples where you could use synonyms to add variety to your writing. Also, be careful with your use of tenses - sometimes you have a habit of changing tense within the same paragraph when it really isn't necessary.

Luckily though, these are things that are easy to fix! So I wouldn't worry about them at all.

Like I said earlier, I can't wait to read the rest over the coming weeks and get to learn more of the secrets I know you'll be hiding at the end of every chapter.

Keep up the great work, Jae!

Such a touching story

I really liked the first story, I look forward to future stories too. I am, and always will be, a feminist. I really believe in the importance of pieces of literature that have a meaningful impact, and I'm sure the rest of these stories will do - just like the first one. Keep up the good work, I look forward to reading future stories!

In sickness and in health

I am absolutely hooked if you read this I'm sure you will be too! I have so many questions, and I hope that some of them will be answered eventually. I can't wait to read more of this as it comes out, Such a great piece of work that is extremely well-written. Full of interesting characters I can't wait to learn more about, and great descriptions that paint a vivid image in my head!

SINISTER

This work doesn't have plot twists, it has goddamn plot u-turns. And cliffhangers for days - I'd highly recommend reading this, I can't wait to read the rest when it's finished. I enjoyed this work more than I thought I would as it's not my usual genre of reading.