The Hidden Truth
What would I like to know first? There are so many things that I want to know that it’s hard to choose where to start. I guess the best place to start would be the beginning. The whole reason I’m here to find out my past and why my mother gave me up. I shuffle in my seat to get more comfortable before I ask her my first question.
“Well, lets start from the beginning. Why did you give me up?”
I let out and she nods at me. I can see her try and hold the pain of the memories back while she starts with her story. She starts with telling me about when her and my father met and how they were so in love.
Morgana and Guinevere used to be best friends when they were in their young maiden days. They would always go on adventures in the woods and mess around against their parent’s wishes of course. One day they both got themselves into a lot of trouble with some beast in the woods and didn’t know what to do, but of course my mother was hot on her feet and attack the beast while Guinevere stayed behind. Guinevere wasn’t the type who would do the fighting, no; she would summon someone else to do her fighting for her, which is exactly what she did. When my mother was fighting Guinevere was on the sidelines summoning her brother to help them out and he did. As the beast had knocked my mom unconscious Guinevere’s brother, my father, had come and saved the day. Once the beast was defeated my father immediately ran to my mother and healed her. As soon as my mother woke up and looked into his eyes they fell in love and the rest was history.
That is until they found out they were going to have me. Ever since my mother and father had got together Guinevere started to feel left out. My mother would cancel on Guinevere to go out with her brother. Guinevere’s parents started to like Morgana more than Guinevere and eventually everyone Guinevere loved and cared about cut her off. This did not sit well with Guinevere so she turned spiteful. She made it her life goal to make sure something were to ruin my mother and fathers relationship and she did.
One day Guinevere went to visit this ancient witch who was known for her evil spells and was banished to the darkest side of the forest so no one would contact her for anything and no one did. Well that is until Guinevere. She found the lady, told her story, and begged her to help her ruin their relationship. However, Guinevere got more than what she bargained for. The witch promised her that she would do something to ruin her dear old friends life, but Guinevere would have to do something that she may not want to do, however Guinevere was determined she would do anything. The witch then nodded and told her that she will create a prophecy against her dear old friend that will effect her for the rest of her life.
Guinevere told the witch that she would do anything to make sure this prophecy happened. That was until she heard what she had to do to make it happen. Out of the witches mouth came: “You must bring me the heart of what you both love the most” Automatically Guinevere knew what it was that the both shared a strong love for and it broke her heart to do what she did next. Guinevere called my father to meet her deep in the woods for she had something she wanted to give him and he had news that he wanted to share. When they met they hugged each other, and that’s when my father noticed Guinevere’s attitude. He asked her what was wrong, but she just shook her head saying that it will all be over soon and she will be the happiest she has ever been. My father just nodded and went off telling her about how he has the most wonderful news to tell her, but in the middle of his sentence she shoved her hand through his chest and he stopped.
Guinevere didn’t know that my mother was there watching everything that was going on because they were going to surprise her together, but my mother stayed quiet not wanting to blow her cover. As she stayed hidden behind a tall tree, my father was saying his last words while his sister ripped out his heart.
“You’re going to be an aunt.”
Was the last thing he said as his body fell limp at Guinevere’s feet. My mother held back her gasp as you could hear Guinevere’s silent sobs and her quiet apologies. Placing the heart into a bag Guinevere ran back towards the evil witches house while my mother ran to my fathers body. It pained her to know that her child, little unborn me, would grow up without a father and at the same time without an aunt for Morgana would never forgive Guinevere for what she done.
A couple days later they had the funeral for my father and the kingdom was very sad. There were no more parties in the market for random celebrations. There were no more visits to the kingdom unless you had business. Everyone went into a great depression when my father died and my mother decided to keep me a secret from the world especially after she found out what Guinevere did.
A couple months later while my mother was going to do her daily visit to my father she noticed someone standing at the grave. When she got closer she then realized who it was standing at the grave and immediately felt her anger grow throughout her. Guinevere not knowing my mother was behind her continued to tell her apology to her brother that is until she hears a twig snap behind her. Turning her head towards who made the sound her eyes grow wide, but then immediately turned into hatred.
Both Morgana and Guinevere got into a heated argument when Guinevere told my mother everything. My mother was completely appalled at what she was hearing and banned Guinevere from ever stepping foot back into this kingdom again, into their world again, but Guinevere just laughed. She told my mother that she could get rid of her as much as she wanted, but it was me who was going to be her downfall. Guinevere told my mother how I was cursed and I would be the downfall of the kingdom, unless my mother let Guinevere kill me. Of course my mother wouldn’t allow that and banned Guinevere once and for all and sending her to the world I lived in my whole life.
My mother believed that, that solved her problem until I was born and the evil witch appeared at her kingdoms gates wanting to kill me. My mother couldn’t allow that to happen so she did what she thought was best. She wrapped me in a blanket that was sewn just for me and made a necklace that removed what made me special which led to the creation of the tattoo on my shoulder. Writing a quick letter my mother grabbed both me, and the necklace then my mother went into the world where she banned Guinevere. Guinevere didn’t know about giving me up for she was too busy living her own life. Then my mother left me at the doorsteps of Mrs. Taylors place and sold the necklace to a jewel shop to where she tricked the jewel man not to sell the necklace to just anyone. The jewel seller would know when the time is right who to sell the necklace too, and he eventually did selling it to Shayne.
Which leads us to now. She goes on about how she would have never gave me away if it wasn’t for me being in danger. She did this for my protection and only that. It may have hurt her so much she did it because she knew it was what was best. She finally finished telling me why she had to give me away and telling me about what happened to my father and I honestly don’t know how I feel. I know it brings up way more questions that I have for her and instead of giving her any idea of how I felt I just asked her the next question.
“If my father is dead who is her father?”
I asked while pointing to Luna. Morgana looks over to Luna and nods for her to leave. This confuses me, but it isn’t until Morgana starts talking to why she had to leave.
“Luna doesn’t have a father. Two years after I gave you up the kingdom was slowly getting better, but I still was getting threats from the evil witch about how she will take my only child and I could never have another, so I thought having another child would make her leave us alone. So I went to a potion maker and asked them to give me a potion that would make me pregnant and they did. Luna was made through a potion in hopes of the witch leaving me alone. It didn’t work for she would always threaten getting my eldest daughter that was until the witch was dead. By then you were already 16 and Luna 14. I was ecstatic and decided I would go get you and we could be a family, but then I ran into Guinevere. She didn’t recognize me but I recognized her and it made me remember what she did and how you still weren’t safe, so I decided to just wait until you came for me.”
She stopped to take a sip of tea and I asked her how did she know I would come to look for her. She continue to tell me how she was the one who slowly started giving hints. With the dreams and slowly giving back what she took from me. She told me how one night she came to visit me while I was asleep with the necklace and tried to give me everything she took from me, but she couldn’t give it all to me because Mrs. Taylor did her daily night rounds for Percy would always try and sneak out. Morgana was only able to give me a little back which is why I have these episodes every now and then. I’m going through a transition, but since I don’t have everything she took from me these will continue to happen.
“How do we get these to stop?”
“I need the necklace and finally give you back what I took.”
She tells me and I look at her and nod Turning towards Shayne I ask him if he could go get the necklace that was sitting on the counter in my bathroom. He nods and gets up to go get the necklace. While I sat there and waited for him Morgana tells me to ask my next question the one she knows that is on my mind. I look at her as if silently telling her to wait for Shayne to get back and then we will continue. Except she doesn’t seem to listen to me and continues to repeat for me to ask my next question. Her gaze is very intimidating so I ended up giving in.
“Okay fine what did you take from me?”
My powers? I raise my eyebrows at her and shake my head. Questioning her about what she means saying my powers. How do I have powers? I roll my eyes at her and shake my head not bothering to listen to whatever else she wants to or is trying to tell me, but then it hits me. Thinking back to her story about how Guinevere went to a evil witch, she took out my father’s heart with her bare hand, my mother banishing her to a separate world, and my mother taking a potion to make her pregnant. No there is no way that they are real. All that has to be just make believe or is it. It makes sense how when Guinevere was speaking random Latin to me before she made me pass out in pain or bleed until I die.
“No there is no way. I’m not a- they don’t exist!”
“No my dear they and we do exist.”
She says nodding her head at me and smiles. She looks up and sees Shayne slowly walking back to us and looks at me worriedly.
“Would you like to know who and what you are Estrella?”
“What do you mean?”
“Yes that is what I came here for.”
“Well do you want your boyfriend to know as well.”
“He is not my boyfriend”
I tell her as Shayne is coming closer completely oblivious of what we are talking about. She gives me a look as if she could care less what he is to me and for me to just answer the question.
“Well he is going to find out sooner or later might as well tell him now.”
I finish just as Shayne sits down next to me He hands the necklace over to my mother and she inspects it. Nodding her head she takes the necklace and brings it in front of me. She says a few words in Latin that I can’t understand and then blows on the necklace a stream of a teal-ish color fog raised from the necklace and coming towards me. Finally the fog raises up and is sitting right in front of my eyes. Next thing I know it disappears and the necklace looses its pretty color. I look all around for the fog, but couldn’t find it. I immediately ask Morgana where it is but Shayne is the one who answered with inside of me. He tells me how the fog flew straight into my eyes and then asks me I didn’t feel it. I just shake my head at him and then look at Morgana.
“Don’t worry you will feel it soon. It will be just like one of your episodes, but the only thing that will be different is that this one will hurt a lot. It will feel as if your insides are being ripped apart and then slowly sewn back together.”
“What will be happening to me? What was that fog?”
“It was your powers and your final transformation. Your powers will be reconnecting with your body.”
“What do you mean by powers. What powers?”
“The ones I stole from you as a baby.”
I just look at her with confusion written all over my face and her shaking her head. My aunt speaks for the first time since we started this meeting telling my mother to just tell me and stop playing with me. Morgana turns her head towards my aunt and gives her the biggest death glare I have seen in my life and then turns back towards me letting out a huge sigh.
“Just tell me I can handle it I promise.”
I reassure her and she just nods. Deep inside of me I feel a slight pain emerging and I know I’m probably going to have that painful transformation as she had told me about. I try and push the feeling down to try and hear what Morgana is saying, but all I can see is her mouth moving. Its as if my hearing doesn’t work. Then there is a sharp pain in my stomach and I can’t help but move my arm to wrap around my stomach. I look at Morgana and see she is too busy into whatever she is saying to notice, but Shayne does. I turn my head towards him and look at his lips asking me if I’m okay. I just shake my head at him and he puts his hand on my shoulder. The pain seems to subside for a little and my hearing comes back just in time to hear the last thing out of Morgana’s story.
“You’re a witch Estrella”
Then everything went black. She was right that everything would feel like as if it is being ripped apart from me. My limbs feel as if they are slowly pouring out of my body. My ribs feel as if they are being broken piece by piece and my heart feels as if it has been split in half. This is nothing like I have ever felt before and I don’t know if I will make it out this time. I feel like giving up, like as if nothing is even worth fighting for anymore. I can’t handle this! Any of this. I don’t know what is in store for me and I don’t want to know. I just want to give up, so I do.
As soon as I do the pain stops and I am no longer surrounded by darkness. Instead there is this bright white light and I know what that means. Going towards it means death and I will be free of all the pain. Turning away from the bright light I see a single black door with something written on it. I can’t make out what is written on it and start to make my way towards it, but when I do the pain slowly starts to come back. I stop in my place and take a step back and the pain is gone. The more I head towards the light the closer I am to my death, but there is no more pain. The closer I go towards the door the pain is back, but I’m still alive.
I have to decide and quickly.
If I go towards the light I die. There is no more pain. No more shock. No more being in danger because I am a witch. I am free from everything that is bringing me pain. I don’t have to deal with Guinevere or with the awkwardness that is my family. I will be free. No more Morgana, no more Luna, no more of my aunt, and no more putting Shayne in danger.
If I go towards the light and die this will save not only me, but him as well. He can go on with his life without being put into any more danger. He can live his life the way he wants without having the burden of me holding him back. I brought him into all of this mess, but I can bring him out with just a couple of steps.
With that in mind I take a step towards the light, but stop once again and look towards the door with a hidden message on it. What if I chose to live? What is in it for me? If I go to the door and walk through I’ll come back into consciousness. I’ll be back in the mess of finding out I am a witch, that I am in danger, that my whole family is in danger, and that Shayne is in danger. I will have to live with the fact that I am a witch and have to try and live a normal life as if nothing happened and I’m still normal plain Alice, but that isn’t the case. I will have to go through these episodes over and over again with no control over them or will I? Morgana said that the last one is my final transformation. It will be the most painful one of them all and I would have to choose.
This is my choice.
To either accept becoming a witch or to die right now.
I continue walking towards the light reaching my hand out to touch it and accept my fate of dying. Its better for everyone and its better for me. No one will be in danger and there will be no more deaths. Everyone will be free. Right before my hand touches the light I hear voices.
“What is happening?”
That is Shayne’s voice and it stops me dead in my tracks. I look around to see if I can see him, but he is nowhere to be found. I am about to reach for the light again when I hear both voices again.
“She is at the stage where she has to choose.”
“Life or death.”
Morgana knows that this is my choice and I’m making it as they speak. I look back towards the door and question my decision for a quick second, however I’ve made up my mind and reach towards the light again.
“She stopped moving.”
“We are losing her she is choosing death.”
“I can’t it is all up to her.”
“No there has to be a way to save her, she cant die it isn’t her time.”
I can hear Shayne say and Morgana trying to say I’m sorry, but Shayne wont let her. He begins to yell at her telling her to do something to save me. There is no point to save me now I have made up my mind. Looking at the light I see my life slowly flashing before my eyes. Memories from my childhood are playing in front of me as I speak. Then memories of events that just happened. Me finding the letter in Mrs. Taylor’s office and to the moment I first met Shayne. Our day around the town, his gift to me on my birthday and our plane ride. The light is showing me all the good times I had and that I’m leaving behind.
People who I care about and people who care deeply about me and I would be leaving them. I don’t even realize that I’m crying until I feel a tear hit my hand. Also in my hand I feel something warm as if another hand is holding it. Looking at my hand I see nothing but my hand, but when I look towards the light I see Shayne’s tear stained face looking straight at me. Looking back towards my hand I realize it must be Shayne holding my almost dead body’s hand and then I hear his voice.
“Alice if you can hear me right now please rethink your decision. Think of all the things you have yet to experience. All you are thinking of right now is all the bad that has ever happened to you but you need to stop and think of all the good too. You may think that the decision you are making is what is best for all of us, but you don’t know how wrong you are. You may think you are putting me in danger but you aren’t. If anything you have brought my boring life adventure and I couldn’t be more thankful, but if you die in my arms right now that will kill me. I can’t handle you dying. Please come back. Please come back to me for me.”
I knew if anyone could see me at that moment I was a crying mess. His words were so sweet and I could hear the pain in his voice at the thought of loosing me. I didn’t know I meant so much to him and didn’t realize how much he meant to me until that moment. Not only would I die for Shayne, but I would go through this pain over and over again to see that adorable dimple smile on his face. To hear his soft laugh and his deep voice everyday. I would do anything for Shayne, which is why I chose to live for Shayne as well.
I start to walk back towards the door and with each step I feel the pain come back into my body. Every step felt like a needle stabbing into my body bringing forth a pain that I can’t handle, but I’m doing this all for Shayne because I can’t hurt him by dying. My life may be one crazy and dangerous adventure but its one that I will survive because of him. He is my anchor and will always bring me back. I continue to go towards the door and the hidden message slowly becomes less hidden and more clear to me. The message on the door reveals why I would be coming back to life. As when the light showed what I would be leaving behind, the message on the door is showing me what I’m coming back for. I’m finally right in front of the door and the pain is so excruciating that I cant even lift my arm to grab the door handle, but I do. As I place my hand on the doorknob to my life I read the hidden message on the door and my eyes widen while my body goes numb and everything is once again dark.
The pain is gone and I slowly lift my heavy eyelids. Once my eyes are fully open I look around. The first faces I see are my mothers and Shayne’s and they aren’t looking at me. I try to move my body, but it feels as if there is a heavy weight on top of me and I cant move. I try to speak instead, but that doesn’t work as well. It is as if I have been in a dessert for years with no water and my mouth is so dry if I talk air just comes out. I cant let them know I am alive and the hurts me. My mother has just lost the daughter she just got back and her face shows exactly that as she looks off in the distance. Shayne’s head is down in one of his hands as the other is holding my hand. His facial expression shows that of pain and that breaks my heart, but it also gives me the strength to squeeze his hand.
His head slowly raises as he looks at me and smiles.
“You came back to me.”
At the sound of Shayne’s voice my mother turns her head to look at me. Immediately a smile appears on her face and she leans down to kiss my forehead all while whispering thank god. She then continues to ask me how I am feeling and if I can talk. With my lack of answering she assumes that I cant and makes a blinking game out of it. Once for yes and twice for no.
“It’s normal for you to feel like this it should wear off in an hour so don’t worry until then I’ll have Shayne bring you to your room and you just rest.”
She gets up and walks away not before turning towards Shayne telling him not to leave my side. He tells her that he wasn’t going to and then asked her what she was going to do. I was actually quite interested in that as well, so I take my eyes away from Shayne and bring them towards her. She just tells us that she has to go put up a new barrier since the other one was kind of broken. Shayne just nods and turns to me slowly lifting me up bridal style and starts walking towards my room. He then lays me on the bed and sits next to me.
We sit in a comfortable silence until he decides to break it.
“You know you scared me half to death. I really thought I was going to lose you for good this time. Can you promise me not to do that again.”
I look at him and blink twice because honestly with my life I cant promise him that. I can promise him that I will try not to but there is no guarantee. He looks at me runs a hand through his hair and sighs.
“I know, I know, it’s just. Ugh, I was scared and I have never been so scared then I was to see your lifeless body laying there in front of me and there was nothing I could do about it, but wait for you to make a decision hoping that it was the better one. When your mother told me we were loosing you I knew it was because you thought it would be better to leave, so we could move on but that’s the thing. If I lost you I wouldn’t have been able to move on.”
He finishes and I move my hand to take his. Feeling my strength slowly come back to me I look at him.
“I wont leave you not anytime soon anyway.”
He whispers a good and we lay there until we both fall asleep. For once it is a dreamless sleep for me and I couldn’t be more happier. The last thing I would need is some haunting dream trying to tell me something that I need to figure out. I’m already dealing with enough stress and moments like this, peaceful, don’t come that often and when they do they don’t last long. For example, this one lasted maybe a hour. I can feel my body officially recharged and then a boom and a shake of the whole house awakened me. Immediately both Shayne and I get up quickly and run into the living room where I see it is completely trashed. Luna is passed out next to the window and my aunt is nowhere to be found. The couches are completely flipped upside down and the chandelier is shattered all over the floor. There is blood splattered on the walls and pictures crooked and shattered. Right in the middle of all of it I see a blood red cape and immediately feel my blood boil.