Narugirl Twothousandthree

Overall Rating
Plot
Writing Style
Grammar Punctuation

Wow!

I thoroughly enjoyed this! Your writing was better in this one and I felt so bad for Lily. :( So glad James came to the rescue in more ways than one. ;) You need to write more James/Lily pieces. You are very good at them. :)

Read the story now
Overall Rating
Plot
Writing Style
Grammar Punctuation

Critique

First, I want to say well done. The plot was great and your style is easy to follow. However, you had some misspelled words in here and there were some grammatical issues in some sentences. You were missing some commas after prepositional phrases, McGonagall was spelled wrong a couple times, and some capitalization errors as well. Other than that, well done. I really enjoyed it. Keep up the good work.

The only advice I have is to get someone to read your material first before submitting; therefore, it will be more polished and less grammatically incorrect. :)

Again, well done and keep up the good work.

Read the story now

No badges received yet

About Us:

Inkitt is the world’s first reader-powered book publisher, offering an online community for talented authors and book lovers. Write captivating stories, read enchanting novels, and we’ll publish the books you love the most based on crowd wisdom.