Chapter 1
Back home I sat on the sofa. Yeah, I just sat on the fucking sofa and watched TV. Not watched, the TV was on, but I was thinking. Thinking about the girl, what had he done to her?
Rape her? Kill her? I don't know. I blame myself for not doing anything.
You did what you had to.
No, I didn't.
That wasn't your problem.
No, it wasn't.
You did what you had to.
But I could've done something.
You've done enough.
Enough.
Enough.
Enough.
Enough.
Enough.
Enough.
No, not enough. I could have done something. Called somebody, acted. I could have acted.
No, I couldn't. It's not me. Not now.
You are not Light Crow, not anymore.
I'm not her, I'm Lys. I'm Lys
I am not Light Crow.
I turned the TV on, there was a football match, next. A medical programme, next. A FBI series. Obviously, next.
Nothing, there's nothing.
It's okay, I'll read something.
Sound. I knew that sound. My mobile, where is it? Oh, yeah. Purse.
Mary.
You don't wanna talk to her.
No, I don't. Bye, Mary.
Another call. Missed.
She might be worried.
She'll be fine, not like you, not like us.
Turned off the phone.
Time for a shower.
Water, again, familiar.
Mom, dad, Caroll.
Blood... There's blood. In the shower. Water... Turned red...
No
No
No
Nonononononononono
Not again, please. Blood in my hands... No, please, Caroll...
Help. I need help. She needs me.
Breathe, breathe and act. You are a hero, right? You have to react. Now.
There's nothing. No water, no blood. Just me, crying, in the shower.
Just me. Lys.
Just me.
Just look at yourself in the mirror, what do you see?
Okay, it's okay, it's Lys, it's me.
---
"Do you need a plastic bag?" The woman looked happy, I didn't understand why, I wish I knew how to be as happy as her.
Not an answer.
"Miss? You okay?" The cashier was looking at me with big, green eyes. Waiting patiently for an answer.
Answers
Yeah, I need answers.
"No, thanks."
I gave her a quite unrealistic smile. She didn't believe it. But she was still happy, and returned me a warm smile.
And I come home. Again.
Not home. The new house.
Now it's home.
No, it will never be.
And I'm alone.
Watching TV, nothing new. Better if I go to sleep.
