In the air so calming, so soothing, the air that was moist, a little cold, but felt like that one blowing from the skies above, the heaven above, I was sitting on the edge of a cliff, staring at that one shiny award, a golden trophy in my hand, declaring my success.
The sky that night was not natural, but supernatural. With the half moon glowing bright in the east, enlightening the whole place, and with the stars so much shiny, twinkling, each giving its very own color and brightness, the dark sky seemed nonetheless, a dark sheet of silk filled with diamonds of various sizes in it.
It was a seaside having a vast dark sea with waves rushing here and there, collapsing into each other. The whole place that night, was giving a look of the heaven, so dark and yet, so beautiful. In that soul-soothing night, only I was the one sitting there in my solitude, all alone.
Wearing full black, a 3-piece suit with a blue tie that was gently blowing along with that soul-calming breeze, my face fully shaved, I was 32 years old then but looked more like 28. I really felt that night that I finally succeeded, and it was true that I succeeded but even more than that, I finally achieved what I was looking for my whole life. I achieved peace, the happiness of a soul. I finally found the truth.
The success that I gained was not something so ordinary. For the world, I was just another shining star with a name and some fame but for me, I knew the truth behind every lie 'cause I had been through the worst of mine. I could feel the breeze going through my whole body, touching my soul, taking a part of mine along with it.
Staring at the trophy, the golden trophy in my hands, I was totally lost with no emotions. It felt like inside my head were no and all thoughts at the same time. The thoughts about the life I had spent so far, those twelve years of limitless struggles, those struggles in which I gave up at times, the happy times, the sad times, all of them were rushing through my mind like a stream of water. That was the reason that I had no emotions, no feelings at that time. I didn't know whether to cheer up at my victory or to cry for what I lost through all those years.
In that whooshing breeze so soothing, a very fascinating and warm, a heart-calming voice pierced through the skies above and also gently touched my ears. My eyes became even much wider on hearing that voice ‘cause I was too much familiar with that but today, I had a very new, a very change perspective about that voice. Today, it really felt that He was calling me towards Himself and I was ready to go.
My dry cheeks suddenly became wet and a few drops fell on the trophy that I was holding in my hands. Guess, it was raining but only upon me. When my eyes got blurry and all hazy, then I knew that those drops were not that of rain but were in fact tears, my very own tears, trickling down my cheeks and dripping on that trophy. It was all happening but why was I crying? Were those tears that of my success or that of my sorrows about things that I lost?
The voice that made me burst into tears was actually azan, with the first few words,"Allah-O-Akbar! Allah-O-Akbar! (Allah is the Greatest of all! Allah is the Greatest of all!)” That very smooth and gentle voice was actually coming from a mosque far away on the same cliff.
The mosque was so much magnificent, glittering with lights decorated everywhere in it that it seemed as if a broken star finally ended up there, gently landing down. There was something really strange about azan that day.
Before that, it was but just a soothing breeze but when that voice touched gently my ears, I could also smell some very lively scents all of a sudden that appeared to be that of many different types of flowers containing roses, daffodils, orchids and even more. That voice all the way here, brought the fragrance of flowers, perhaps to ask me to come there.
Azan continued and along with that, my shedding tears continued too. Even if I wanted to, I could hardly control those tears but I let those tears flow. Maybe those tears were not that of my body, but that of my real self, my souls.
With the tears constantly shedding, I smiled, looking at that trophy from the very first moment when I came here, leaving the world behind. That smile meant a lot to me. It was the smile that of my happiness. I then realized that now, I finally achieved success. Now, I finally achieved the truth.