Crowd-sourced Assassin

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The Lucid Web

The pay is double with a success bonus that'd let him retire comfortably. If only he wasn't hunting himself.

Sergeant Aparu Gusintin waves him over to her lunch table. "You look like you purged your breakfast after a swill binge. What happened?"

"I got hired by the enforcement department for outsourcing to... Djibooty."

"Djibouti?"

"Yeah. Controlling my dreams is finally paying off." He slaps a specialist patch on his shoulder. "Their president died, and his crowd-sourced bounty was collected by an anonymous killer. I'm supposed to find him."

"Could be a her."

"Of course; I'm just nervous about ghosting professionally."

"You can sleep surf?"

"According to Lucille I'll be more productive than when I'm awake."

"Sounds like a dream job."

"I'll have a lot more free time. Maybe I can finally make it to one of your shows."

"That's not good enough. If you want to sleep with me, you need to do a whole set on stage and make me laugh at least twice."

"How about I just get us a reservation at any restaurant?"

"Fine, that five star one on Pier Sixty-Six. Get past the six-month wait for dinner tonight, and I'll show you how I got an A in calculus."

"I'm sure that's a nice story, but I'd rather have intimate relations with you."

She laughs. "You're a wonderful straight man."

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