A Little Closer
This morning was different then all the rest. I woke up feeling strange as if something wasn’t right or something bad was about to happen. Of course this could just be because of the nerves for this dinner with my supposedly Aunt, but I couldn’t help feeling like today wasn’t going to go as planned. Deciding to shake those thoughts out of my head I slipped out of bed. Careful not to wake up Shayne and headed towards the bathroom. When I get there I turn the shower on just to let the hot water run to help clear my thoughts and senses.
Not knowing what to expect today is really getting to me and also me not having any dreams lately. You would think that I would be glad to not be having these dreams anymore, but at the same time I just don’t know. These dreams are what lead me closer to my mother and now that I’m getting closer they are starting to fade. That’s supposed to be a good thing right? Then how come it feels wrong like my dreams should be getting stronger, not weaker.
Speaking of stronger. These episodes I have been having they are getting stronger. I tend to have one either once or twice a day each worse than the one before. I actually had one in the middle of the night last night. Poor Shayne waking up in a heart attack thinking I was dying and honestly I thought I was. It was worse than the one at the airport. My lungs felt like they closed completely and those gasps of air that I was actually able to take in were as if life was saying “Enjoy it while you can”. Shayne also said that my eyes were going back and forth between a pale baby blue to a piercing aqua like color. My body was on fire that even the slightest touch of someone else’s skin would burn them. Then just as the pain gets to be its worse its gone and there is nothing but darkness surrounding me.
Darkness. That darkness that surrounds me though I find comfort in. It’s crazy I know, but that darkness is keeping me in this shell. This protective barrier that no pain could ever get in, except deep down inside I know that the darkness surrounding me that I take much comfort in is actually all my pain surrounding me. I’m just to numb to feel it and I take comfort in that numbness. Which is almost how I feel right now. With the hot vapors surrounding me I feel at peace like nothing can harm me. Nothing can take me away from this serenity. I feel the comfort surround me once again.
Getting up I look to see who is calling my name, but I see no one. Assuming it is Shayne I turn off the water and head out towards the bathroom, however when I open the door I do not see our hotel room. Nope I’m in this fancy room as if I was walking into a palace. The room looks fit for a queen and straight ahead there is one sitting there. She looks up as if sensing my presence and a small smile appears on her face.
She whispers something that I can barely make out to be ‘it worked’ when she gets up and in a second is standing in front of me. That’s when I get a better view of her. She is absolutely stunning. Her long gorgeous black hair running down her side topped off with a black hat. Her skin very pale, but completely flawless. Her eyes a gorgeous brown color that you could get lost in. I couldn’t help but stare at her in all her glory. Her black gown draping down to the floor while the collar brings out her neck. You can tell she is of royalty and I immediately feel myself curtsey in her presence. Which she immediately makes me stand from.
I look up at her and see her admiring me, as I was her just a moment ago. We haven’t said a word to each other, yet I feel like we have already said so much. I was about to open my mouth and speak when she beats me to it.
“I didn’t think it would actually work.”
“That what would actually work?”
I ask her however she doesn’t reply instead walks closer to me and places her hands on my cheeks. I feel a sense of warmth and comfort as her hands rest at their position. I don’t know who this lady is or what connection she has to me, but I can tell that our connection is strong and I have to know who she is.
“Who are you?”
“Not worry about that dear, you will find out soon enough. I must return you back now, but I really had to see you. Your power is getting strong which is why this was able to work and for that I am proud. Don’t worry my dear, you will find your way to me and I will be there with open arms.”
She finishes and once again places her hand on my cheek, but this time it isn’t comforting. It’s the exact opposite I feel an excruciating burn where her hand is. My lungs feel like they are being sucked dry and the air is becoming limited. I try and gasp, but it is no use there is no air coming in. Then the pain starts to travel and it feel as if someone has brought a knife into my stomach and is slowing twisting it just to bring me pain. The comfort that hand on my cheek once brought now feels as if it is literally sucking the life out of me.
Looking up at the lady I see she is gone and a girl with long blonde hair and bright red eyes staring at me with a wicked smile. I try to speak to ask her who she is and why she is doing this however nothing comes out. I feel as if I even try and speak I will die on the spot, so instead I just plead with my eyes.
“Pathetic little girl, your power maybe growing, but you are still very weak. Just be sure to watch your back because next time I won’t be so nice.”
She says and let’s go of my face. I feel all the air that I was trying to save rush back to me and the pain of the knife now being sooth back to health. Looking at her I was about to ask her who she was until I heard my name being called. Turning towards the sound I see Shayne standing they’re looking at me with that same look of concern on his face. The blonde lady follows my gaze and slightly snickers.
“How stupid could you be little girl. Showing me your weakness. Giving your heart to this boy is not only your greatest weakness, but will also be your downfall. You don’t know it yet, but I am your worst nightmare and I have just found a way to make this dream a reality.”
She says and flicks her wrist sending Shayne flying to the wall behind him. I scream out his name but it is as if he cannot hear me. The blonde girl has now made her way over to Shayne grabbing him by the neck. Shayne looks over to me with a plea in his eyes, but there is nothing I could do. I was frozen in my spot.
“Such a shame too, he was a pretty one. Maybe I’ll break you by breaking him.”
She says while squeezing his neck tighter. I scream his name again and this time run towards him. Except after my first step I feel myself being flung across the room. Hitting my head against the wall I can feel a fresh cut forming on my forehead. Looking up I meet with Shayne’s gaze and he gives me a small smile.
“Alice. Wake up. Please wake up.”
With a huge gasp of air I feel myself startle awake. Looking around I see that I am still in the bathroom, however I am now on the bathroom floor. The shower is still running and you can see the steam in the room, which is making the room hot and damp. Turning my head slightly I see Shayne looking at me wide eyed. His hair appears to be wet. Most likely from all the steam in here. When he sees that my eyes are open he lets out a sigh of relief and pulls me in for a hug. I awkwardly return the hug and with a raspy voice asked what happened.
He looks at me and immediately tells me that he woke up to gasping and crying and then he heard me scream his name. When he ran over to check on me he saw that I was standing there staring straight at him, but he said as if my eyes were hollow and I wasn’t really there. He then told me how he called my name and I ended up screaming his again and then fell out of nowhere bumping my head against the bathroom counter and falling on the floor. That’s where he ran to me and begged me to wake up, and then I did.
Looking at him in completely shock I couldn’t believe that what happened to me in my dream happened to me outside of my dream. Trying to get the thought of what just happened out of my head I asked Shayne to help me up. He gladly agrees and helps me over to the counter where he lifted me up and sat me down. Telling me not to move while he got the first aid kit he brought with him. Nodding my head I sit there and wait for him to get back. When he does I sit there and let him play doctor. He gets some rubbing alcohol and brings it to my forehead. I wince at the slight sting and he tells me sorry. Waving him off he starts to ask me what happened while I was in that sort of trance. I tell him everything that happened in my dream. About both girls and he nods telling me how freaky that is.
He finally finishes with my cut and I am able to leave the bathroom to get ready for today. Picking out my outfit I decided to go comfy. With just some black jeans and a plaid button up shirt leaving my hair down I grab a bandana and tie it around as if it were a headband. Once I’m finished my phone rings and I go to answer it. She tells me all the details about today and telling us to meet her at this restaurant. I agree with it and then tell Shayne when he comes out of the bathroom.
Both never hearing of this restaurant we decided to Google it. Of course it is a fancy restaurant so I have to change my outfit, but that is when I realized I didn’t bring anything fancy to wear. Shayne then suggests we go out in town and buy an outfit. Nodding we get up to leave when we hear a knock at the door. Since I was still scared of what happened in my trance dream thing Shayne went to answer it. Noticing that no one was at the door Shayne was about to close it when I noticed something on the floor. Telling Shayne he picks it up and looks at the card. It looked to be a gift for someone.
“It’s for you.”
He says and hands me the box. Nodding I place it on the bed terrified to open it. With shaking hands I grabbed the card and read it aloud.
“Just thought you might want something to wear tonight. Clarissa”
I open the box and see a gorgeous long black red gown and some red pumps to match it. Grabbing the dress I can feel the silky material underneath my fingers and I can tell this dress was expensive. Looking over at Shayne he just shrugs his shoulders and motions for me to go get ready since we are supposed to meet her in two hours. I nod taking the dress in with me to the bathroom. I take a nice quick shower and then slip into the gown. It feels nice against my skin and I feel gorgeous. I decided to curl my hair and keep my eye makeup simple with some eyeliner and mascara. My lips I go bold and find a red color to match this dress. Once I was down I slid my feet into the pumps and look at myself completely. I couldn’t even recognize myself and Clarissa got my size to the tee. It fits perfectly where it needs to yet is still presentable.
I make my way out of the bathroom to Shayne telling me that he decided to match his tie with my dress. Giving him a small okay I make my way to grab my purse and asked him how I looked. Shayne stops what he is doing and looks up over to me. He is completely shocked. His mouth is slightly dropped and he looks as if he is in a trance. Snapping my fingers he comes back to reality and clears his throat.
“You look gorgeous.”
I tell him and he offers me his arm. I gladly take it and we make our way towards the restaurant. Our ride there was filled with what ifs and where do we think this dinner is going to lead us, however, neither of us could come to a conclusion, so we just decided to see where this takes us. Arriving at the restaurant didn’t take long for it was actually very close to the hotel and for that we were grateful just in case dinner took longer than expected. When we walked inside we were immediately greeted with the smiling face of my aunt. She complimented both Shayne and I and told me how she knew that dress would look good on me just like it did my mother.
“This was my mother’s dress?”
She nods her head and tells me how I look exactly like her when she was my age. At this I gave a small smile and run my hand down the dress. My mother’s dress. I couldn’t believe it. I was actually wearing something of my mothers, something borrowed like normal girls with moms did. I never thought something like this would ever happen. Then again I never expected me to go on a quest to find my mother either but here we are. Clarissa ends up showing us our table and we take a seat.
The night starts off with some small talk between each of us and then it wasn’t until our actual entrees arrived that we got to the questions. Clarissa told me that I could ask her anything I wanted to know about what is going on. I nodded and tried to think of a question. It was so hard. I had so many questions I wanted to ask, but couldn’t figure out which one I should start off with. I decided to go easy and work my way up to the harder ones.
“Does my mom live out here too?”
Clarissa nods and starts going off about how my mother doesn’t live far from here. About a three-day walk through the forest and we should be there. She told me how my mom likes to be a very secluded person so she picked a nice place in the forest one where no roads lead to so I couldn’t even drive there if I wanted to. I nod at her and then take a small bite of my food wondering what should be my next question. That’s when I realized throughout this whole trip I never really thought about my father or his part in any of this.
“What about my father?”
“That’s a conversation for your mother dear I don’t know.”
She tells me with a small smile. I nod and start to ask her other small questions such as why she doesn’t live with my mom. How did she end up working in a witchcraft store? If my mom works there too. Most of the answers didn’t really help me to understand my mother or what is wrong with me so I decided to hit her with the harder questions.
“Can you take me to see my mother?”
“Why no I cannot take you personally, but your mother said you are welcome to come see her. I can tell you the way, but that is all.”
“Okay…Can you tell me what is wrong with me?”
“What do you mean?”
I told her what I meant. Starting from the dreams, to the freaky eye changing, to the faints, and all the way to this morning with the trance. I also told her what all my dreams are about and how I feel when going through these changes or through these trances. How I feel like I’m dying and can’t breathe and how it always ends in me fainting. She nods her head a couple of times while I tell her and she nervously chews her food. I can tell she wants to change topics or find the perfect answer to tell me. Which most likely to be fake since she is hesitant to tell me in the first place. I think Shayne notices this too because the moment she looks at the desert menu still ignoring my questioning he leans over to me.
“If she doesn’t answer it how you want her to remember we are not here for her, but for your mom she can always explain better.”
I look over to him and nod at him. He is right the reason I came here is to find my mother and to ask her the questions I have for her. However, my aunt surprises me by answering and I can tell it’s truthfully.
“Alice…there are things going on with you that cannot be explained without your mother. She knows more about you and what is going on with you then I can tell you. I really wish I could tell you sweetie but I do believe that is something your mom should talk to you about. I cannot tell you much but the reason you are having these dreams and trances and the reason your mother left you are connected, so you must speak with her to get the full story. For I can only tell you parts that won’t make any sense to you. Also I don’t feel it appropriate to talk about that in such a public manner. So go seek out your mother have her tell you everything and then if you still have questions she cannot answer that I can I’ll be glad to answer them for you. Deal?”
“Deal. Then Shayne we leave tomorrow.”
I tell him and he just nods and continues to eat his food. Our desert comes not much later and we sit there and talk about my life at the time. Clarissa asks me questions about what happened throughout my life and about the orphanage I go to. She also asks how Shayne and I met and how she still believes that even though we may not agree we will be together one day. Shayne and I both just slightly chuckle and nod our heads so she would drop the subject, however, she decided she liked the topic of Shayne and continues to ask about him and the way we met.
“Well it seems you two just met not too long ago. And you agreed to come on this trip with her…why?”
“Well I knew that I didn’t know her very well so when she first asked me I was a little hesitant, but I took the time to think about it and get to know her more. Then when I found out why she wanted to go on this trip so bad I knew saying yes was the right thing. Plus I rather have someone go with her then her trying this on her own.”
“That is true, but it is strange that you met right before she decided to leave is it not?”
“Yea maybe it was destiny?”
Shayne said with a shrug when Clarissa leaned in. Looking Shayne straight in the eyes.
“What is your last
“It’s Moore why?”
She repeated and flew back to her seat. Her face went surprised and she became as pale as a ghost. I asked her if she was okay but she just brushed it off calling for our waiter and paying. We tried to offer her money but she refused saying we were family and also for me to consider it a birthday present. I nod and she immediately excuses herself.
“I had a great time. I’m sorry I could not answer any of your questions the way you wanted me too but here take this. Its you mothers address find her and ask her everything your little heart desires. I must be going now. Be sure to visit soon. Goodnight Estrella. Goodnight Shayne.”
I tried to correct her but before I could she was out of the restaurant using one of her puff magic balls to do a disappearing act. She is really into this whole witchy thing and takes it everywhere she goes doesn’t she. Anyway I looked over to Shayne who had already got out of the booth and extended his hand towards me. I gladly accept it and we make our way back to the cab so we can head back to the hotel.
I’m upset that my questions didn’t get answered the way they were supposed to, but I’m glad Shayne reminded me the real reason I’m here. To find my mom and ask her the questions and if she doesn’t have the answers I’m looking for then this whole trip was a waste and I’m sorry for ever dragging Shayne into this, but I needed to know. I need some type of closure even if it isn’t the one I wanted I need it.
We arrive back at the hotel and make our way to the room. We have both been silent the whole trip here and now it only makes this awkward as we ride the elevator. I take this time to admire him without him noticing. He is wearing some black dress pants with a silky looking grey top. His tie is a red color to match my dress and his hair is slicked back. He is very handsome and any girl would be lucky to have him. He is also very kind, protective, funny, and just a down to earth person. Despite his rich appearance you would have never known that he was rich for his attitude is nothing of the way the rich people I met have been. He is different a good different.
While looking at him I start to look at his features. He looks very tired as if this night has worn him out, which I am right there with him, but it also looks as if something else is wearing him out that he just isn’t sharing yet. I bet it has something to do with his parents. I just hope that one day he will open up to me and I won’t have this feeling that he is hiding a part of himself from me. For I want to get to know the real Shayne every bit and part of him for although h I may feel safe around him it’s his past I don’t feel safe around. Especially a past that can make a sweet guy like him turn cold and heartless at the mention of it. He is broken inside and I want to help fix him.
Giving your heart to this boy is not only your greatest weakness, but will also be your downfall.
I remember the words from what I guess was a dream so clearly. Is what she said true? Am I starting to give Shayne my heart? I was so lost in thought that I didn’t even realize the elevator opened until Shayne called my name. Giving a small smile I make my way out of the elevator to our room.
Thing about it maybe it isn’t such a bad thing. She may have said it was but who knows what that could have meant. There is also the way my aunt acted when she found out Shayne’s last name. I wonder if he is a part of this more than I know of. Maybe it wasn’t coincidence that he came to the orphanage right around the time I was ready to go on this wild adventure. Maybe this was destiny and I’m walking right into where I am supposed to be or into my biggest trap yet.
“Alice is something wrong?”
Shayne asks me and I shake my head.
“No I was just disappointed that my questions didn’t get answered the way Ii wanted them to tonight. I mean I feel like we are getting closer and closer, but at the same time I feel like we are back at the beginning of me just finding some stupid letter.”
I tell him and he sighs walking over to me and wrapping me in his arms for a hug. Giving into his hug I bury my face in his shirt and breathe in his scent. He is something I can find comfort in. He is someone who I can trust with my life. He is someone who even though he doesn’t know me, knows me the best.
“I know tonight didn’t go as planned, but hey look at the bright side we have your mothers address and we are heading over there first thing tomorrow morning. We are getting closer to our end goal and we are succeeding. So even though you may think we are still at the beginning you must look at it this way. You have much more than the stupid letter, you have found your aunt the first person in your real family. You have found your family and you know now that your mother is alive and well. If I remember correctly that letter didn’t tell you that you had an aunt or whether or not your mother was still alive or not. You may think we aren’t getting anywhere because the major questions you have haven’t been answered, but we are so much farther then when I caught you finding that letter.”
Shayne tells me while lifting my chin gently to have me looking at him. At the end of all that he gives me a smile and I couldn’t help, but to send one right back at him. He is right I may not have the questions I want answered, but I do have more answer then what I came here with. Shayne ends up pulling away and going over to his suitcase to get out his pjs.
Maybe. Just maybe.
He is someone I’m giving my heart to.