Shenanigans at the Poet & Peasant Pub

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Wait, there’s more to this story

And here it is…

Jackie quickly turns a corner before finally allowing sneaking a look back.

Once he is certain that no one follows, for a £1000 is a lot of incentive for a mugging, he darts down a side alleyway.

After a series of turns up, down and doubling back down more alleyways and staying in the shadows of darkened back paths, Jack finally crosses a street and approaches another pub.

He goes inside and orders a shot of irish, watching the doorways, looking about to see if anyone shows an interest in him.

Once he is satisfied that he has not been followed, or noticed, he gulps the shot, throws a coin clattering on the bar(not as clean and shiny as Brutes), and before it stops, has slipped out a back door.

Jack darts down another alleyway leading to a train station.

But instead of going inside, Jackie lights a small black irish pipe and waits a few minutes to get it going, casually looking around.

Then, turning on his heels, he makes his way back down the alley, stopping midway, he heads up a staircase leading to a small row of apartments for let above the back of a block of the stores that front the street leading to the trainyard.

Going to one of the blackened doors, he raps a signal on the door with his knuckles.

A matching rap is heard from inside, and Jack answers with a final signal.

The door is unlocked.

Looking around to make sure no one is lurking in the alleyway below, Jack then turns the knob slowly.

Opening the door with caution, then, with a final look around, steps inside.

There were two occupants in the room, standing on either side of a bed.

Upon the bed lay a satin sheet, covering something that made small lumps from underneath.

Jack is looking upon the very couple that he had greeted at the entrance of the pub known as the Poet and Peasant!

The chap in the hounds-tooth suit had pulled from inside the sleeve of his umbrella a ling thin deadly sharp rapier, and was pointing it nastily towards the door, held up level with Jack’s chest.

The attractive lady in the violet gown was holding a diminutive 2 shot derringer, cocked, she had pulled from neath her left satin glove, it too was pointing at Jack’s chest.

“ ’Ello put away yur ”greeters” mates, it is only meself coming to visit ya after placing life and limb in peril !”

The lass in purple satin Smirks pleasantly as she speaks…

“I don’t know about your life being in peril luv, but I would’ave taken bets against your breaking a few limbs by the way you were teasing the guv’ner who owns that bar. But should have known you would squeak it through, you put up a good job of it!”

The man in tweed grins also, then speaks as he looks at Jack, then down upon the bed as he finished.

“Yes mate, you did the talk pretty well, as usual, and played it to your advantage… and to our advantage as well!!”

Jackie and the pretty lass also look down upon the bed, as he curiously observes.

“We had a good crowd this evening didn’t we!?” And, speaking of advantage, how did we do?”

They all smile as, as the couple standing by the bed put away their weapons.

Then they both grasped the top sheet on the bed and wicked it off.

Exposing a rather impressive collection of assorted wallets small pouches of coins, both gold and silver pocket watches, diamond pins, 3 gold necklaces, a handful of shimmering rings and several glittering ladies bracelets.

Picked the patron’s pockets clean while they were all watching your antics, said Erebus, the man in the houndstooth suit.

“Including this!” triumphantly exclaimed Teddi, the lady in violet, as she delved her hand inside her gowns satin sash, extracting and showing off a rather dazzling diamond and emerald necklace.

Jackie smiled with satisfaction…

“Hoped it was you had spotted that one, red gowned tarty blondes should know better than to wear emeralds, horrible choice with fair skin. Noticed they were gone from her neck as I was leaving, hoped they hadn’t just fallen off!”

The Lass chirped cheerfully as she dangled the glistening necklace…

“Oh, they did fall off, with a little help!”

They all were grinning widely at his point.

Erebus then asked…

“So, speaking of tarts, how did you do with her chums from the casino?”

Jackie patted his pocket…

“Parted them from a £1000 of their winnings, less what I had used as to bait for the bartender!”

Erebus pulled up a heavy satchel from neath the bed, and opened it, more pretty things glittered from inside, along with assorted items that matched those laying on the bed.

It was their collective haul from the 3 nights they had been in town so far.

Teddi came around and helped Erebus start to place the items on the bed inside the satchel.

Jackie stole a look outside, making sure the way was clear.

Stepping back in he said …

“Oui now let’s finish packing it up and split ways. The train is leaving in an hour. Meet at the trains’ pub car for a drink at midnight! Three strangers meeting on a train! That is what we be !”

The three of them grinned as the last of the items from the bed were packed away, the emerald necklace being laid in on top of the rather valuable collection residing in the satchel.

The two looked at Jack, who grinned from ear to ear…

At next town, we will divvy up this lot, and see about adding to it!”

They all nodded in eager agreement.

As Jackie continued to keep an eye outside the door, Erebus and Teddi began to quickly to finish pack up operations.

And at midnight the trio was clinking glasses of ale in celebration, happily nestled into a cozy booth at the Trains bar car!



Author’s note

Thanks to one of my main protagonists, Eileen, who told the joke that made the gist of this story.

She winningly carried out the tale one rather blustery night, inside by a cheery fire at the actual Poet and Peasant Pub, our own dockside hangout.

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