J. Dessarroy

The Abyss

An assemblage of words wearing a human face.

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A Fantastical Whirlwind of Action

In a society threatened by a dangerous power struggle spanning across generations, Princess Artemis flees for her life and crosses paths with the kind David Fallon and many others along the way throughout the twists and turns of her journey. This tale of adventure places emphasis on conflicting prophesies heavily influenced by Greek and Roman mythology but also includes Catholicism as part of the mix, making for an interesting but cohesive blend of traditions and beliefs. The successful intermingling of belief systems creates a duality of perspectives that can appeal to religious people and mythology lovers.
With a well-thought-out and skillful pacing, this story is a treat for those wanting to indulge a love for fantasy. Artemis, The Dodekatheon Saga is a fusion of lore that is complex enough to hold interest with its high-action plot but possesses a flow that feels quite natural and enables the reader to lose themselves in the plot, swept up and carried away by memorable characters coping with thrilling circumstances.

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Intelligent Fiction

This collection of short stories is nothing less than an excellent medley of various ideas and themes cleverly communicated through concise and yet affecting writing. Each tale is artfully told by assembling details and varying perspectives that bring to mind many questions facing society as a whole as science and technology continues to expand in complex and intriguing ways. Each character and setting is easy to sink into even as the meticulous weaving of topics and ideas unfold on multiple levels.

The world we live in today is transfixed by all manners of technological advances, regardless of whether many consider these to be reliable or providing true convenience and improved productivity. Each story in Tell Me leaves the reader wanting more, whether through a re-read so as to catch all salient details scattered through the collection, or through reaching the end of one of the short tales within, eager for more. It evokes thoughts and ideas that are to be explored through the initial telling, but also once the story has completed and the reader remains compelled to reflect more on humanity's complicated relationship with technology, consciousness, and reality.

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Great work!

I'm not sure of how I found your work, but I'm very pleased to have done so! Lots of interesting ideas in this story, including but not limited to the government-enforced social hierarchy and anxiety-inducing dystopian qualities of the world they live in.
I liked Ruby Four from the first paragraph in, she's tough, she's relatable, she's real, and she doesn't let fear get in the way of testing the waters, especially if it's for the sake of survival. I wasn't sure of how I felt about Miles but... perhaps he's less sketchy than the others in his numbered class.
You have a compelling way of writing characters and plot, as well as an interesting narrative voice, both of which leaves me wanting to know more.
Very nicely done and, please, keep spinning this suspenseful tale of intrigue and survival!

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Exit Sign: A Spectator's Review

This story contains well thought out descriptions of interactions that are given as much vivacity and liveliness as a play might possess as it is observed, with some moments containing more elements of comedy and others carrying the sharp, mournful notes of tragedy. The battle scenes in multiple chapters were creatively written, offering an adventurous exploration of what many might deem 'ordinary' interactions, however, the perception of these social interactions is dismissed in favour of a point of view that dramatizes goings-on in an extremely fun, vivid way.

Some details and descriptions stand out with an almost tangible clarity, such as the mild personification of the wind and her cold, touchy fingers. This was an interesting use of the device, one of many neat details scattered throughout the text.
The dialogue written throughout is honest but also allows the reader to peer into the psyche of Dave as he interacts with those he crosses paths with, but the inner workings of his thought process colours the plot and setting with the way he views the world. Is he depressed or is he simply removed? What has happened to him? What will happen to him? Is he deeply unhappy or is he simply a realist? Will his story end in pleasant denouement or will he be facing an unravelled personal tragedy? These questions and more have a tendency to arise as the plot unfurls, giving the reader more to chew on while finding out more about Dave's personal history and what has brought him to develop the unique perspective through which he views the world around him.

The introspection Dave undertakes throughout the story [such as chapter 6 ~ October 5th, during his race to beat the traffic lights, for instance] is flavoured with a refreshing individualism, however, it also gives way to a relatability that reminds readers that we all are simply players upon the stage of life, subject to the whims of the script written by the invisible hand, given emotions, impulses, and other psychosocial inclinations that play a part in directing human consciousness.

Looking forward to seeing how it all plays out.

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An excellent read.

This lengthy but gratifying short story is excellently written, featuring a compellingly enigmatic artifact of unspeakable dangers. With its tantalizing pacing and colourful descriptions, Yog Sothoth's Box lures readers through a tale of mystery building to a delightful crescendo of madness and tension, blending realities using the narrator's universe as well as Lovecraft's Cthulhu mythos. The peculiar cube at the centre of this tale infects its victims deliciously, spreadings its effects throughout the text as the reader is taken on a journey of madness and unsavoury, sanity-shattering revelations.

This story is an extremely satisfying read for anyone captivated by HPL's work. It also possesses an inviting originality of its own, making it an excellent standalone narrative that also provides readers immerse themselves and indulge themselves with the opportunity to discover more of the mythos - if they dare.

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Having Reached Chapter 25 In His Pomegranate Queen

His Pomegranate Queen is a retelling of the Greek myth about Persephone's descent to the Underworld, away from her mother, Demeter, and the upper world's warmth and light of the sun, it is also a touching, emotionally riveting story of love and romance standing the test of time as well as other complicating circumstances.

This story features other deities of the Greek Pantheon, along with their distinct features concisely explained for any readers unfamiliar with their roles and personalities. Some background information about ancient Greek culture and polytheism is also included, providing some fun and casually educational tidbits that further tickle the imagination. The Greek alphabet at the beginning of each chapter gives the story a more immersive feel, with meaningfully chosen quotes used to precede each chapter, further lending greater depth to the central text.
Skilfully told, the plot contains lush descriptions that are all at once immersive and interesting, the many deities featured throughout are given depth and distinct personalities, and their characters are built up at a very nice pace so that it is very easy to empathize or relate to them despite their immortal/deific status.

A soft criticism is that there are some spelling errors, misused words, or punctuation missing throughout some areas in the chapters that, were they to be corrected, would improve readability even further.

Overall, however, quite an enjoyable read, and one that draws readers in and sparks a hungering for the next chapter as this story also has excellent pacing, with emotional cliffhangers and vivid scenes that capture readers as BlueRose_712 cleverly weaves a tale Arachne would be impressed with.

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On The Roller Coaster That Is SINISTER

Levy, who is a bit of a reckless protagonist, has a troubled childhood, rising up from a family with skewed personal boundaries and a history of abuse, growing into an adolescence of debauchery and excess.
Levy's existence as one bearing the image of flawed perfection begins to crumble as he is drawn into a grisly set of circumstances beyond his control, with much of a fast-paced plot revolving around an ongoing incestuous relationship occurring in time with a periodically revisited murder investigation that is used to keep readers curious where smutty incest scenes may not.

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Feel The Burn

Love Is A Slow Burn is a romance filled with the push and pulls, ebb and flow, and ups and downs of romantic attraction, desire, pain and, ultimately, of self-preservation. Eve struggles with her past as she navigates her way through life, with the narrator showing her thought process as she experiences the uplifting highs and devastating lows of an abusive relationship.
This story contains neat plot devices, such as intimate journal entries scattered across multiple chapters, as well as recurring themes (secrets, forbidden desire, the passage of time) or objects (scrubs, for instance!) that lend a solemn but whimsical feel to the overall plot, but this isn't to say the story is solely light-hearted for an emotional intensity continues to mount as the plot builds, gently reaching a satisfying conclusion.

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On Marshmallows

I enjoyed this first chapter of Marshmallows, with its urgent beginning and colourful phrasing. You've got an engaging way of writing, with characters rich with emotion, and Blue's exasperated and sharp personality is charming and a little comedic at times. I think you're off to a good start and I hope you keep going whenever you're able to, unravel and reveal the plot to us some more!

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Well done.

There's A Place For Us is a heartwarming tale, one involving the coming together of Hugo and Timothy, two young men doing their utmost to survive life and its endless possibilities. Their meeting, friendship and eventual romantic love for one another celebrates same-sex desire in a meaningful way while also pulling at the reader's heartstrings as more and more details are revealed through their interactions with one another. This is a dual-rediscovering of love after facing trauma and abuse, it also sends forth a powerful message about sexual assault, rape culture, and how both of these impact male survivors and their experiences.
My only suggestion would be to edit for spelling and grammar, particularly throughout later points in the story.
Overall, a well-thought-out story with clever foreshadowing and plenty of other details that lend further meaning to the narrative. This is a must-read for lovers of, both, drama and romance genres.

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On The Trials Of Loyalty

I enjoyed reading this first chapter of The Trials Of Loyalty.
The Ghost is quite the compelling name for a fugitive on the run, and it instantly made me curious with regard to what he's done to earn himself that alias. The crimes he is being sought out for do not disappoint and the plot instantly gets even juicier once we discover the twist. This first chapter is filled with intrigue, and Savannah really holds her own despite her superiors' misleading behaviours. She is a likeable character and I'm sure many readers will naturally find themselves rooting her on.
I don't really have any criticism, everything looks good and the flow feels swift but nice. This was a great start to hook readers in and leave them wanting more.

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On African Short Stories, Chapter 1

A heartfelt short story that includes details of the socio-cultural challenges facing Yoruba women and girls in a world that frequently favours males over females. In this, you've given us a look at life in Yoruba society- all centred around the perspective of the brave and patient Asake.
Family issues are common for most people, though what is not often discussed are the troubles facing women as they are subjected to social norms that are all at once challenging and divisive, this story does a nice job of exploring some of these issues. Asake is faced with a multidimensional set of challenges that are rendered more complex by her husband's decision to take a second wife, trying to encourage a passion for education in others as she is abused at home- none of which have taken away from her strength and commitment to survival.
The only criticism I have for this story would be that there are some corrections that can be made to spelling and punctuation, just to further improve readability, but outside of this I have nothing more to suggest.
I enjoyed this story for a number of reasons, including a tender ending for the protagonist, Asake. I'm relieved to see that she was able to receive her wish of having a child of her own and I'm glad that she'll love and appreciate her child regardless of Alabi's gendered preference. You've written an excellent story and I hope that you will continue doing so as myself and others would certainly like to read about the lives of other women in Africa! I'll follow you and stick around to see if you will write more.
Well done, Gloriia, keep it up!

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A Fun, Action-Filled Creepypasta

I love the absolute chaos that ensued throughout each of these logs.
"Who's smiling now, jackass?" was an incredibly satisfying line to read, and well-timed, and so were the following instances where J.T. got to unleash clever one-liners that fit the moment so well. The first chapter acted as a great prologue, nicely compelling and with quick but detailed descriptions that really make it easy to see the wildly disorienting circumstances ensuing all the way to the very end. It's also easy to like J.T. and I found myself cheering him on, the way he narrated was sometimes funny but also relatable, so the way he would think things sometimes gave me a bit of a chuckle.

Bit of a side note: a couple of years ago or so, a production company made NoEnd House and Candle Cove into [not so great] TV adaptations of the pastas but I'm thinking that this story might've made a better show. It'd be very interesting but also INSANE if creepypasta characters came to life.

I definitely ended up reading the rest of the story in one sitting. One of my favourite types of creepypastas are the ones that incorporate found footage or other forms of data, and you were able to execute this idea well, and to have sort of made the concept into a survival game was also fun.
The entire story was a good time, and I really have no real complaints in mind.
Nice work. This makes for an action-filled creepypasta that will be added to one of the reading lists I'm in the process of compiling.

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