18th day of August 2013
What was I thinking? He's still a boy. Yeah, he looked innocent. He's a bit afraid of girls. He's got that award winning grin plastered innocently on his cute face. Still! He's still a boy.
I should never let him on my bed. Okay, he didn't do anything. Nothing at all. Absolutely. He went to sleep the moment I told him to. But, he's still- ugh, this is my fault, really. I shouldn't blame anyone except myself.
"Um- Good morning, Chloe. I- uh are you okay?" He said after screaming. Yes, the moment he woke up he screamed on my face. Now, he sheepishly tried to make some distance from me. This made me feel bad at not trusting him at all. Then, why did I ask him that in the park?
"Did you get any sleep?" he looked worried now. He must thought that I'm blaming him for not getting a second of sleep. I must have looked weird right now. Eyebags, red eyes. I could easily pass off as a Zombie.
"I'm sorry. I—," It was my fault for asking him that last night.
"Hehe… it's nothing. I just can't sleep. I just found that you look really cute when you sleep." That should shut him up. He did just that, shut up, but he didn't go away as I hoped.
"Miles, why don't you go fix yourself some breakfast and I'll go and catch up with some sleep. Oh, and don't wake me up 'til lunch. Play some games if you want, just don't bother me, understand?" he nodded and saluted, I think. I'm so sleepy.
After I closed and locked the door, I jumped on my bed. I stayed on the side of the bed where Miles slept last night. I felt the warmth he left as I felt bad about not trusting him at all. Still, I kind of forced him to do that but I did not trust him at all. Hey, no one can blame me right?
I gave a tired yawn. My mind was blank when I stared at his face all night. My mind was not that tired because it doesn't hurt like it usually does whenever I do an all-nighter. I might have dozed off too, multiple times. Half an hour was probably the longest time.
I thought about again how I asked him to sleep with me last night. Yeah, I didn't intend it to be innocent at all but I can't help myself. Yeah right. I waited six years for that. Yes, six whole years for a wonderful toy I'm going to get.
T-toy? I didn't mean that! It just came out.
What am I talking about?
"Hey, she's not supposed to wake up until after lunch."
"Shut it! Chloe! Chloe!" Someone's knocking on my door.
10 AM? I guess four whole hours of sleep is enough. A girl's voice, wait, Mel? I completely forgot about her. Is she mad at me for ditching her last Friday? I didn't even bother to call her to apologize. Oh no, so much have happened.
"Mel!" I came bursting from my door and embraced her.
"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry Mel. I didn't mean what I've said last Friday and I forgot to call-"
"Alright, I'm sorry too, I'm not really mad, and etcetera. Actually, I'd rather you explain to me why that boy is being cozy in your living room playing video games." The moment of relief when she said that to me became insignificant as Mel asked me about Miles presence on my place.
The said boy was currently on the living room but I can't hear the sounds of the games he was playing. He either didn't like sounds or he pause the game for some reason.
"I found him alone last Friday on my way home." That sounded a lot like I'm asking a parent if I could keep a stray I found on my way home. "You know since it's raining and I learned that he's got nowhere to go, so I invited him over here. Oh, don't worry, we're completely fine. I promise nothing's wrong, nothing's broken I promise," I examined her reaction after I've said that. She nodded slowly, her way of trying to take difficult things to her head.
"Alright, if you're sure." She eyed the general direction of the boy in question while being in the process of being inside the living room, playing some mindless video games.
"I almost got him." I whispered so that only she could hear.
"About time, you've been stalking him for how long?" she gushed. I was about to warn her to lower her voice but Miles apparently heard her already. Oh no, what would he think of me now? I guess he won't mind, I hope. Still, I just realize, that's so embarrassing. I need to explain this to him later. Well I sure he didn't hear everything.
"heh, but that doesn't mean that I approve of him. I still think that you deserve someone better," Mel was nagging me again. That blow again huh?
"Yeah…" she apparently approved of my apparent approval, "but I also deserve someone I want! Are you trying to start another argument about this?" I managed to calm down, and lower my voice. "I like the guy Mel."
"Fine, I guess you have my support. It's just I'm worried you know," Mel then turned to the wall of where Miles was probably on the other side eavesdropping. "You hear that kid, any funny business and let's just say you'll wish you never existed." Mel threatened the now evidently listening boy on the other side of the wall that separates my room and the living room.
Actually I'm not serious about Miles, not yet at least. I just don't really like seeing the boy I admire for some unknown reason, to be lonely. Also, I know now how he gets with girls. I want to protect him. Just being with me will do that I'm sure.
Mel changed the subject finally. We now talked about Mel. Her countless tales with Mr. Playboy and her progress with capturing him within her clutches seem to amuse me. After half a day passed she finally ran out stories to say about Mr. Playboy and she said goodbye. I led her to the door where we can see Miles playing with my system. Well it's my older brother's but he gave them to me.
Now, I had a lot of explaining to do. I need to even if Miles doesn't ask for any explanation.
"Miles, let's talk." I grabbed his left forearm. His right arm was desperately trying to save his progress in this game. I had the mad urge of not letting him do that just to see him pout but I reminded myself that this was serious, so reluctantly I let him save his game.
He did not speak, I was waiting for him to say something first. I did not come after a while of not actually talking and explaining. I can't seem to start talking myself. What's wrong now?
Then, he quickly said something random.
"Look, I'm sorry for eavesdropping earlier. I heard my name and it's just," he paused bowed his head, apparently not wanting to make eye contact with me for some random reason. "I don't like it when people talk about me." Oh, Miles that's only normal. So that's just it? Sheesh, he looked like he just killed someone by accident. "Do you really like me?" Oh, those hopeful eyes again. I can't deny it now.
How should I respond? What if he laughed? No. Gee, Chloe, of course he wouldn't. But what if he became scared of me? I'm stalking him since he was eight. No, kids that age don't stalk. I just got curious about the new kid in the neighborhood that's all, and I got hooked up with him. Still, it's a legitimate reason for him to be creep out by me. Then, he'll ran away?
Whatever, I'll just tie him in my bed if - wait what? – and I'll keep him there and treat him like my p- no, no! What am I talking about?
"Chloe?" I haven't responded for a long time now.
"Ah, yeah! I like you." There I said it. The kid reacted in a way I did not expect. He looked as if he did not believe me and at the same time he looked as if he was hoping that I wasn't joking. "You know it's a crush." That statement did not affect him in the least. It means that we're in the same boat or that he's too desperate to listen. He scratched his nape in a flattery way. He's blushing.
"Um… well. I like you too Chloe," he reddened a few more shades. So, he does? But, not now, he's emotionally damaged right? It might be just that he definitely need someone to take care of him. He might not- ugh. To be fair though, he said that he liked me, though not necessarily that he likes me in any way.
"No, Miles… I- uh," I can't say that I have a whole scrapbook full of candid photos of him right? I think it's hidden somewhere around here. Should I show it to him? Why am I even pondering? Of course I shouldn't! Why did I even think of that?
"Chloe," he called me by my name.
"Oh yeah, what is it again?"