Patrick Charnock

Cardiff

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Overall Rating
Plot
Writing Style
Grammar Punctuation

Well constructed, just needs tidying a little.

Good plotline and fast-moving. Definitely worth a read.
I found it very dialogue heavy in places and would have preferred some slightly more descriptive passages to set the scene. Not a criticism, just my personal taste.
As has been stated elsewhere, the punctuation and spelling could certainly do with another look and perhaps a quick edit.

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