Chapter 10 | Round Two
I tried my best to get out of going. I tried everything.
“Liam, I have plans.” I sigh for the millionth time.
“I don’t care; you never want to come over to Ethan’s anymore. It’s not like you at all.” He accuses, and I just want to shake his shoulders and tell him that I can’t go to Ethan’s because my rapist just so happens to live under the same roof.
“We always go to Ethan’s, doesn’t it ever get boring?” I raise an eyebrow.
“Nope.” He says simply.
“Whatever.” I glare as we get out of our jeep and head to school.
We haven’t been on the best of terms ever since yesterday. He kept prying for answers when we got home, but I blew him off completely. I just didn’t know what to say. How do you explain a panic attack and being scared of your own brother? I know I’m not scared of Liam, he’s family, but I think I may be having early symptoms of PTSD and I just don’t know how to take it.
I know that my behavior has changed drastically, but that’s to be expected after what I’ve endured.
I meet Lexi at our lockers and sigh while slamming my head against the locker.
“You have no idea.” I deadpan.
“Listen, I don’t want to keep pressuring you, but this is starting to worry me. You aren’t yourself, and I don’t want anything bad to happen.” Lexi says carefully.
“I know that Lex. I know.” I finally lift my head up and look at her. I give her a sad smile and she returns it.
“Soon, I promise.”
Her eyebrows raise in surprise, as she lifts up her pinky finger.
I oblige, and her smile grows.
We can’t break our promises.
“There’s something else.” I say.
Lexi shuts her locker before turning to me.
“Liam won’t stop pressuring me to go with him to Ethan’s this weekend.”
“Absolutely not. You cannot go over there Dallas. How are you supposed to sit and act normal around your,” She looks around before whispering, “Rapist?”
“Yeah, now you see my dilemma, but I can’t keep blowing Liam and Ethan off.” I sigh.
“Then I’m going with.” She demands.
“No, I don’t want you around him Lex. Promise me you will come up with some way to get out of going. Lie and say you have to watch Jayce, whatever it takes. Just do not show up this weekend.” I urge.
Lexi frowns while shaking her head. “I can’t just let you go without me.”
“I’ll be fine. Liam and Ethan will be there the entire time.” I reassure. “Promise me.” I hold up my pinky finger again.
Lexi hesitates, but eventually locks fingers with me.
“Thank you.” I smile.
“But if something weird happens, I want you to call me!” She demands again, and this time I agree.
“Good, see you in third.”
After that, we both go our separate ways.
When it’s finally time for lunch, Lexi and I find ourselves eating lunch alone.
“I guess the boys finally found friends.” Lexi jokes.
I laugh with her, “I suppose they have.”
That or they’re avoiding my mood swings.
It wouldn’t surprise me. Especially Ethan. I feel really bad distancing myself from him. We’ve been so close for practically our entire lives, and all of a sudden it’s as if I can’t even stand to be around him.
The entire time I am, all I see is Jeremy.
I know it’s unfair to Ethan, but I just can’t help it.
“Oh, I spoke too soon, here they come.” Lexi suddenly says, and I whip my head in their direction.
“Greetings.” Ethan smiles while sitting beside me.
I discreetly move an inch away from him. Lexi notices.
“What’s up?” I ask, trying my best to remain casual.
“About to stuff my face with this pizza.” He smirks. “You?”
“I’m a step ahead of you.” I smirk back, glancing at my now empty plate.
“Touché.” He grins before eating.
Liam rolls his eyes, but continues to eat his food silently.
“So, Liam, how’s that English class?” Lexi asks. I know she’s trying to kill the tension wafting in the air.
“Good?” He raises a brow. “I mean it’s English, how fun can it be?”
“Beats me. I hate it.” Lexi laughs too loud.
“Okay, you’re acting weird.” Ethan points to Lexi, and I internally roll my eyes at her obvious behavior.
“She’s trying to hide the fact that Liam and I aren’t really speaking.” I blurt out.
“Why aren’t you speaking?” Ethan asks.
“Because she won’t tell me what’s bothering her.” Liam glares.
“And I keep telling him that nothing is bothering me.” I return said glare.
“Wow, alright, well… this was fun but I need to go turn in some late homework.” Ethan gets up and rushes away, trying to keep his distance from our twin fight.
“He never turns his stuff in on time, what a dork.” Lexi jokes, trying to lighten the mood.
The bell rings, giving me a que to get up and walk away.
I’m sorry Liam.
It’s Friday night, and my stomach aches with nerves.
I don’t want to give myself another panic attack, but I’m about to be in the same house as Jeremy.
I walk downstairs, dressed in long pants and an oversized T-shirt. The less skin I expose in front of Jeremy, the better.
“You do realize we’re swimming, right?” Liam smirks.
“I don’t feel like swimming.” I shrug, following him out of the door. We walk down the street to Ethan’s, and once we walk inside, the atmosphere practically chokes me.
Just knowing that he is here, makes my stomach drop.
“Hey guys!” Ethan greets, “Dal, long time no see, well here at my place anyway.” He laughs while hugging me.
I wrap my arms around him and surprisingly don’t feel weird about it. I honestly feel safe.
“You can stop with the jokes.” I warn while pulling away.
“Hey guys, the party is out here!” We hear a shout from the backyard. I swallow the lump in my throat at hearing his voice.
“Come on.” Ethan pulls me toward the backyard and Liam follows.
“Dallas, surprised to see you here, but glad you could make it.” Jeremy smiles wide, while eyeing my body.
I noticeably shiver.
“Thanks.” I mutter.
“We’re swimming, why don’t you strip out of those clothes?” He suggests, and my eyes slightly widen at how blunt he’s being.
“I’m good, thanks.” I say, before turning and walking over to one of the many chairs near the pool.
I pull my cell phone out and text Lexi.
Me: Update – Just saw him, he’s acting too nice, but I’m keeping my distance. Everything is fine. Xoxo.
Lexi: Cool, PLEASE keep me updated! Xoxo.
I smile at her reply and shove my phone back into my pocket.
I lean back against the chair and try to relax.
Both Liam and Ethan strip down into their swimming shorts before diving into the pool. They dive into the deep end, so luckily no water splashes onto me. I was smart and sat near the shallow end.
I look to Jeremy out of the corner of my eye, and see him working the grill.
“These steaks are gonna be killer!” He says loud enough for everyone to hear.
“Good, cause I’m starving!” Ethan shouts back.
“Hey Dal, how come Lexi didn’t come?” Jeremy suddenly asks, and that’s when I notice him walking over toward me.
I eye the empty chair resting beside me and beg the heavens above that Jeremy doesn’t sit down.
“She had to babysit Jayce.” I reply.
“Awe, how old is he now? I remember when Lexi told us she was going to be an older sister. She was so excited.” Jeremy reminisces.
“Wow, time flies huh?”
“I guess.” I shrug.
“Are we okay?” He asks.
The motherfucking audacity. God, he’s messing with my head and I can’t take it.
“Sure thing.” I grit my teeth toward him.
“Good.” He says in a husky voice. “Better be.” He then whispers so only I can hear it.
I take a deep breath and somehow find the will power to remain calm.
After a few seconds, he gets up and jumps into the pool after checking on the grill.
I sigh in relief, but I definitely sighed too soon.
“Well, it looks like we’re out of BBQ sauce and salad dressing.” Jeremy says while walking out from the kitchen.
I feel uneasy as his smirk lands on Liam and Ethan.
“Can you guys please run out to the store to get some?” He asks.
My eyes widen.
“Sure! Dallas you want anything?” Ethan says as he and Liam climb out of the pool and wrap towels around themselves.
“I’ll just come with you guys.” I say in a hurry while standing up.
“Nah, you can stay here. I need help finishing the sides.” Jeremy smiles.
“Yeah, we can manage.” Ethan laughs. “I’ll grab you a tea.”
I smile that he knows just what to get me, but the thought of having to stay in this house alone with Jeremy makes my stomach drop even further.
Maybe he won’t do anything since he knows the boys will be coming right back.
Should I take that risk?
“We’ll be back.” Ethan says as he and Liam walk through the house and out the front door.
I cast Liam a pleading glance, hoping he’d catch on to my distress, but he ignores it or doesn’t see it.
I eye Jeremy warily before rushing into the kitchen.
If I busy myself with cooking, maybe he won’t even bother with me.
As I begin chopping potatoes for the potato salad, I see Jeremy walk into the kitchen. He steps beside me to start cutting some celery, and I notice him step closer to me.
“About time I got you alone. I’ve missed you.” He says while focusing on his knife work.
“Just don’t get any ideas, and we can end this night peacefully.” I manage to say.
“Don’t challenge me Dallas, you won’t like the result.”
My heart rate increases as I continue with the potatoes.
I hear him place his knife down, before I feel him turn and step behind me. He presses his body into my back and inhales my hair.
“You smell amazing.” He breathes.
Not true you moron, I didn’t even shower before coming over here. That was on purpose.
“Please, don’t.” I say, as I drop the knife onto the counter.
My hands are shaking, so I don’t trust myself to hold a knife.
“You need to start coming over more often, the boys are becoming suspicious and I don’t want them figuring anything out.” Jeremy instructs.
“I don’t have to listen to you.”
“Ah, but you do.”
He grabs my waist and spins me around to face him, his body still pressed against my own. I try to wiggle free, but it’s no use. I can already feel a bulge in his pants.
My lips are trembling as he inches closer to my face. He licks his lips once before kissing me.
I try to push him away, but he just holds me tighter. He forces his tongue inside of my mouth, and it takes everything inside me not to throw up all over him.
When he finally pulls away, he glances at the clock and then back at me with a smirk.
He pulls his phone out of his pocket and opens a new text message.
“What are you doing?”
“I’m sending the boys a few more ridiculous items to pick up, hopefully prolonging their return.”
My heart sinks as I realize why he just did what he did.
I begin shaking my head.
“Please, no… not again.” I feel water welling up in my eyes, but I try my best to stay strong.
He ignores me while yanking me with him out of the kitchen. He picks me up and tosses me onto the couch, quick to climb on top of me.
I frantically kick my legs, anything to stop him, but he has me pinned yet again.
He releases a punch to my gut, and I scream out in pain, as my ribs had not fully healed yet.
“Shut the hell up.” He threatens while kissing me again to help keep me as quiet as possible.
I feel him reach down and unbutton my jeans. Tears immediately begin pouring from my cheeks as he manages to push my jeans down to my ankles.
He does the same with his pants, already pulling his penis from his boxers.
He wastes no time in thrusting himself into me as I scream out in pain yet again. I know for a fact I’m not fully healed down below either.
“I like hearing you scream.” He moans against my lips as he continues to thrust harshly.
I turn my head so I’m facing the wall on the other side of the room and I squeeze my eyes shut as more tears flow through.
Jeremy keeps going, not letting up at all. He’s slowly breaking me from the inside out, and I’m powerless to stop it. How long will this time last? How many times is he going to do this to me?
I feel completely numb. After minutes of him thrusting, I expect him to finish, but he doesn’t. He’s still going and I’m not sure how he hasn’t released yet.
“Don’t worry, I had a few drinks tonight, I wanted to last longer for you this time around.” He smirks down to me and I whimper in pain as he continues thrusting in and out of me.
“Please…” I cry.
“Yes, beg for it.” He pants while looking directly into my eyes.
“Please stop.” I manage to choke out through my sobs.
“You know you don’t want that.” He smirks even wider.
I glance over top of him to the front door, and pray to any God up above for Ethan or Liam to walk through that door.
Sadly, that doesn’t happen.
God only knows how many things Jeremy asked them to get, and the store is a good twenty-minute drive alone. It’ll probably be close to an hour before they’re back.
As the minutes tick by, I feel myself becoming more numb. I can hardly feel his thrusts any longer as I just lay there and stare at the ceiling. I began counting the ceiling tiles.
Something warm explodes between my legs and that’s when I know he’s finished. He pulls himself off me and pulls his boxers and pants back up.
“Go clean yourself up before the boys get back. Now.” His voice booms and I jump up and run straight for the front door. I open it up and slam it shut, running as fast as my feet would take me. I don’t stop, I don’t hesitate.
I’m extremely angry and horrified.
I don’t run home, instead, I run in the opposite direction toward Lexi’s house.
He’s not going to get away with this anymore. I cannot let this happen again. The first time was one time too many as it is.
He will not win. I will fight.
I need to.