Kaoz

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Peanuts

This reads a bit juvenile. I like the idea of the story and the myth of the double mates but the focus on the trio reads more like some teen is writing a fantasy?? Also, there are typos and sentences that dont make sense. Very distracting is the changes in POV from the three characters. I find that confusing and dont care for it myself. I think this story could be better, the writer just needs to figure out what story they will be telling.

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