This novel is limited to 100 free copies due to its part in Inkitt’s Novel Contest.
It was a long day; perhaps even longer than what a day should be. It was also hot, so scorching outside one would pray for a cool summer breeze, rain, and even snow to cool down their sweaty bodies. This was caused by those learning at “the school”; the students had periodic tests every three months which affected the human world just miles below theirs. It was not a normal school either; it was one which haunted the nightmares of humans-they knew it was there-they had seen the clear glass transportation pods travelling between the skies and earth. The hum of air-conditioners filled the still air as they fought at full power to keep those in the houses alive.
None of the houses faced each other; it was a design to help cut down on traffic in neighborhoods. It was a dystopian view of the future, all tightly packed with barely any grass, gray buildings with small windows. The garage would host one old model Ferrari, but could now host three of the slim cracker shaped hover cars. Each roof had its own code dish which converted the light into energy. There were no longer telephone poles or power boxes; one would no longer have to flip a breaker to restart part of their house. An older man stood next to a small, blazing fire at the end of a long row of houses; a teenager was an arm’s length away from the teacher.
"Put it out, come on put it out!"
"I can't." A boy at the age of nineteen stood next to the teacher, he was panting and looked close to death from heat exhaustion. Any other kind human would’ve offered him a drink of water, but not now. If he was to pass the test, he would have to produce the water himself, something he appeared to be very incapable of.
The man was wearing a black suit jacket over a long sleeved, white collared shirt with dark red tie; he was used to living in a room in which you could glaze pottery.
The boy paled in comparison to his current element instructor. His dark blue shirt was lying on the ground, sweat soaked and smoking in places because of the fire so near it. He was quite tan, and without his clothing one could see his ribcage standing out in stark contrast to the rest of his build. He seemed to be much too slim, almost unhealthy. He had bright red hair and mellow brown eyes. His jeans were shredded at the bottom, the smoking remains proved they had been set on fire at one point during the test. The ground below him was muddy from sweat, splashing his converse in artistic patterns. His knees appeared to be shaking and his socks had been bunched down around his ankles in an attempt to cool himself, if only slightly.
"Do it, now," the teacher ordered, the glare on his face appeared permanent, his exasperation with the student obvious.
"I-I c-can't. I'm sorry sir, it's too hot." The boy slowly sunk down onto his knees, the gravel digging into his flesh; it would later leave small cuts and bumpy ridges in his soft skin. He did not notice, however, he was too exhausted to care much more than wishing he was out of the heat.
"Do it boy!" The teacher nearly spit in his face. The student began to pant his clenched teeth making a slight hissing noise; he begged for water as his body came closer to the earth, his arms and legs attempting to hold him off the parched ground. "Weak."
"Forgive me," the boy whispered and his arms gave way; they slid behind him, scratching against the ground. His face crashed painfully into the rocks, blood dribbled from his nose a few seconds after impact. The student’s mouth stayed open, his breath slowing to a dangerous pace. The fire in front of him melted into nothing and the heat ebbed off, and the hum of air conditioners became quieter. Birds in the trees began to chirp again, disturbed as the boy’s body rolled in the gravel. The acceptable summer heat had children coming outdoors to enjoy the what lawn they had, which was now a little yellowed, the working class settled into their cars for long travel, and animals began to slink out and communicate brightly.
A transportation pod glided slowly out of the sky. It’s gleaming, sleek, glass exterior shot off distracting and blinding flashes as it met the sun just right. Inside the circular doors were plush, blue velvet cushions which the teacher set the boy on. After taking one more sweeping glance over the land which had recently been much drier, he too climbed into the pod which carried them up into the clouds. To any passerby who lived in the area, they would know exactly what had just taken place; for the occasional visitor, however, the scene seemed one of cruelty and abuse. The police ignored these calls, having been informed of the day for when the tests would take place. With only one school in the country hosting several thousand students, it was a crowded and intense time for training. The police however, hadn’t known a student to be this troublesome before. The elements had been acting too extreme.
The students attending the school in the sky were not normal, however, nor were they by any means classified as disabled. When a teacher was given a difficult subject they would often call this school and report the “trouble” the student had caused. Representatives in red robes would then come and witness the “trouble” and if they found it noteworthy, they were removed from human society. These students didn’t just learn correctional behaviors, no, they had a power uniquely their own. The lucky few who were chosen to attend had the power to control the elements. They had been dubbed “the wicked ones”, “the kids who would make the world burn”, “the children who would destroy the planet, set deadly plagues, or make each human being suffer in great agony; such agony, death would be bliss.” It was people like this which the humans had to watch out for, in the blink of an eye one could become carbon dust blowing away in the wind, never returning to their families again. This is why they were separated from society, because their powers were so uncontrolled; an uncontrolled elementalist means one thing, death-for either the controller or those they have meaninglessly attacked. The council keeps a strict watch on all their subjects and one unlucky boy is about to fall into their hands.
The pod began its spiral upward to the parking plaza. Though the wind tossed rain, sleet, and hail around in wild patterns, battering the dark clouds in every direction; it stayed blissfully calm and never wavered. There as they broke the horizon of a never ending storm stood the majestic columns of a separate civilization. It looked as though it had been placed on Mount Olympus itself; beautiful ivory stone led the way to the top where a majestic school sat. At night the houses would glimmer in flashes of gold, but in the day they shone in pure silver. It was a refuge, for those who had long abandoned their old home among what was referred to as “normalcy.” No human had ever breeched the protection this whole world radiated. While it may be a part of Earth, it was as if living outside the Milky Way. Even in the sun, small stars would glimmer and shine, winking down at those who ventured out into the cobblestone paths.
This was the academy. The pod gently touched down just below the marble steps leading to a grand oak door. On these steps four monumental Doric columns held up the high ebony roof. The dragons on each corner protected the land with fearsome resolution. Two men clothed in tight blue robes with silver lining rushed down the steps to the pod, they appeared to be blue heavenly angels. Their clothes appeared to be choking them, the neck line so high and the coat pulled over tightly with gold buttons to their right breast. The teacher stepped away, allowing the healers to take charge of the nineteen year old. They carried him up the stairs, the doors emblazoned with a mirage of symbols opened as they approached, so they need not hassle with the unnecessary.
The teacher headed to a smaller side building to report the news of the test. It would be seven pages of tedious paperwork which would surely send his charge to the grave. He winced at the terrible knowledge he had a hold of, if only there was some way to not send them to “that place.” The place where one entered in darkness and left in the same manner, where the unknown was to be loved, and where red was the color of new beginning and death. He swallowed hard, he had only seen the red robes twice in his life and he feared them. This is where the boy was headed and no amount of pity would save him.
“And what exactly are we to call this new world in the clouds?” A woman asked as she stood at the base of earth which had just been raised miles above their heads. A great mountain removed within moments was a beautiful sight to behold for this small group of nine who would grow to be hundreds more.
“I do not know, but what I do know is what our people shall be called. No longer shall we live in fear or pain because we can do things others can’t. We will live in harmony, one with another with few ruling over to keep peace between us and those who have come to fear us.” The man replied, his arms still raised towards the heavens.
“And what shall we be called, what shall us, those who can control the life and death of those around us, who can pull the stars and planets into any pattern they desire, who can set fires and put them out, who can hide in earth and storm, who will keep us lifted in the sky and in fortune?”
“Elementalists, for we can control the earth itself, every movement, every ounce of life through our own will. It is best we are separate from these people. They are too normal, too plain, and too full of emotion. I call them ‘human’ for they are not us.”
“Elementalists. I can feel it in my bones, the power surging through.”
“Diana, be calm.” He grasped her shoulders tightly, her eyes rolled back into her head. The whites of her eyes were more haunting than the demon humans who had plagued their minds for so long.
“But they have hurt me so, they have brought destruction to my life, and they have caused more damage than I ever could. They deserve to suffer.”
“DIANA!” He screamed, but in a moment her body had been whipped away in the wind.
The earth was rumbling and those standing fell, the planets began to change and separate, the sky was dragged and rent apart in harsh black lines bringing darkness to the world in one swift movement. There was no longer up or down, right or wrong, land and ocean, it was as one. When it ended the group could tell the world would never be the same. The man who had named their new world and civilization screamed as he saw what had happened. Diana had rent the world apart and destroyed its very foundation, in doing so she had destroyed herself. Her bloody and torn remains forever haunted the walkways of the earth. It was then, whether Elementalist or Human, they knew; they knew what could happen, what could become of them in an instant. It was war.
In the infirmary a healer stood waiting, the clinical diagnostics screen already open. She was shifting information around the clear glass to better organize it as her patients information was fed through the wireless connection. She didn’t notice as the boy was set on the bed next to her, she was checking his current vitals and school records. She winced at the information, feeling sorry for the boy placed in her care. The reports led to nothing good and a good portion of it shocked her, especially when a message from the council appeared in the lower right corner. As Rose waited for him to wake up she decided to read through his most recent information.
Name: Ethan Silverspoon
Birthday: June 1, 1997
Eye Color: Brown
Hair Color: Red
Height: 5’ 10”
Time Spent at Academy: 5 years
Grade Reports: 0.0 Fail
Element Test Files
Curious, Rose opened the tab to his test files and began to peruse the results to see if it would explain anything more about the teenager she was in charge of. She wasn’t sure if it was part of protocol, being new to the job.
December 31, 2012- End of Eighteen Month Initiation to the Academy
Elementalist subject shows positive signs for being able to control one of the elements. So far he doesn’t seem to be affiliated with any of the currently inhabited elements, testing will further prove his worth in a designated area.
March 31, 2013- First Storm Element Test
Ethan shows no proclivity towards the element, he cannot create a single gust of wind to even ruffle the hair on my head. While he can control the destruction of an already formed tornado, we don’t know if his element is specialized to one form inside the broad topic.
June 30, 2013- Second Storm Element Test
During the test Ethan passed out and was transferred to the infirmary. It is determined he is not part of the Storm Element and should be moved onto the next element as soon as possible.
September 30, 2013- First Fortune Element Test
Ethan does not appear to have the foresight to see where his own life may be going, but he can find those who have death in their near future as confirmed by me, Danielle Withers. We will continue to train him and see if he can later control the fortune around him.
December 31, 2013- Second Fortune Element Test
Ethan cannot control the slightest bit of fortune, good or bad. I see no further signs that he should ever continue in this program.
March 31, 2014- First Life Element Test
Ethan has not shown any ability to be kind to the patients past giving out free room and board for those who have not enjoyed the hospitality of the Academy. We will continue to train him upon orders by the council, but we do not hold much hope.
June 30, 2014- Second Life Element Test
Ethan managed to concoct a deadly substance which nearly killed himself and several other highly trained life elementalists. We have removed him from the program and hope we will never have a disaster like this again. We have recommended he have a healer at all times around him when in the infirmary again.
September 30, 2014- First Air Element Test
Ethan nearly fell to his own death today, after incapably falling over the edge of the academy. One of our newer students was lucky enough to catch him and return him to safety. We will be keeping a closer eye on him from now on.
December 31, 2014- Second Air Element Test
After many damages which included part of the front of the school falling to the human world, we have decided it would be safer if he continue his studies in another element.
March 31, 2015- First Fire Element Test
Most of the village was lost in an uncontrolled fire, we fear for the safety of the Elementalist population concerning Ethan Silverspoon.
June 30, 2015- Second Fire Element Test
If we do not end up at war with the human population it will be a blessing and a miracle. Ethan should be moved to a different element immediately.
September 30, 2015- First Earth Element Test
Nothing destroyed, everything seems usual. It is a blessing having reviewed previous reports on Ethan’s tests, yet he shows no ability to control the earth whatsoever.
December 31, 2015- Second Earth Element Test
My decision to keep several practiced earth elementalists on hand during the test was a wise decision. The chasm which not only let a few of the instructors fall through to earth also split the school in half. Please move him, quickly, to another element.
March 31, 2016- First Water Element Test
Ethan is a student who has extreme concentration and appears to want to fit into our society, I hope his abilities will move forward in the future. Possibly moving past almost drowning a room full of people, which was frightening.
June 30, 2016- Second Water Element Test
The student appears weak, even with the smallest fire possible he was not able to conjure an ounce of pure water to put out the flame. While he dripped with sweat which could’ve dampened even a forest fire, I see no need to move him further along in this element any more.
Rose stared in shock at the reports on him; surely this would mean a visit to the council. Her blue eyes darted to his shifting form, she pitied him. Young and whole with no signs of being fully human nor fully elementalist, she’d never heard of someone like him before and prayed he would not see the red robes before his inevitable death. She quickly flipped open the letter from the council with instructions for both his healer and him, her eyes scanned it quickly, she tried to not let her emotions over take her work.
Please kindly inform Ethan a letter will be delivered to him as soon as he wakes which will give him further instructions on his continued existence at the academy. We’re pleased in your work and hope to see him in fine condition after he is back in the world of the living.
Wishing you all the luck in your healing endeavours,
Your healer should’ve informed you of our second letter. Please follow the instructions it contains and we hope you will be in better health shortly.
With all our grace to your wellbeing,
The large windows of the infirmary let in large columns of light, giving his red waves of hair a soft, fiery glow; the light often blinded patients on the other side of the ward. The white cotton sheets were itchy under Ethan’s now twitching hands, but they were more comfortable than the dorms. Soft downy feather pillows and mattresses made from finest polyester with soft cotton stuffing made the stay enjoyable. Ethan recalled how many elementalists tried to fake an illness just to stay in the infirmary, but unlike humans, this plan was more likely fail, unless one ran across a kind worker who took pity on the students who suffered on the beds provided every night. Occasionally one would see pale blue curtains around a bed, but this sight was rare, no elementalist had been terribly injured since the last war with the human race. Rose gently let her hand hover an inch above Ethan, it glowed as it scanned him for final information. It was then distributed to the computer which sent out a live spiral feed to the main computer for storing.
“Good afternoon,” Rose greeted with a smile once she realised Ethan was fully awake and staring up at her. She quickly closed the reports on the screen and brought up his vital signs. Her lips pursed as she scanned the information, she swept a strand of brown hair behind her shoulder as she turned to face her patient. “Your temperature is currently a hundred and three point six, which is quite low. I’m going to give you a small shot to help bring it back up.”
Ethan nodded in understanding, he had learned in his initiation all about his own personal care as an elementalist. Their body temperatures ran at a hundred and six to a hundred and eight Fahrenheit. It seemed as though they had been specifically designed to take the higher temperatures which would kill a human. Rose collected the necessary needle from a nearby medical tray and flipped its top off before gently bending down and inserting it into his elbow.
He waited quietly while Rose went to a store cupboard in the back, he knew the procedures of the infirmary having visited so often and experiencing his own training for the life element. He lifted the water glass on the glass bedside table and drank the water inside. Ethan’s healer returned with a metal tray, saltine crackers and various cooked meats were strewn across two plates. As Ethan ate, Rose went back over his diagnostics to make sure his body would return to full health. Her eyes wandered back to the report file she had read through earlier and the unidentified element. Everything about him screamed “elementalist,” yet here he was, tested through ever element and he could not control a single one. She wondered what would become of the teenage boy currently in her care.
“I’ve noticed there’s some missing information on your file,” Rose stated calmly as she moved the little vitals around the screen to view them better.
“What would that be?” Ethan asked, part of his cracker still in his mouth.
“It just seems that your element space is not filled in and you’ve been here for quite a long time.”
“Yeah five years,” Ethan stated dully.
“Do you think you could tell me what it is and I can edit it in?”
“I don’t have one.”
“What?” Rose looked at him sharply in shock.
“I don’t have an element; it’s unidentified and therefore blank.” Ethan was staring down at the tray of food, no longer looking as though he wanted to eat any of it. Rose bit her lip, she should’ve known based on his information, but she hadn’t wanted to believe it.
“So you’ve been unidentifiable for all the time you’ve been here?”
“Yep, and I’m guessing what tomorrow will bring.” Ethan’s chest constricted in a self-pitying laugh, but he didn’t make a single noise.
“The council has informed me that they’re sending you a letter with instructions inside.” Rose stated her voice no longer cheerful.
“Right,” Ethan shifted and took another bite of the food, his eyes shifting nervously to the glass bedside table next to him. His phone was sitting there, still and blending in with the table top. Rose knew what he was looking for, he was waiting for the screen to flash white. “I think the council knows I’ve wreaked enough havoc in every element department. I’m sure I’m the story of what not to do in all the lessons now days. I’m sure they want to discuss my future options. Here I sit with the body of an elementalist and with some proclivity in certain areas, but not able to control a single one.”
Her lips pursed to the side, she was nervously fidgeting, trying to figure out what to say. Ethan shifted, the tray tilting slightly as he tried to lay down and rest.
“I’ll take that from you if you’re done.”
“Yeah thanks,” Ethan let the tray slide into her hands and she hurried away. He swallowed thickly, staring up at the ceiling. The healer had returned however and his eyes met her nervous pair of blue ones.
“What’s your name?” She asked quickly.
“I’m sure you already know that and a lot of other information about me.”
“My mother always taught me it’s polite to ask, especially when starting a conversation even if you already know their name.”
“It’s Ethan, Ethan Silverspoon.”
“I’m Rose Sylvester,” she smiled brightly at him and he blinked. He had never received this much hospitality from a healer before, it was unnerving.
Just then the screen on his phone flashed and he knew what was coming. He reached out blindly for it, the cool glass panel made him want to drop it on the floor and never know what it had to say. In the recesses of his mind however he knew it would be like the other day, back before he had taken his second water element test. Taking a deep breath, he moved his thumb across the screen and tapped in his name for access. There, blaring brightly on the screen was one of his worst nightmares; the same nightmare as many other elementalists experienced at different intervals.
The message was coated in a red background with readable black writing. His fingers moved numbly to close the message but a sentence at the end caught his fearful eyes and he, frozen, read the entirety of the message hoping he had not seen those words together in a sentence. Perhaps his mind was simply playing tricks on him.
We on the council regret to hear of your failure of the water element test. We have feared this outcome and prayed to the mightier elementalists before us that you would be graced with their love and spirit. They have not answered our deepest prayers however and we ask that you join us tomorrow. We have heard word of your faint exterior from the instructor set to test you and hope you are feeling much better tomorrow when you join us for a cuppa.
We will discuss your future promptly at ten O’clock in the morning, please report to the locked door on the third floor by the tall windows. We are sure you know the one. We pray to the original elementalists again tonight and hope our meeting will not end in your inevitable death.
Enjoy the rest of your day,
His eyes closed and he dropped the phone to his chest, Rose respectfully stepped away to go and record further information and tend to other patients. Ethan spent the next hour resigning himself to his fate, one in which he would never see the outside world again.
Ethan recalled the conversation and subsequent hours leading up to his fate; he would not call it destiny-as no one's destiny could be death. It would be a destiny one would not want to live for, literally. The water element professor had approached him one day near the test, he had been held behind because his things were scattered. The more proficient elementalists in the class bullied him relentlessly, and nonetheless sent his belongings to the farthest corners of the classroom. He had just found one of his erasers under a nearby desk when Professor Emma VonBerg addressed him; he whipped up and cracked his head on the metal support beams. She had quickly apologized for making him hit his head and handed him an ice cube from her hand, which he took to be polite, bumping his head was no big deal.
"Ethan, you realize that if you fail this water element test you are going to be classified as a rogue elementalist." Professor VonBerg took a seat in the next desk over, Ethan walked calmly back to where his things were and rummaged longer than necessary in the pockets.
"I am quite aware of the situation, yes." He stated, his voice let her know there was a lifetime of fear behind his brown eyes, the icy edge slippery and cracked which she now stood on with him. Either of them could fall with this conversation, it was just a matter of who would weigh more in the end.
"I suggest you do a bit of study and practice, it might help you with your exam tomorrow." Emma suggested politely, he had been a wonderful boy to have in her classes and now dreaded what would happen to him.
“No amount of study and practice is going to help me tomorrow if it hasn’t helped me thus far. I don’t think any of the teachers at this school would really be disappointed if I failed.”
“I disagree, but I have to follow orders. I’ve been instructed to give you this,” Emma held out a blood red envelope with black writing curling fancily into Ethan’s name on the front. He snatched it from her hand; he would let it burn him instead. He half expected it to shout at him, but it was just a normal letter, he wished it would.
“Thanks,” Ethan mumbled tossing his bag over his shoulder and turning to leave.
“And Ethan?” Emma called before he was out the door. He turned, not saying anything. “Good luck,”
He climbed the flights of stairs numbly, he watched in envy as air elementalists pushed themselves up effortlessly through the spiraling staircase. If they chose, they would never have to walk anywhere again. Water elementalists teasingly jetted water at the flying students, some kind fire elementalists stopped the water from hitting. Ethan ducked lightning bolts and bricks, some of those he passed glanced at the red envelop in his hand, but none of them said a word. He stumbled into the boys’ dormitory where he was staying with the other seventeen year old elementalists. They looked up as he entered and then hastily looked away. Disasters liked to take place around Ethan, especially when he was upset about one thing or another. His bag hit the post of his bed with a loud clunk, his body landing with a “thump” on the firm mattress. The letter was still clutched in his hand, and it poked painfully into his side. After a moment, he stole himself away and slit it open. Most of the other boys who had been hanging around in the dorm left, the ones who stayed ignored him, acting as if the bed were completely empty.
Ethan groaned and rolled over, pressing his face into the cotton material of the pillows. All Ethan was left to do now was join the few boys who stayed in studying, or he could sleep. Yet, it didn’t seem like sleep would come to him anytime soon. He went into the bathroom and filled his water cup to just under the brim. He concentrated hard for the next few hours, but by the time the others returned for bed he could not bend the water in a cup any more than the elementalists could be controlled by humans. He would be better off turning the tap water on than attempting to bend anything to his will. Ethan had fully resigned himself to being the odd one out, and in this, accepted death.
Ethan walked down the halls of the school with a drop in his shoulders. In his mind he thought about how these were the last steps he would ever take down this path again; each breath was one of the last he would ever feel in his lungs. Everything about him, his thoughts, the way he walked, his slow smile, the emotions running like blood through his veins; even the last few heart beats in his chest were the last he would ever feel or remember, if one remembers life after it is gone. After walking for what had seemed to be several miles, Ethan stopped in front of the only metal door of the Academy. One the door were the swirling elemental drawings, each one seeming to engulf the other, sharing its power with friends.
Taking a deep breath Ethan stretched out his hand, clenched it into a fist, and gave three sharp knocks to the door. Slowly the door creaked open, giving way to darkness, the void appeared to be creeping out into the brightly lit hallway, dark shadows penetrating the white walls, invisible hands were pulling at his clothes. All at once he was pulled forward and everything went black, he could no longer see and his body rushed through the twisting hallways inside. It was not a pleasant roller coaster ride, it was horrifying and Ethan wondered if any organs had been left in his body for he felt very empty. His jumbled thoughts slowly began to become a bit clearer as his hair pushed back away from his forehead. To take away a life then you must take away their light, leave them nothing to see by. There really was no hope for the rogue's which existed inside the world of humans and elementalist; neither fully one nor the other, doomed to one fate only.
Adrenaline began to fill his pumping heart, pushing it through his arteries and veins, making his body tense up until it reached such a point in which he could hardly move, though he hardly thought he could against the rushing wind pushing him forward. The darkness was so impenetrable anything could be lurking in the shadows, waiting for just the right moment. It was as if the small noises magnified a hundred fold right then. Was the scuttling noise a poisonous spider about to strike? Was the squeak a mouse with rabies? Or could it even be possible the small hissing was a rattlesnake guarding its supposed territory? It felt as though he had hit a brick wall, but he was still standing and he felt no pain. He had just stopped, his hair crept slowly back down to its usual pattern, the strands pulling painfully a bit as they shifted. Ethan raised a hand to speed up the process, his ears straining to make light of any noise at all.
"Welcome Ethan Silverspoon, we're so glad you could join us." A female's voice reverberated all around him and the lights clicked on.
It was as if someone had just turned the floodlights onto a football field, the room was just as big. As Ethan's gaze accepted the sudden light he began to take in his surroundings. He was surrounded by white walls which reflected the light brightly, the walls upon closer inspection also appeared to be stained with something, perhaps blood? Definitely blood. It was dry and cracking, but never washed from any of the past rogue's, it was blood which showed the society he lived in. Above was a silver box lined with windows, but they were dark, impossible to see the council which was surely hiding behind them. Around the room were a few panels behind which anything could be lurking. In the corners were security cameras which observed the room for anything which might be hidden. The whole room resembled a fancy box for spectators at an anticipated sporting event, but this was no sporting event. This was an arena for inescapable death; death was the only game ever played in the room, the enjoyment factor unknown.
"Isn't there another element for me? Some other chance?" Ethan yelled wildly hoping this was not the end, there had to be something more.
"Why Ethan, that's why you're here isn't it? To find your last chance," The voice replied, it seemed as if the person behind it was laughing, or at least smirking.
"There has to be something more, please, I'm not ready to die." Ethan's last hope was fading; he could feel all the fight and adrenaline draining from his body.
"No one ever is Ethan, but death must come someday and it will not become rampant in the human race. Good-bye Ethan."The panels on the walls slid aside and guns exited mechanically clicking into place, another click loaded the ammunition. Ethan could count six guns ready to shoot. Slowly he pressed himself up against the wall as so many rogues before him, closing his eyes and clamping his jaw he prepared for his death. The guns took careful aim, he could hear them warming up; after a moment they went off, each gun shooting simultaneously. This was the end.
themyronus: Vanessa has made 'amazing' the norme. I didn't want to read this as I am waiting for the finished and polished book to come out. But then I decided to read one chapter for kicks...well hours later I finished what was posted. Fortunately, my memory is not to good and I hope I will read the book wi...
Hawkebat: Playing both Kotor I & II and Swtor I found the story line interesting and it held me until chapter 35 Very good story and plot flow until then, very few technical errors. I felt that the main character was a bit under and over powered, as it fought for balance. The last few chapters felt too f...
ga1984: I really enjoyed it! Characters were deep and plot was pretty complex. A bit on the violent side but it doesnt detract from the story. Very dark but situations make sense. Ends kinda abruptly and later chapters will need some editing work. I'm assuming there's more in the works?
Jasmine Chow: As I read this story, I was reminded some what of Terry Pratchett, especially some descriptions of politics and economics. The sci-fic setting is quite intriguing. Writing style is quite lovely and grew on me slowly. I was also slightly reminded of Mark Twain, especially his book A Connecticut Ya...
Dru83: This is a great story, mainly because of the uniqueness and variety of the characters. There's also several mini story lines occurring underneath the main plot. Some of the plot twists towards the end are unexpected and twist at your heart strings a bit. The punctuation and grammar could use some...
EchoOblivion: I was hooked from start to finish - couldn't put it down! Excellent story, compelling characters, well-built world and just the right amount of mystery. I would definitely recommend if you are a fan of post-apocalyptic sci-fi, with a few zombies-like creatures thrown in for good measure. Can't wa...
Chris Rolfe: BOY!!! I sure love what Aer-Ki Jyr did with this series. IMHO he captured the essence of what stargate is all about. Thru out the Stargate stories Aer-Ki wrote Stevens and John Shepard some of the main characters in his stories are pursued by a corrupt I.O.A.. All the while Stevens is changing in...
Roger A. Fauble: Excellent read, the only thing not to like is that I could only read it at home on my computer. I'm a character reader, I get into the characters, their story, who/what they are. In this story characters are introduced and developed allowing you to really get into them. Next the story is develop...
Tiffany Thomson: This story is not something I would normally pick up and read but I'm so glad I did, I wasn't able to put it down and my husband was yelling at me at 3am to put it down and go to bed (just waited for him to doze back off before picking it back up) I really hope Natalie brings out another book eit...
263Adder: Okay so I adore this story. I only knocked one star off plot for historical inaccuracies because I'm a bit of a stickler for that. The ending broke my heart though, considering you already changed history couldn't you (SPOILER) change it a bit more and have them together!!!! I want an alternative...
Dru83: This is the second or third time I've read this one and I just love it. It has just about everything you could ever want packed into one scifi story. It still has some parts that are a little rough in terms of grammar, punctuation, and word usage, but it's still an awesome story. I love how detai...
FreakyPoet: "you made me laugh, made me cry, both are hard to do. I spent most of the night reading your story, captivated. This is why you get full stars from me. Thanks for the great story!"
Sara Joy Bailey: "Full of depth and life. The plot was thrilling. The author's style flows naturally and the reader can easily slip into the pages of the story. Very well done."