I didn’t want to go to school today. Oleg called me and told what happened to her sister. He didn’t know that I was the reason why she was kidnapped and beaten up and I didn’t have the heart to tell him the truth.
I remained lying on my bed even though it was already 10 in the morning.
I’ve been contemplating about life and it’s making me crazy.
The knocking on the door woke me up from my thoughts. I got up, opened the door and saw Isaac standing in front of me with his usual poker face.
“The boss is calling for you,” he informed.
“Huh? You mean my dad?”
“No, I mean Clark,” Isaac corrected.
I flushed in embarrassment.
“H-he’s calling me? What for?”
“He wants to show you something.”
I blinked, tilting my head in
I changed my clothes while Isaac patiently waits for me. I stared at myself in the front of the mirror. I looked like a mess and it was embarrassing to face Clark like this.
But I had no choice. He’s calling me and I needed to see him.
I rubbed my face and sighed out loud. Getting out of my room, I saw Isaac leaning against the wall, his arms crossed.
He lifted his head and I saw those cold and dead eyes of his. I was scared to see him so intense, I wonder what happened.
“Let’s go,” Isaac said.
I followed him out of the house. I wanted to ask him if something was wrong but I couldn’t find my voice to talk to him. He’s screaming aura not to come close to him and talk or else something bad might happen.
The car was parked right outside the house. There were a few men loitering around but I ignored them. Isaac unlocked the door and opened it for me.
“Where are we going?” I finally asked as I watched Isaac enter the car and sit on the drivers seat.
He started the engine and began driving. It took him a full minute to answer.
“The boss caught the leader of the Voronin group.”
“W-wait, did Clark…?”
I saw Isaac’s hands tightened around the steering whee.
“He wiped out the whole Voronin group.”
A chill ran down my spine. I was speechless, just staring at Isaac with wide eyes.
Finally, I managed to say, “what kind of person is Clark?”
Isaac stepped on the brake, stopping before the stop light turned red.
He was looking straight head as he answered, “the kind of person you don’t want to make enemies with.”
“But you don’t have to worry. As long as you have him at your side, everything will be alright.”
I smiled a little, never noticing the scowl on Isaac’s face.
Isaac and I stood in front of a shabby house. There were cars parked outside but it looked like an abandoned place in the middle of a peaceful neighborhood.
“This is the place where Clark wants me to meet?” I asked.
Isaac nodded and said, “yes.”
I stepped forward but Isaac caught my hand, stopping me from walking. I turned around to look at him, raising a brow.
“What’s wrong?” I asked.
His hand was cold and slightly shaking. It worried me.
“Isaac?” I called out.
He had a scornful expression.
“You don’t need to go inside.”
I blinked, tilting my head.
“But Clark told me to go here,” I reasoned out.
Isaac lifted his head to stare me in the eye. Smiling in defeat, he sighed and lets go of my hand.
“I’ll be waiting for you here.”
I went inside the house, wondering why Isaac behaved that way. I haven’t seen him look at me like that.
There were three guys waiting for me and when they saw me, they led me to where Clark was. There was nothing inside the house, no furniture and whatsoever. We went downstairs, to the basement and I could hear faint sounds of crying from somewhere.
The guy in the middle opened the door to the end of the corridor, letting me in. I smiled at him before entering but it was quickly gone when I saw what was happening inside. My knees buckled and I was close to falling down on the floor. I held my nose to stop myself from puking at the sight of a man being butchered on top of a table. Clark was sitting on a chair while a guy continued to slice the dead body as if he was slicing an animal that’s about to be cooked.
Clark saw me and he smiled. Standing up, he tossed his phone to the nearest guy and walked towards me.
His shirt was tainted with blood and it was horrifying to see him like this again. He saw my reaction and he only smirked in amusement.
“You came late. What was Isaac doing?”
I gulped, my body trembling in fear. I couldn’t say anything.
“Boss,” the guy butchering a corpse called and Clark and I both looked at him, “this one’s finished.”
“Good. Wrap it up with the others.”
They began wrapping the cut up limbs in plastic wrappings and I had to look away so that I wouldn’t throw up. Everyone in this room acts like this was nothing out of the ordinary and it’s making me even more sick just from thinking about it.
“We’re going to sell their organs later this night,” Clark informed.
“A client overseas paid three million dollars for a whole set,” he said.
I paled after hearing the huge amount of money for buying human organs.
“I didn’t call you here to discuss about business.”
Clark turned to one of his men.
“Get him,” he shortly ordered to which his men nodded their heads before leaving the room.
I was frozen, scared to what Clark was planning on doing. People in the background were cleaning the room, moving out the tables and replacing it with a single chair in the middle of the room.
Returning my gaze back to Clark, I gasped out loud when I saw him staring at me with those cold blue eyes.
“You didn’t sleep last night?” he commented.
I furrowed my brows. It was a random remark and I dumbly stared at him.
He removed the leather gloves he was wearing from his right hand to run his thumb on the bags under my eyes. I jolted in surprise, feeling his cold fingers on my skin.
“A-ah this, this is just…I was thinking a lot of things last night,” I nervously said.
Clark narrowed his eyes at me but didn’t say anything.
I jumped, shocked to see the men who left a while ago came back, dragging a man that was struggling against them. They forced him to sit on the chair in the room, tying both his hands and feet. His brunette hair was messy, his eyes were unfocused and despite the cold air, he was sweating a lot. Wearing a dirty white shirt and boxers, his body were filled with tattoos and I immediately knew who he was.
The leader of the Voronin group.
“Please! Please, have mercy! Don’t kill me! Oh my god!”
It was heartbreaking to see someone begging for their life. It pained me to see him even though I know he was the one behind Valery’s kidnapping.
Someone approached Clark, giving him a rectangular steel box. He took it and went back to where I was standing. He opened the box and I squinted my eyes to see what the content was.
“Here,” he said, pulling my hand and slipping a golden brass knuckles.
I blinked at it, not sure why he was giving me this.
“What’s this for?”
“Brass knuckles,” Clark said in a dead voice. “You’re going to use this to torture this motherfucker.”
My eyes widened, my heart skipping a couple of beats.
“What?! I can’t do that!”
Clark raised a brow in amusement.
“You wanna be the next leader of the Orlov group, right? Punching someone isn’t supposed to be hard for someone like you,” he said.
I shook my head, pulling the brass knuckles off of my hand but before I could take it out, Clark grabbed my hand, pushing me against the wall. I coughed at the force of my back hitting the wall.
“Behave now, Drew,” Clark said, his voice sounding almost a whisper. “You don’t want me using that thing on you.”
I paled, shuddering in fear while I shake my head at Clark.
“Then do what I tell you and punch the living shit out of him.”
He squeezed my cheeks, forcing me to look up at him. His eyes were screaming danger and I knew I couldn’t defy this man.
Clark guided me to the man. It felt as if the room was rotating and it was getting harder for me to breathe. I wanted to run away from this place, to get back to my room and hide under my blanket but there’s no point.
“Watch,” Clark said, smirking at me.
His focus turned to the man sitting, sweating as he waited for his demise. Clark closed his left hand into a fist and I yelped when he swung his arm at the man, punching him straight on the mouth. He let out an agonized scream, blood splattering all over the place.
Clark retrieved his hand and a couple of teeth dropped down on the man’s lap. The bleeding of his mouth wouldn’t stop and he was whining from the pain, begging incoherently with a broken voice.
A guy neared Clark to give him a towel so that he could clean his hand covered in gloves. He turned to me and smiled.
“Now do the same thing.”
I’m so scared.
I wanna go home.
I don’t wanna be here.
Clark’s gaze warned me not to do anything he wouldn’t like. I was shaking as much as the guy in front of me.
I punched him with the brass knuckles but I slipped and I ended up falling on his lap. I shrieked, quickly getting off of him and apologizing for what I did. I could hear Clark’s men snickering behind me but I paid them no attention.
“Jesus,” Clark sighed in exasperation. “How hard is it for you, boss? This is humiliating.”
“I…I can’t do it!”
“What?” he snapped.
I straightened my back and faced the man who was obviously out of it. The punch he received from Clark earlier already dealt a lot of damage in his face. I’m sure he broke his jaw from that punch.
“Don’t make me wait, Drew,” Clark warned.
For the second time, I raised my arm to give the man a punch on the face. Unfortunately, my fist connected and I successfully hit him on the cheek, the brass knuckle making a dent on his skin. He cried out from the pain and I immediately felt bad.
“I’m so sorry I -- ”
Clark suddenly slapped me on the face, sending me flying on the floor. I clutched my aching cheek and I cried out, feeling the burning pain spreading across my face.
“The hell are you apologizing for?” he asked, his teeth gritting in anger. “This man tried to kill you and Valery and you’re going to apologize to him?”
The air in the room changed and I could sense everyone’s getting tensed.
“Do it right, Drew. You won’t leave this room until you do what I want.”
“I can’t do it…I can’t, Clark!”
Clark stepped forward me, grabbing me by the hair to bring me back to the man. I was crying from how he was handling me.
“Please…please Clark, I wanna go home!”
He pushed me to the Voronin leader and I saw him about to faint.
“Punch him again.”
“I don’t want to anymore!”
I cried out when Clark slapped me again, this time, it was much painful than before. I couldn’t stop myself from crying, wishing that I stayed back at home so that this wouldn’t happen.
“Every time you disobey me, I’m going to hurt you, Drew. And I’m going to hurt you so bad you’ll be wishing you’re dead.”
His threat got me sobbing like a kid. I hated pain, I hated it so much.
If I don’t do this, Clark with hurt me.
“I-I’ll do it…I’ll do it…” I reached out for Clark, grasping on his leg and begged him, “please…don’t…d-don’t hurt me anymore.”
I’m so scared but I have to do this.
Clark’s eyes softened but it was gone as soon as I saw it. He pulled me up by the collar of my neck.
“Do it properly this time, Drew. You understand?”
I stared at my feet, tears streaming down my cheeks as I nodded at Clark.
I was getting numb but I kept punching the man on the face. He fainted again but someone kept on waking him up so that I could continue hurting me.
Clark was sitting on his chair, his arms and legs crossed while watching me like a hawk.
How many hours have passed, I’m not sure. Both my hands were hurting, since Clark suggested on using both of it to torture the Voronin leader. The smell of blood doesn’t faze me that anymore, as well as the sight of it.
My mind was blank.
All of a sudden, I dropped down on the floor, panting from exhaustion. My clothes were soiled with the blood of our enemy.
“Drew,” Clark called and I jolted, fearing that he’s going to hurt me again. “Come here.”
I was so tired that I couldn’t even stand anymore but I didn’t want Clark to get angry with me again so I crawled my way towards him, dragging my body to where he was. I rested my head on his foot, my eyelids becoming heavy, a sign that I’m gonna fall asleep.
Clark pulled me up, making me kneel in front of him. I put my head on his lap and he started stroking my hair.
“You did a very good job, boss,” he praised.
“...you w-won’t hurt me anymore…?”
He grabbed my arm to take the brass knuckles off of my hand.
“No. I won’t hurt you as long as you obey me.”
I closed my eyes, smiling. The pain in my cheek from the slap Clark had given me was long gone and I was happy for it but at the same time, at the back of my head, I was thinking that I liked it.
I liked the pain.
I liked it.
I woke up, realizing that I was lying on a bed. I got up and I instantly knew where I was.
In Clark’s house.
I looked out the tall windows. It was already night. I checked the watch and saw that it was 11 pm.
Where is he?
I got out of the bed and walked out of the room, almost tripping over at the chair that I didn’t see in front of me. I pushed the door open and I saw Clark in the living room, sitting on the couch. He was busy with his phone.
Cans of beer were on top of the table in front of him and a lit-up cigarette sitting on the ashtray. I paled when I saw the different variety of guns on the table but I ignored it. I should get used to seeing things like this.
“Go back to sleep.”
I gaped at him, shocked that he knew I was up when he didn’t even see me getting out of the room.
“Call for delivery.”
Walking towards him, I sat on the sofa chair across from where he was.
“She visited Valery.”
I lowered my head, sad to hear Valery’s name. I should visit her tomorrow and tell her sorry for what happened.
“Does it still hurt?”
Not looking at my way, Clark said, “your cheek. Does it still hurt?”
I touched it and shook my head.
“No. It doesn’t anymore.”
We fell into silence and it was becoming awkward for me. Looking around to find something interesting to talk about, I saw the beer and smiled.
“C-can I have some?”
“You’re a mess when you drink.”
I grabbed an unopened can and grinned at him.
“I’m in the mood to drink so it’s gonna be okay.”
It was definitely not okay. Just a few sips and I was already drunk.
I heard Clark sighing.
“I told you,” he said sarcastically. “Don’t force yourself.”
I was dizzy and I began having hiccups. I stood up and my knees were wobbling. Staring at Clark with a hazed vision, I wanted to tell him a lot of things.
About my decision to becoming the leader of the Orlov.
About the Voronin incident.
But most of all, I wanted to tell Clark that I’m attracted to pain. It sounded absurd. I’m a coward, someone who cries just by seeing blood.
It’s alarming me that I’m loving the pain of being hurt by Clark.
It was scary at first but as soon as the pain spread throughout my body, it turned into some sort of a pleasurable feeling.
Not only pain but the insulting things he was saying to me, it was such a turn on.
Why am I like this?
I’m so messed up.
How could I become the leader of a Mafia group if I’m like this?
I’m such a loser.
Clark would hate me if I remain like this.
I dropped the can and the liquid spilled on the floor. It woke me up from my thoughts, apologizing at Clark who just glared at me.
“Just go back to sleep,” he said. “You’re irritating me.”
I felt a pang in my heart.
He didn’t answer me.
Still no answer.
He finally lifted his head to look at me, irritation evident on that handsome face of his. I successfully neared him and I was proud of myself that I didn’t fall over.
“What do you want?”
Clark’s voice was deep, scary, intimidating and it was turning me on even more.
Even with all the things he did to me, I’m still so in love with him.
I love Clark.
I love him.
I’m so sorry but I love him.
Putting aside all the doubts and the fear, I threw myself on Clark. He gasped at what I did but before he could say something, I was already kissing him on the lips. I could smell his scent and it was arousing.
I clumsily kissed him. He didn’t reacted at first but when I opened my mouth, he suddenly grabbed a fistful of my hair, his tongue entering to play with mine. He sucked and licked it, twirling it against each other, leaving me breathless and wanting for more.
His other hand roamed on my back, slipping it under my shirt. Before I knew it, Clark was already undressing me. He pushed me on the couch and I watched him crawl above me with a predatory gaze in his eyes.
My lips were tingling, an electric sparks running all through out my body.
I gave Clark a sly smile.
“Hurt me more. That’s an order.”