''G-Flat''

″Purcell″

″Lost a lot of Years″...we can never get back............my Brother was truly, amazing, ..taught himself, how too play the piano, at the age, of 9 years old, ...he was brilliant, truly, sharp, he was moved from the 7th too the 9th grade, in school, he also, had a lot of arrogance, let’s tell the whole, .....story. Purcell, was 2 years, older than, me, and 10 years older in mind, he was sassy, opinionated, talk smack, always in grown folk conversation, didn’t like being around, people he couldn’t learn anything from, he had this high energy level, edgy, couldn’t be still very long, read a book and throw it down, , do crossword puzzlers, in a flash, ready for the next, mental challenge, I, use too watch my brother, like, ″what the hell is wrong with this dude″ he would put me out of our bedroom, and block the door, we fought, constantly, he couldn’t fight worth a damn, I never, even bothered after a while, just let him throw me down, claim the victory, he gave my dad the blues, because, he wouldn’t stop playing with doll babies, every since he was 5 years old, he never turned the dolls a loose, I had hundreds of ''GI, Joes'' action figures, and green army battalions because he gave me his, my dad, knew....of course he knew what was up, and wasn’t a damn, thing he could do, too discourage, Purcell, he tried, but, like I’ve said, before, Purcell, was bull headed, strong headed as a child, mannish, and it was hard too reason with him, his conversation was above average for a child, and sometimes, my dad would just shake his, head and walk off, ...hell, that aint never worked for me, he aint never walked off, when I made a profound, remark, or statement,....what the hell, is this ″Jedi″ mind mess, my brother, got going, on...anyway, Purcell, excelled in everything, finished high school, then, went on Nursing School Graduated, started writing his own music, moved too Las Vegas, worked at the V.A.Hospital, I was devastated, angry and became, ″Bitter″. for a good while, didn’t hear from my brother at all, except for pictures he would send too my Sister, Linda Faye, he stayed in touch with her, and then he just stopped calling, and became distant, ″we lost some years″...I , heard from Family, ..he took on an ″Addiction″ I ,was in denial, no, way not my brother, yes, My brother, ...''wow'', ..he went through rehab, moved back home and when he did, I had a smile,on my face ''I’m so, happy'', he landed a 2nd, shift job, at Reynolds Health Center Highland Ave..his co-workers, love some, Purcell, he got him an apartment, we went too Colfax, furniture showroom, and Purcell was moving floor models around, like he wanted it too look in his place, the sales lady, looking at me, and I’m looking at Purcell, what are you doing, he said ″hush, grab that end, turn it this way″....lady just standing there, he finally, said I’ll take it,...I financed, him a car and a Baby, Grand Piano, for his apartment, he was making good money, so, no problem,, ... I’m trying too keep up, with him, and hanging out, visiting other, Churches, he jumping on these folks ''B-3 Hammond Organs'', and ''Piano’s'', during Devotional Services, I’m looking around waiting on one of them, ″still got some street in them″, Deacons, too say something too, Purcell, never happened, they enjoyed it, Purcell, had at least, 4, Minister of Music Positions, and all ended, with Purcell, walking out, Hanes CME, Rev. William Fails, Union Bethel AME, Rev. Werts, 2nd New Trinity, Prince of Peace Baptist, Rev. Bernard Adams , this is where, I began, too see, where he was too impatient with people, and this where, we began too argue, and he would, disappear, for days without answering his phone, and return my calls, and sometimes, when I would catch up, with him, his face would have scratches on it, he still had this attitude, and never wanted too discuss, what’s going on with, him, then, he, quit, his job, moved all his belongings too Michigan, hardly, called home, and we eventually heard from him, saying, he was coming back home, again....only this time, he is very sick, ....the Addiction had taken full control, members of the family, pulled together too shelter him and support him in any way we could, his sickness made him, even harder too deal with he got, sicker, he, was admitted too the Hospital in Graham NC, we would convoy and visit him, sing and laugh and talk, bout the old times, he would look around the room at everybody and just stare,.... a close friend of the family, wanted too sing a song, just too him,..''Geraldine'' ...sung, ″Still holding On″....we had no idea this, helfer, was gone sing no ''$#!+'', like that, we looking at each other like , what in the world,, ...even Purcell, looked at her, and said, ″who told you too sing that″ he should have smacked her ass, I, wouldn’t have open, my mouth,..and said a word, ...... I know she meant well, but ''dammit'', some ''$#!+'', you just don’t do... so, later on, we tried too get, Purcell, too eat his favorite lemon, pie, he love so, much, but he only took two bites and put the fork down, he was, sitting at the table, starting too drop off too sleep, been a long day for him, we embraced, one another, and hugged, Purcell, fragile, body, he was never much over a hundred and fifty pounds. I, knew in my Heart, as many times, as I, have, been in this facility , this would be the last time, I would see him, alive, his wave, tore my insides apart this time, and it, ripped at my heart, I could actually, feel the loss, it’s hard finishing this memory because, I’m seeing his face, as I bring this too an End,....″No Tears for the Writer, there will be no Tears for the Reader″ Rest In Paradise, James Purcell Little......You Know Just How Much, I Loved You...″ .That’s One Thing I have, that Comforts My Heart″