Krystalphlame

Interested

I like the style of writing. It flows. I know how it is to have it playing in your mind. It's close to my style, but we have to remember to slow it down and tell everybody else what we are experiencing, for example : What does the author see in their mind exactly? I like descriptive details because all I have are words to look at. I've only read three chapters but I plan on continuing.

I've finished the story. I noticed many punctuation discrepancies. The plot of the story is typical for sci-fi but as stated above needs much more salt and pepper. I couldn't find a connection to the characters as I would've liked to. I couldn't picture the scenery as I would've liked to. I don't know how old the author is but my guess from the writing is not very(choice of words). I'm a male and besides the sexy shirt scene there was not much for us guys. Conclusion: With tuff editing and revamping I believe "The Realm: Integration Book 2" could have some potential.