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Chapter 10: The Dream about dad

Quinn’s POV

As I traveled inside of Mira’s thoughts and dreams, I noticed that her state of mind was at peace. I never thought going inside of people’s thoughts & dreams would be possible to do, but all I need to do…

“Master! For goddess’s sake… at least wait for me!” Fenrir…

“I’m sorry about that Fenrir!”

“Do you even know what you are doing? You can accidentally kill her by just waltzing into her dreams and thoughts!”

“I didn’t know.” I took a deep breath.

“Watch me, Master!” He stood in front of me, his eyes glow blue. “Lady Mira!”

“Fenrir? What are you doing in my thoughts?” Fenrir motion me to follow his lead. I concrete on the wavelength of her mind… I felt I can touch her mind.

“Mira!” She is looking around.

“Quinn?” Okay…

“Going inside my father’s mind. I’ll come right back afterwards.” I went back inside of my father’s mind. Waited for Fenrir to catch up to me, which it didn’t take him long enough to do so.

The truth behind my father

“Are you ready, Master? I will teach you to touch the minds of others to learn about the past and present.”


“Follow me.”

As I follow Fenrir, I notice a replica of Great Rock inside of my father’s mind and the people that lived inside of it. He showed how to explore the memories of people by touching an object or replica to gaze into the memories of said individuals. Also, I learned I can implant idea or suggestions as well or induce a coma if I am not careful.

Time to put it into practice! I touched a replica of one of my father’s betas. I can see a memory.

“Are you fucking kidding me?!” He grabbed a doctor by the throat. “What do you mean he has no wolf inside of him?!!”

“I am telling the truth, Alpha! He had no wolf inside of him and we have done a lot of tests!”

“He will be fine.” Mother… “I don’t believe in destiny or in these prophecies! He will be a healthy baby boy one of these days.”

“Selene…” That when my father was kinder back then…

When I saw replica one of the woman who is carrying a bucket of fish. I touched the bucket to look into another memory.

“We have spoken, Alpha Oxdin. The child is an Ill-Omen for the clan and he will be born without a wolf. He is to be left to the Goddess.”

“Abandoned my child? I am the Alpha of this clan and I decided when…” The woman who was wearing a dark cloth with greyish hair walked to him. That is the clan sayer, prophets that can foretold any future with each Lycan, determined if the fates chose them for greatness or struggle.

“The child will be a burden to you and your family. We have suggested that you leave him to the Goddess or offer him to another family.” My father… had tears in his eyes when they suggested this.

“My son will be a fierce Lycan one of these days and he will bring honor to his family!” Another woman with her eyes closed off, step forward.

“With all due respect, Alpha… He will struggle for the rest of his life, not bring greatness to your clan. Therefore, we suggested…” That when my father transformed and he attacked the sayers.

I watched in gory detail on how my father dealt with them… He strangled one woman in his grim grip. The pressure of it was enough to force her to open her eyes, which my father savagely tore her throat out.

A man who tried to run from the imposing alpha. My father swiftly cut his escape and tore at his beating heart. The woman reel in terror of what my father will do to her.

The memory ended…

“Master! Come, look.” I went over to where the Pwyll’s replica is at. “Touch him!”

As I touched my brother, I saw… Mother!

Regrets I will never forget

“Oxdin! Stop this now!” My father was holding… me, a mewling baby.

“I know what needs to be done, my love. My son should not be among our people.”

“Father! You don’t know that” Pwyll? He had freckles on his face when he was younger. “He won’t survive in the cold.”

“Better than raise him among the clan where they can sniff his weakness and be at their mercy!”

“Where strength matter, husband? He is our son! And you think it is doing him a favor?! All because you went ahead drove away the sayers?” My father let a tear fall. My mother realized what he has done. “You killed them, didn’t you?”

“You didn’t even believe their prophecies! Why are the fuck are you defending them?”

“I mean, why did you kill some of their members and drove the rest away?” My mother had a fierce gaze. My father realized that there was no stopping once she gets going.

“I allowed that woman and her group to walk away under the threat of death.”

“Damn it, Oxdin! Yes, I don’t believe in destiny or prophecy. I didn’t want to you kill them!”

“ENOUGH!” He shouted in his commanding voice, it only incensed my mother more.

“NO, YOU ENOUGH!” She walks up to him with them seem poised to kill each other. Both Tilda and Pwyll had to step in and break them up.

“Mom and dad, please stop! Please, father.” Tilda had tears in her eyes. “Let little brother stay among the clan. I promise he will get stronger.”

“Stay out of this…”

“Father, I will never forgive you if you abandon him here. Please, let him live.”

“If you abandoned our son here in this place, Oxdin…” She transformed in front of our father. Her fur was darker than most in our clan, and her claws were very sharp.

“You would fight me, my luna?” He sets me down on the tree stump and transformed as well.

“I will.” As she enters her battle stance, mother would stand for what she believes in.

When my father saw that my mother will die fighting to make sure that her family stays together, he… couldn’t bring himself to fight her, he wanted to save me from the pain of living of a hard and difficult life.

He picked me up from the tree stump and carried me back to the village. There, he put me back in the crib and played with my nose for a bit.

“Be strong, Quinn. Prove to my clan that you can be strong someday. Goddess willing, I am taking a terrible risk in doing so.” Father…

“Master!” I saw… Replica of my father!

I sprinted toward the replica, but it transformed in front of me, forcing me to move faster toward it. When I arrived, the replica stopped near…

“Master?” he stopped when he saw a replica of my father.

“Father or are you…?”

“I am only a fragment of his memory. I have been watching you for a long time, boy.” That is not the father I know, but… “You wondered why I know who you are, son? Why a replica like me is speaking to you?”

“I know what happened in the past.” The replica teleports in front of me.

“Take my hand, you don’t know everything that you think you know.” I raised an eyebrow at this.

“What? No yelling that I am worthless or pathetic?! And you expect to trust you, a replica of my father?” I walked away. I can’t do this…

“Master, if the replica is telling you the truth, do you want to know why your father treated you this way?”

“He didn’t care about me… And he nearly abandoned me in the cold as well, trying to kill me in the past.”

“There is a reason he continued raising you when he didn’t have to. If you don’t hear the truth, you’ll never get over it, it will practically consume you.” Fenrir stood firm. “If he didn’t care, he would have abandoned you and it was Pwyll, Tilda and your mother who talked him out of it.” I turned back to the replica of my father.

The replica is nothing like the father I know… it’s patient, understanding, and I feel it’s not trying to hide anything from me. I need to know the truth. I won’t get another chance if I leave now.

I took the replica by the hands and I saw a memory of me… Lying on a hospital bed.

The Replica reveals

“My son…” He held me by my hand… That’s when I survived that rogue’s attack back then. “I am sorry that you are not strong enough… I should have been a better father to you. You are going to be 18 in a couple years now… You haven’t gain the power to transform, you’re still the sickly boy that I love and know. Hell, you even tried to leave the clan.”

I say nothing, but the replica stood by my side during that time.

“My boy, you need to get stronger now. The clan… The clan will not tolerate your weakness any longer. If you can’t transform by the time you turn 18, I would have no choice…” Father… I “You understand what this means for you? I would have to exile my flesh and blood and I know if Selene is here now… she would chew me out for following tradition and claw my face out right by now.” He gets up from where I am at.

My father… he cared about me? He knew…

“That is not all, my boy!” The replica shows me another memory.

“Pwyll!” My father is calling out for Pwyll, which he came from his office.

“Father? What are you doing here? Shouldn’t you be at the convention by now?” He confused my father would be here.

“You have some time before I go?” They headed to a meeting room with tea and coffee as well, having pastries being set up.

“Is it about Quinn? You know you treated him…”

“I KNOW THAT!” Pwyll shocked when father yelled at him. “Can’t get it out of my head, Pwyll. I may never see my flesh and blood again. He will never forgive me after…”

“Why? Why are you bringing this up, father? Quinn is the one you should apologize to, not me!”

“That is why I came to you, Pwyll. Please listen to me.”

“Last time I recall, my ears are still working and I am a shoulder for people to cry on.”

I learned my father has regretted every moment that I was being raised in the clan. On my 18th birthday before the announcement, he actually intends for me to leave the clan and take me to Windmill, one of the human cities. The plan failed the moment when I opened my mouth against my father.

Had I not, would have Angharad still choose me as her successor, I wouldn’t have met the good people in mourning ridge then. He had a lot of much guilt for what he has done to me…

All of this time, I was trying to please him… I was trying to become stronger so people wouldn’t view me as weak. I was a fool… In fact, my father had wanted me to become myself, to find my strength. The beatings, the late sessions with him, allowing the clan to do terrible things to me…

“You knew Reagan was beating him to an inch of his life? And you did nothing?! Quinn could have died, father!”

“My son had a wolf.” The news was enough to make Pwyll spit out his coffee. “My son must have a wolf inside of him all this time. How else would he had survived the beatings or how your big brother…”

“How long did you know this?”

“It wasn’t until after his exile that I noticed he had life still in him. If he was human…”

“Then it must have been his wolf that was allowing him to survive these years of hell.” I… I had a wolf inside me? So I am a Lycan… But why is it not awaking up?

“I should have known, my son. My rage has blinded me, not realizing it was inside of him all this time.”

“What are doing to do, father? Beg him to come home? YOU EXILED HIM, REMEMBER?!” Man, even Pwyll has his limits.

“Yeah… I did.” He sets his coffee on the table. “After I return from the convention, I will do two things.”

“I am aware you will retire for one.”

“I asked your sister if she would become Alpha instead of your brother, Reagan-”

“Absolutely not, father! Don’t even go there with me. I cannot be alpha.” Pwyll cut him off before he can finish that sentence. My father got a laugh out of that.

“At least, you are not a spineless man, boy. You read books and you still can defend yourself.” He shook that thought of out of his head. “But no, I am not asking you to be Alpha. The second thing is that I will find your little brother, Quinn. I’ll move through the forests and mountains If I have to!”

“Do you know where to find him, father? Angharad and Mira didn’t tell me where they were going before they left.”

He grabs his backpack and straight toward the door, not before sparing a glance at Pwyll. “If I don’t get back and I cannot tell him myself… Tell him: I’m sorry for all the hell I’ve given you, I wish I can turn back the clock and tell you directly that I done all of this because I love you, my son.” Father… I don’t...

“Quinn! You need to hurry back!” Mira! That’s her voice! “We are being attacked!”

“But, Mira…!”

“Go, my son! She needs your help more than I do.” The replica nods at me. “Help her!”

“Father, I…”

“MASTER!” Fenrir turned to a werewolf version of himself. “WE NEED TO GO NOW!”

“FATHER!” I yelled out as Fenrir carried us out of his mind.

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