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2 in 1?

I thought the first half had a really good flow to it, I was kind sad that it ended too quickly and changed to something else. I feel that you had kind of added two stories in one with the same characters. One of the biggest things I disliked about it is once the X started it was almost every other paragraph. It was like getting an XX movie from a porn shop, personally I'm not into that. You had some grammar errors which is to be expected from anyone. Overall, I did enjoy most of the story just kind of wish that it could have stayed more on that path then breaking off to another.

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