A Lovely School for Ugly Pickpockets

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Grading on a Curve

I was meaning to leave the premises via a back exit, with its brick patio that led into the hedges surrounding the gardens.

As I went, I passed a non-caring security type on my way.

I did not wish to bother to shatter his bliss by stopping to hand over a lady’s emerald necklace, plus then having to take the time trying to explain how It happened to be in my possession!

So the lass would not be getting back her necklace in that fashion.

With a nod, I just walked casually by, a bloke with nothing to hide by all outward appearances.

That was me!

As I went outside, I felt the fresh breeze hit me face, and I breathed it deeply in, finally feeling free of all bother and worries.

I headed directly through the gated opening in the hedges, my final objective was reaching to the far side exit off of the lengthy garden that led off to the place where the red touring auto I drove was parked.

A bit of a walk, but amongst other things, It gave me time to marvel over how easily I was able to work through a situation that I was sure would Fail!

I made my way, slowing down a tad and admiring the flowers and rather ornate fountains that made up this hedged in proper little English garden.

I had one at home myself, behind the cottage, but nothing on this scale, just a brick path amongst some moss rose and lilies, with a rather ancient wrought iron bench overlooking a small stone-built pond in its centre.

I found myself automatically reaching for me pipe and pouch, figuring to contemplate with a long smoke as I walked. But immediately thought the better of it, time was, after all, still decidedly of the essence.

Soon enough, I reached my objective, then for the first time turned to look directly behind me, no one else was about!

I breathed a sigh of relief, it finally was over!

I turned and exited through the back gate…

I approached the curve that lined the parking lot when from another path off to the side I suddenly saw a shadow emerge, detaching itself from behind a tree.


At the same instant, I was made aware of the sound of a quick swish of something silky, and before I could turn about, a very feminine set of fingers gently grasped my arm.

For the briefest part of a second, my mind pictured the young lass in sky blue, the one whose diamond necklace had been lifted as a result of my wager.

My ears met with a soft voice speaking in a lilting Irish accent, whispering cheerily behind me.

“Ta, my love, I’m here!”

I turned and looked again into those rapturing hazel eyes, prettily magnified by her heavy black glasses.

“Ta, here you are indeed !”

I enthusiastically agreed, and pulled her up against me, hugging into her sweet figure, my hands , openly this time, relishing in the splendid feel of her luxuriously soft, shimmery green satin gown, and the warm cuddling figure it encased!!

“Apparently, some turd stole me necklace while we danced !”

she whispered this playfully in my ear...

“ ’ere now! By chance would ya know who the jester was laddie?!”

We broke apart, and as she stood there facing me with a rather smugly coy look about her, one hand on her chest, the other playing along her gown’s barren neckline. I gave her ravishing figure a quick once over before my eyes finally coming to rest once again on the empty neckline of her shiny green coloured gown.

“Indeed, I do “ I admitted, patting me tux outer pocket!

She gazed at me as I admitted my sin, a rather lusting look I knew, and melted for over oh so many times past!

Nice to know that feelings were still strong between us: after a five-year partnership before being married, and now a full 10 years vehemently lost in wedded bliss.

And what a lovely bride she had been… and still is for all that matters….!

I think her thoughts were going on about the same lines as mine, and may have led to us being rather a bit naughty right there an then under the witch elm tree that grew on the green lawn that separated the gardens from the parking lot!…. But!

But, shaking our heads clear in unison, we both turned back to peek into the still empty gardens…

Then we looked at each other directly in the eyes, and chuckling out loud together, proclaimed in sync…

“Let’s get going!”

We forthwith went to the auto, and I helped her slid onto the left side leather passenger inside our small, but quite fast, red coloured touring convertible.

Once she had slithered down, pulled in the loose ends of her long green gown, and nestled into the warm black leather of the seat, I closed her door.

I then promptly hopped in on the right, and fired up the engine into roaring life , and pulled off, leaving the place agreeably, as they say in the olde B.W. movies, in our dust...

About a mile down the road I looked up in the rear mirror, no one was following, but then, really why should they?

Though I was sure that by now there was some unsettling commotion going on back amongst several of the guests at the party we had both so recently left, there was really no way they could have logically connected me, or my wife, to any of it!

Suspicions, of course, maybe raised, but no one there knew enough about either of us to track down and ask!

With that thought in my head, I glanced over at my wife, saying rather with a cheeky tone of voice…

“Luv, we may actually have gotten away with this one!”

I saw my wife winningly smile as she pulled herself from what looked like deep thoughts, not breaking her gaze from the curving road ahead.

I stole another glance down at her clasped hands holding closed over an unseen object tightly within…

Catching my eye, she tenderly chided...

“Hush now dear husband, don’t go ’an spoil this lucky find we worked so hard to acquire.”

At which point she opened her clasped hands so we could both have a look!


I’ll end the chapter here for a bit of a mystery, though I am sure that anyone reading up to this point suspects all too well what we had come away from the party with 😉


Next Up

Chapter 9

Skipping Class, not for a smoke either!

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