I feel for you soph.
In my personal opinion. It works. It's good and some parts are better than others. The dialogue is okay and easy to follow. I like the idea and the characters are really good too, but there are a few problems I found while reading. One is the grammar. Every now and again some words are out of place. It doesn't confuse the meaning of the sentence, but it is noticeable. Another thing is just personal opinion. Her father does nothing. It seems unlikely that a dad would react when it's just announced to everyone that her boyfriend was cheating on her. In front of him. If your arguing that her parents don't really care about her and that's why. They wouldn't worry about what she would do home alone. Overall however, I love the story. Keep it up.
Read the story now