Learning To Love Again

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Chapter 3

David tried to fix me about a million times and he gets frustrated because he has a twenty-minute talk to with me then Anna-Grace and Lincoln ruin it in 5 seconds by making me feel low again it’s like they knew exactly what to do or say to sabotage what David helped me with. David is fifteen almost sixteen and I was explained that when you are sixteen you have a very big decision that was either to stay with me and my siblings or go home with mom and dad. David picked to go home and Lincoln’s eyes filled with wonder like he was next or something, In reality, he was only ten years old he had six years. It turned out we went “home” that same month. My family went to counseling to make sure the kids were alright by alright meaning we were still breathing so we were alright but I was scarred but I kept that inside also with all my insecurities and made myself “forget” that I had insecurities.I didn’t adjust because I went from having someone looking at me and all my flaws to people that didn’t see them. We were coming back “home” after a counseling session Then out of nowhere me , Anna-Grace and Lincoln were taken from the place I didn’t call home. My insecurities came out at me in rapid succession and the hour car ride I will never forget I honestly felt like I was going to be killed. I thought that because I was taken by people I didn’t know and the only people that I knew were my two older siblings. When we left that temporary home Anna-Grace and Lincoln changed, in my opinion, they changed their tone around me because they knew they had to make me feel like everything was the same but I didn’t buy their tone. When the van pulled up at a house that seemed alright. Me ,Anna-Grace and Lincoln were given a five-second tour and paige seemed welcoming but when the social worker left the mask washed off and I was panicking but did I want her to notice of course not. I didn’t want her to notice my panicking on the inside because I didn’t want to risk getting possibly abused for giving an opinion because I don’t think my opinion matters to someone that can possibly beat me and or my siblings. The first few days were torture honestly being in a basement for about ten hours gets boring fast because there was only a bin of toys and half of them were either broken or I was too scared to touch them because I don’t know what paige and Dylan might do to me. I was afraid that I hid it and didn’t let anyone know because I might get hit for showing emotion and then hurt the other.

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