The Unicorn Avenger, in full regalia, led his team through the woods until they came upon a familiar cabin. Trent squealed at the prospect of their impending victory. While still out of sight, The Unicorn Avenger handed Denise the broken-off unicorn horn. In a flash of light, Denise was transformed into The Pink Unicorn, wearing a pink spandex suit with the same picture of a unicorn on the front. She floated up into the trees and then quickly flew back down to her comrades. James couldn’t believe his eyes. With the cape around her back, she looked almost exactly the same as the damsel from his dream.
“Alright! Look at me! I bet the League of Vivoneely never looked like this! Let’s do this thing!” The Pink Unicorn flew along, leading the way.
The back wall of the cabin disappeared and revealed Luke, and his two henchmen, setting up the unicorns neatly in a row.
“I’ll be taking that,” James said as he took a statue. He threw it to George. “And that and that.” He gave one to little Trent and kept the other. The room filled with light, as George, Trent, and James found their powers. George, Captain Vivoneely, had a glorified police uniform and had the power to see true evil, Trent, Unie the Boy Wonder, had the cutest onesie and the power to lift heavy objects, and James, well, James, had what looked like long underwear, turned inside out, and he was never really sure what his power was.
“Ah ha!” shouted The Unicorn Avenger, “I knew that you were all vested with true power. Now let’s kick some butts!” It was easy to take the two henchmen, who were packed and ready to leave anyway. Luke was surrounded.
“How did you guys get powers and I didn’t? I mean, you didn’t even try,” Luke said, on the verge of tears.
“Only those with pure hearts and a direct blood link to the League of Vivoneely can handle the pure power of the unicorn,” The Pink Unicorn said.
“But, if you had been able to create the Uni-Horn©, then your evil power would control the world,” stated Captain Vivoneely.
“That is why we must stop you and restore balance to the universe,” claimed The Unicorn Avenger. Trent was silent and James couldn’t think of anything clever to add.
“Well, there are still two unicorns out there. If I can get them, I can find a way to use their power.” With this, Luke pulled out one half of the dragon and disappeared. The Unicorn Avenger pulled everyone in a huddle and they disappeared too. They found themselves in a space/time flux that was neither alive or dead, heaven nor hell, real or imaginary. Luke was a few space units ahead of the rest, but as they tried to run, no one seemed to get closer or farther away.
“Stop running, friends. It is useless,” cried the Unicorn Avenger. “We are here to find the last two unicorns. Unfortunately, The Uni-Locator© was made in 1973, so it doesn’t work anymore. Too much cell phone interference. We need to go somewhere that is unencumbered by modern technology.”
“Wait! I know! Mr. Scrushy’s safe! Let’s go!” James was glad to be a help. The team went on up to Sycamore Road and knocked on the door. Mascara running down her face, Mrs. Nelson answered the door.
“WHAT DO YOU WANT?” she bawled.
“Umm, Mrs. Scrushy? We need to use your husband’s safe.”
“It’s NELSON now, and what for. It’s worthless. Whatever. Come on in.” The team rushed in and locked the safe behind them. Carter, who was still there, watched in amazement.
“Bleep, blip, bloop,” went the Uni-Locator©.
“It says that one unicorn is in Newark and one is…right here?” the Unicorn Avenger was surprised. There was a beeping noise coming from a green vase in the back of the safe. Marked “Do Not Touch,” the vase was the perfect hiding place. Captain Vivoneely broke the vase to reveal a mint condition unicorn. Trent squealed gleefully. They happily came out of the safe. Elizabeth Nelson stood outside, waiting. The Unicorn Avenger handed her the statue.
“What are you doing?” asked James, “She killed people in this story! This is NOT cool! She can’t possibly have a pure-” With this, Elizabeth touched the tip of the horn, and a flash of light filled the room.
“Daaamn!” everyone but Denise shouted. George fainted.
“Wow! I’m hot - evil and pure!” Elizabeth, The Invisible Unicorn, laughed. “Now I know where that last unicorn is! My brother’s ex – Joan Finkelstein. She lives in Newark. Let’s go!” After picking George up off the floor, the team went out to find the last piece of the puzzle. Arriving at Joan’s house, the team was struck by a silence in the area, as though someone had already been there. The door was open. They walked in to find the place a shambles. There was a yell from the bathroom. Joan Finkelstein was wrapped up in the shower curtain. She said, “I hate kids, especially mine, but Calvin! He’s in trouble.”
“My nephew! Calvin! I know where to go! Let’s go back!” shouted The Invisible Unicorn. Again, the team was on their way. Arriving at the Nelson home, there was more sense of danger in the air. Inside, Luke held Calvin, UniBoy, in the air. The gusts of wind coming from Calvin’s mouth were strong and fierce.
“With UniBoy’s power, I can get back all of your unicorns!” shouted Luke. The team looked at each other, unsure of what he had said.
“Speak louder!” they shouted.
“I have harnessed UniBoy using the great convincer, Skittles©!”
“Seriously, we can’t hear you!” Luke put the boy down and calmly started to explain himself. Before he got a word in, Calvin was hugging the extremely hot leg of his aunt. Suddenly, the ground began to shake. The horns from everyone’s unicorn detached and floated through the air to create the Uni-Horn©. The Unicorn Avenger pushed the horn into the ground. A light shined around the house and the screams of Luke could be heard slowly fading away. Pulling the horn from the ground, the light died down and Luke was nothing more than a pile of ash on the ground. The Unicorn Avenger then broke the Uni-Horn© on his knee and there were seven little pieces left. Everyone took their piece, de-activated their powers and stood looking at the mess.
“The balance has been restored,” Paolo said. The original League would be proud. Let’s hope we don’t have to do this again for a long time.”
“Yeah,” everyone agreed.