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The Spider Diaries

By Bianca Marxer All Rights Reserved ©

Mystery / Adventure

Monday, 15 May, 2000: Why?

It’s the first day I’m back at school after -

I can’t even say it out loud, although it’s cast into the stone tombstone that’s resurrected, unlike him, at the head of his ‘forever-bed’. It reads: “Here lies Colby, a good son, friend and man. R.I.P."

I miss him, he was my friend since the day my father left me, he was my neighbor at the time, and he saw me crying to my Da- father begging him to stay and do his job. He didn’t turn to look at me as he shoved his suitcase into the tiny boot of his BMW, got into the drivers seat and drove off, leaving me with tear stained cheeks and a lack of foundation to build a life with. My world tumbled to the ground that day.

My neighbor - who was three years older than me, eight - seemed so grown up to me as he jumped the waist high wall separating our two properties. He pulled me into his arms and he let me weep.

No one’s here this time... HE is gone.

I’m fourteen and he decides to leave me here. Alone.

My mother, who’s probably got work for the paper, has probably left a note on the kitchen counter saying something along the lines of:

“On a job, I gotta get there before the hounds sniff the story out.”

‘The hounds’ is her name for the other reporters from the other newspapers and magazines.

She’s never home for more than a week, and she can be gone for weeks at a time. It got so bad this one time that she was in Vancouver, Canada for two months working on a story about toxic waste dumps.

I love my mother but she doesn’t seem to care if I’m looked after, I spend- used to spend most of my meals and nights at his place... and now, even he’s gone.

I don’t remember my father, he left me when I was about five... I used to get phone calls on my birthday, and even that stopped three years later.

“Spider.” I’m being called. I look up from the book I was pretending to read, I think it’s Lord Of The Rings.

They call me Spider, I’m not to sure why. I’ve come up with two theories:

1. They see me as creepy and small, which is an awful analogy, and spiders - therefore myself included - are misunderstood creatures, and,

2. I’m the perfect wallflower, or not popular or socially adapted...

I’m more partial to the second option but I’ve learned to deal with it...

I still remember who gave me the nickname, he did. And it was for an entirely different reason.

When I was ten - he was thirteen - a spider crawled onto my hand while we were picnicking in his back yard. I lifted my hand and watched with interest as it crawled around for a little bit. Then I replaced my hand on the ground and let it creep away.

He was watching me intently, I noticed. And I asked him what he was staring at me. All he said was “Spider”.

Tears rim my eyes as the person who’s trying to get my attention repeats, “Spider!” a little louder and closer to me.

It’s the girl I sit next to in... I think it’s biology... wait, I don’t take biology. Was it accounting? Probably, and I don’t really care.

“What?!” I snap.

Colby’s funeral was yesterday and I need another week, month, year. Lifetime. To grip this reality.

He’s gone.

“I just wanted to see how you were doing.” she holds her hands up as if she’s walking up to a wild, scared, cornered animal... I feel like that’s what I am.

“I’m fine.” tears threaten again.

“You don’t look fine...” she half whispers. She crouches in front of me and I can see the concern on her face.

Her pale canvas face, with her painted on green eyes and framed by shoulder length flat and dead straight blonde hair, is in my line of vision.

“Please just leave me alone.” I whisper.

She doesn’t move.

“Don’t you get it, I want to be alone. I want to mourn the death of my best and only friend who died because I got drunk at a party and I asked him if he could take me home. If I wasn’t around he’d still be alive. If you want to know how I feel then imagine that if I hadn’t existed he would still be fucking alive. He wouldn’t be sleeping six feet under with broken bones and bruising that didn’t heal because he died. Why did it have to be him? Why not me? I was in the car too! Why didn’t I die?!” I’m hysterical now.

How did I think I could deal with going back to school? The school he went to. Where we used to hang out at lunch time. We used to walk to and from this school every morning and afternoon together.

She looks at me, concerned. Then she sits down beside me and pulls me into her arms. “Shh...” she whispers to me, and I don’t want to hear any of it.

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1. Monday, 15 May, 2000: Why?
Further Recommendations

David Ramati: I can easily identify with the characters as having gone through those terrible times myself. The writer has skillfully brought yet another side of those days to life. A good read which I recommend to everyone.

katskousen03: This book was so good! It was so real and emotional. I loved all the ups and downs and it showed how they were never perfect and fought! One of my favorite books by far!!! This book is one that everyone should read, it’s funny and real and has a bit of romance. The author does a great job showcas...

spatiaangelus : Loved reading this novel. the intricacy of the storyline, the amount of detail and the development of the plot was amazing.Not only is it a unique read, I found it utterly enjoyable and cannot wait to read more

Maja1111: I particularly loved the vivid dialogues. Also, the atmosphere throughout the story is so specific, with a touch of a mystery. Really enjoyed reading it.

larry: I’ m not a professional book reviewer, but this is a good one! I liked it enough to read it non stop!

Sammy Styles: It is one of those stories that keeps you on the hook till the last moment. A roll of pictures were piling up and with continuous moving, it was like I was watching a film. The scenes were dramatic with a bit of every emotion. The story contains every essence of mystery, romance and adventur...

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Deleted User: I love your use of writer's craft and how you use figurative language to enhance your writing. It great how you didn't have any spelling or grammar issues.

Jessica: This is a story that I could not stop reading. It is amazing how everything flowed together and what happened in this book is one that I would not have expected. Very talented author and a great read.

Krupa Kataria: the detailing is really awesome ....the characters, ur plots jst too Awsm ,m waiting for the further chapters please do complete it m really craving for those ones ...great job with words too ..please complete the further parts ...

sujitha nair: What's so distinct about this story was that it could easily be real.Praveena can be your classmate, neighbor or that girl you saw at the coffee shop today. The important decisions she makes and the dilemmas she faces, remind us of our own twisted lives.

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