Scarlett's Death Wish

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Night 7: Sketches of Death

Last night was probably the most boring day of my life. I got to listen to Samuel’s autobiography from his birth up to his career but still got no answer to my question about why is he so interested about me. Basically, he’s just a random guy, who randomly came to the diners, randomly got me as her server, and randomly talked to me. Purely, random.

Tonight, I’m here at the diners with a few customers because the storm is really on outside. Few cars were seen because of the low rate vision on the road. However, despite the storm crumbling outside, no one dared to go out, aside from Samuel who’s currently pulling his car in front of the diner. A man accompanied him with an umbrella while he enters the diner.

“Thanks, Eric. I’ll call you later.”

“Yes, Sir. Have a great night.” Eric is wearing a black coat and tie while his boss is just wearing a blue hoodie with a “rock ’em” print at the back matching with ripped pants and black converse shoes. Far from what a businessman should be wearing. Well, my judgmental mind will consider because of the sudden weather. My eyes followed Eric, the driver while he pull out the car at drive away.

“You should be welcoming a customer not staring at his driver.”

“Well, your driver’s hot.” I answered and sweep him away. I pretend to mop the floor near the door even if they were really clean. I just wanna see that face of his – disappointed, insulted and offended. I saw him approached Chris at the counter; probably ordering something. I continued my job until something came into my mind. This is a perfect scenario. I mean, it’s natural but why I never thought of this. I ran to get my bag and sat at the far end of the counter. I put out my sketchbook and draw something. I must keep my hands busy since there were just few customers.

32ND SKETCH: A wet girl, standing in the center of the road. The weather is just like the present – raining hard, lightning and thunders and zero visibility. A car will fatally hit her.

33RD SKETCH: The same girl standing by a tall electric post then suddenly a lightning struck, electrocuting her. 33rd SKETCH B: An X-Ray image of the girl.

I just can’t stop smiling because of this one.

I looked up to see Chris and Samuel looking at me totally clueless to what I’m giggling about. They probably think I’m crazy but who cares. I feel so much pleasure every time I got to draw something in this special notebook of me. It’s also a good thing that I’m not doing any of these yet. Still weighing which is going to be the most effective way to die and get lost. I only cut myself sometimes which is what I’m proud of. Maybe because ever since I was young, the pain has constantly come and as I grow up, I become more tolerant to them. That’s why I always wear long sleeves and hoodie to hide everything on my wrist but unfortunately, Samuel saw them.

“So, what are you doing after your duty?” Samuel slides next to me while holding his beer.


“Come on. It can’t be that simple.”

“Well, my life is simple. I go to work, and sleep.” Still, not daring to look at him. I was soon to finish my drawing when he asks another stupid question.

“Don’t you go to school?” Every time someone asks about my studies, I just feel a little pissed. I mean, yes, I am a drop out and that is my fault but I am so sick of people always expecting teenagers like me to go to school because apparently, we are the one who don’t have a decent life; like we don’t care about future. I closed my notebook and avoided him.

“I dropped out.” Samuel’s mouth is about to open but I took the chance of interrupting him when the bell rang. “Bye customer! Gotta clean!” I took the mop and other cleaning materials to clean the table. Sure, I could see Samuel’s sly smile when I walked out from his question.

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