Anger in me

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Angry daughter and sad mother

The next day

Today is the day when my mom will visited me for the first time since I first come here. I missed her but it was nice having little time without her around. I was scared what will be her reaction seeing me. A week before I came here we didn’t talk till day when I needed to came here but on that day we only spoke some words to each other and that’s it. Beck saw that something was wrong, that I was worried about something but she didn’t want to upset me so she didn’t ask.

We headed to the class. I was worried what will happened after all our classes ends and Beck was worried about me.

After all classes

Mikaela’s POV:

That’s it, I’m gonna see my mom again. I’m scared. No. I’m fucking tariffed what’s gonna happened next.

Lily’s POV (Michaela’s mom):

What’s gonna happened next? Is she still angry with me? Does she hate me? That were question I didn’t have answer for. After I send her here I didn’t hear of her or see her but I missed her so much. I missed her; loud screaming when she was playing video games, her smile even she didn’t smile much but when she did her smile light up whole room and something I missed the most was her. I don’t know what will I do if she will not forgive me. I was tariffed.

She is coming, I could feel it, I don’t know how but I did. A second later I saw here beautiful face again. She is so beautiful. If you look at her you can’t see what is she feeling. You don’t know if she’s happy, sad, angry, upset you can’t and will never know.

We saw each other again, I fielded dropping one of my tears on my check. I didn’t now if that were happy or sad tears. When she saw me she didn’t smile or cried. I wasn’t even surprised, I would be surprise if she did.

Michaela’s POV:

“Hi mother.” I said. I only call her mother when I’m angry. I always call her mom or mama. “Honey...how are you?” She started talking with tears in her eyes. “Oh, I don’t know, my own mother sended me away and then just says how are you. If you want to hear me say; omg mom I missed you so much, I love you and nothing is wrong I’m not mad at you for sending me away. I can say that but it wouldn’t be true. Do you want me to lie? Mom you didn’t raised me that way. I said with a evil smile.” She started to cry. “I did these for you Michaela, it broke my heart but I send you away for your own good.” When she said that it sounds like she couldn’t breath anymore because of her crying. “Hahaha”, I laugh. “Oh really? You sended me away for my own good? To be more happy or what? I will tell you I am happier that I will ever be when I will not see you again!” I screamed with anger. My mom runed out of the building crying. And then I was aware what I said. “Omg how could I said that to my own mother. I was mad that’s why I said that but I didn’t mean it.”

A piece of my heart was broken. I was angry on myself but as you can guess I didn’t cry. That’s why I went to the shooting training ground. I started shooting in all targets and I hit all of them. My anger was becoming bigger and shooting wasn’t helping. I grabbed my boxing gloves and I started hitting boxing beg and that didn’t help either so I putted my gloves down. With my bare hands and whole power I had, I started beat shit out of bag. I only felt my anger nothing more but then I felt something cold and wet on my whole hands. It was blood. I hit too hard in the bag that’s why. A second later I felt someone watching me and of course it was Beck. She looked at me with care. “Oh, Mich what happened?” “Its nothing, don’t worry it’s nothing.” I said while trying to hid my bloody hands. “Don’t try to hide them. Come here.” She grabbed me and pushed me into the bathroom. She cleaned and wrapped my hands. It was nice for someone to care for me. “I’m sorry Beck.” “You have nothing to apologize for. I know what happened Max told me. I know it feels bad because I did the same thing to my dad and that broke me but he forgave me because he knew it how I was feeling at the time.” When she was saying that it was obviously that she was sorry what she did back then because she didn’t mean it. She just smiled at me and said; “Come on I will show you what helps me when I’m angry.”

Beck’s POV:

I knew it how she felt. I was in same position one year ago and Max helped me, now I’m gonna help her. Not because I need to but because I want to. I feel like we are gonna need each other in the future.

I gave her boxing gloves and she put them on. I did the same. “Ok, now show me all you got.” “You mean we are gonna fight?” She was confused. “Yes, that helps, trust me but if you’re scared we can do something else.” “HA, you wish.” She said. We start to fight and she was good, like she had experiences before. She maybe she’s good but she isn’t better than me.

We were tired as hell and everything hurts us now but it was fun. After we finished we were laughing. I was so happy that she was better now.

“Thank you Beck, what you did was something the nicest someone ever did for me.” She looked like she’s gonna cry so me as me I needed to make fun of her. “Oh are you gonna cry big baddie.” I laugh. She punched me in the arm and said; “You wish, with a smile.” “Ok, ok but now you need to give me a hug.” I said with a smirk. “I don’t hug. ” She was serious. “You will need to get used to it because I like to hugs”, and I pulled her in a big hug. “Baddie like you likes to hug? I would more say that you are big softie.” “I have both sides so be careful.” I laugh at her. “Of course”, she winked at me.

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