He sat on the edge of his bed with his head in his hands and his curly dark hair wildly falling forwards.
He had been thinking about Clarice more than he had liked to and he found it hard to remove her from his head.
Even whilst he had spoken to the trainer today - all he could think about was Clarice, and how powerful she had looked whilst she was disrespectfully sitting on his seat at the dining table.
He shook his head in his hands before growling lowly - he willed himself to not feel so drawn to her, but seeing as he had marked her; it is hard for him to deny the feelings that grew stronger and stronger.
Feelings that made the beast inside of him crazy.
Everything he was feeling was mixing - up until he could only feel one emotion, and it was an emotion he had learned to live with.
He hated her.
He hated that he was growing to love her and he knew that had he been a mere were their bond would have long been sealed.
But when it came to the truth, it was not that simple.
He would refuse to near her until something in him changed or until the entire truth somehow came out in the open.
His lips curled up angrily when the door to his dark bedroom slammed open then quickly slammed shut.
He welcomed her scent with open arms, but could easily detect the change in her aura.
He had a feeling he would be getting yelled at.
He did not move from his position with his head placed in his hands and his curly hair curtaining around his face until she spoke.
His heart nearly stopped.
The way his name rolled off of her tongue unexpectedly made his heart clench so tightly that his breath got caught in his throat.
His eyes were wide as they met with hers and he took in the nervous look on her face and the way she was twiddling with her fingers.
How on earth had she learned of his name?
He was shocked. Utterly speechless.
Yet, no matter how confused he was, he wanted to hear her say his name again. Over and over again.
“That is your name, correct?” She asked timidly whilst she analyzed the deep furrow in his brows and the way his large hands began to flex in the dimness of his room.
He raised his nose, not bothering to answer her.
“Why have you failed to tell me of your breed? Of how different you are?”
His eyes nearly went agape before he snapped up from his bed and angrily stomped towards her.
She inhaled shakily when his large hands collided with her shoulders and pushed her back, flat against the door that was shut behind her.
Her chest heaved up and down rapidly and he knew that she knew she had hit a nerve.
“Who told you?” He growled out, his voice deep and almost afraid - he tried to hide how badly he wished she had not found out the truth.
She swallowed roughly, “so it is true. You are a Lycanthrope.”
He growled lowly.
His stomach churned and he burned to know where she had gotten that information from.
Anger swam in the pit of his stomach as he thought about Rettacus and the fact that Rettacus was one of his men that knew about his breed and that he was the only person in the castle that fraternized with her.
“Why have you failed to tell me that? I deserved to know, especially after you had marked me.” She asked angrily, he took in the way her perfectly sharp brow raised whilst she glared at him and struggled to hold himself back from baring his canines.
He raised his chin, “it means nothing. That is why. What my breed is, means nothing. To me, or you.”
“Well, clearly that is not true if you had tried to hide it to this day... And you even had the audacity to not explain to me the changes in my face and body. I believe I deserved to know at least that.”
He cleared his throat, trying to hide the shock that kept returning.
Where in the hell had she gotten all of this information from?
His eyes narrowed into thin slits, “who had told you all of this?”
She growled lowly, “I found out all on my own. Now you will explain the rest to me because I refuse to be kept in the dark.”
He chuckled darkly, even she could feel the sudden change in his aura.
Clarice gazed at him through wide eyes.
She took in the change in his icy gray orbs - they had darkened to a demonic black color that sent shivers down her spine.
“You want to know more?” He asked, his voice deeper than it had been earlier making her cower back into the door behind her.
He smirked maliciously before grabbing onto her shoulders and spinning them around in a second.
She nearly got whiplash when her back collided with his front and her she found her eyes glued on his large bed.
He gripped her chin before raising her head and bringing her eyes to the large and horrific painting she had been intrigued by the last time she had entered the room.
“That.” He drawled out breathlessly by her ear, the rumble of his words making her exhale shakily.
She took in the painting once more - she had already known that that was him.
She remembered what his Lycanthrope looked like from that night and the one in the painting was the perfect replica.
She gulped, “the blood?”
He chuckled by her ear but it sounded more like a deadly growl and the vibrations of his broad chest against her back made her squeeze her eyes shut.
“That is a painting that was made to depict me. I am a monster and the blood is that of my enemies.”
Her breath caught in her throat and she tried to force her eyes to open but something was making her keep them shut.
Something was keeping her from looking at the painting, from listening to him as he called himself a monster and before either of them could realize she swiftly turned in his hold and her eyes slowly opened and glued on his.
His back was bent, allowing his face to reach her level and she could easily see the indescribable storm in his eyes.
She could see the hatred he held for himself and it made her chest tighten.
“Is that how you see yourself?” She whispered, her voice leaving her angelically soft - she was trying to speak to him delicately, in hopes of him not lashing out.
He did not answer, he just glared intensely at her, the storm in his eyes not once disappearing and it made her lips etch downwards.
“You are not a monster.” She told him - ignoring as the sudden memories - that proved the opposite of her statement - began to play in her head.
Memories of the way he had hurt her countless of times, yet in this moment, none of that mattered.
He remained stoic and motionless whilst glaring at her - his orbs darkening to an almost unrecognizable shade making her shake her head softly before she raised her shaky hand and placed it directly onto his cheek.
Sparks shot out from where their skin was touching and she held back a jump in shock - every touch of their skin felt like the first time, for them both.
She rubbed the stubble on his cheek gently before forcing his head to stay straight and making him keep his eyes on her.
“You are not a monster Cerberus.” She repeated, this time his name left her lips almost absentmindedly and that most certainly got a reaction from him.
Upon hearing his own name leave her plump lips again his jaw clenched tightly under her soft palm and his eyes fluttered shut before they quickly reopened - instantly returning to their narrowed glare as he tried to act as if he had not just reacted to her.
“I know you are probably forced to believe so, but you are not. You can not control this version of yourself, and if you open up to me, I will try my hardest to help you.” She told him softly, pleading him with her wide eyes to listen to her, but she knew by the way his lips curled upwards that he wished to do anything but.
“Please. Let me help you help us. All you have to do is talk to me. I need to know more about you, to understand you and understand my new self in order for us to work. Please, I am begging you to finally look at me as your soulmate and no longer as the pup you had taken from her pack.” She begged imploringly while gripping onto his cheek tighter and feeling as the sparks traveled to her elbow.
He inhaled deeply before shaking his head, “what is there to talk about? You have found out about my breed, you have found out about the changes and I have showed you the painting. You know enough now to understand the truth, the truth that I am unmistakably and most certainly a ruthless monster.”
He tried to pull away from her and that made her hand fall off of his cheek abruptly but she had quickly recovered and grabbed onto his hands - keeping him in his spot.
His calloused hands were stuck in her small hold and it would have looked comical to anybody if they were to have seen this, but even then she would not have cared.
She brought his hands closer to her chest before taking a deep breath, his intense gaze made her cheeks burn.
“No, you are not. That is what you have made yourself and others believe and it is time that, that changes...If you continue down this warpath Cerberus then it will only get worse. I am basically begging you to change and to accept me, and to talk to me, but it is evident that you are adamant on staying silent.”
“So now you will listen to me.” She told him strongly, her eyes not once wavering from his as he still glared at her intensely.
When he did not respond she took that as her cue to continue and gripped his hands absentmindedly tighter - as if that helped her remain courageous.
“I understand that what you have done to me in my time here was bad, and it most certainly could be depicted as monstrous and it is not something that I can forgive easily, however we can move on and learn from it, especially if you decide to no longer deal with me so harshly.” She started, stopping to take in his reaction and when she was met with his blank face she took it as a sign to continue.
“I also understand that there are some things that are different about you in comparison to other male wolves and that is okay. I understand that you also probably have had a rough past that has a part in that as well, which you do not have to explain to me if you do not have a desire to. However, I want to understand Cerberus. I want to be in the known and understand why you are like this and how I can help because I can see it in your eyes that you no longer wish to be filled with so much...” she trailed off, realizing that the pace of her talking had gotten abnormally fast and stopping to inhale the breath that she had been missing.
She exhaled shakily, “I know that you no longer wish to be filled with so much anger and hatred, I just know it.”
Her heartbeat was echoing in her ears and she nearly cringed at how fast it had gotten before licking her dry lips.
He stayed silent and she hated that she could not recognize anything on his face - he showed no type of emotion.
“You just know it?” He suddenly asked her with a curled upper lip making her heart skip a beat.
She cleared her throat, “yes.”
He shook his head before chuckling darkly - she could sense how his aura had changed and darkened and her brows furrowed in wonder.
“Something has changed.” She stated softly while using her thumb to absentmindedly rub his large hand - hoping her touch would make the aura around his muscular structure change.
He looked at her weirdly.
“This is no longer the human you, am I correct? It is the Lycanthrope side I am sure of it... I re-” she stopped herself from finishing that sentence because she had almost given herself up before she subtly cleared her throat.
“I heard that when a person takes the Lycanthrope form, he becomes more beast than man, and if he allows it to take control than their humanity is basically entirely gone. And judging by the way you always manage to change the way you are feeling so quickly-”
He cut her off with a growl before ripping his hands away from her and quickly finding the back of her neck with his right hand and dragging her face closer to his.
She gasped and instantly noticed his sharp canines that had long been bared - her chest was rising and falling rapidly and now she knew that she was correct.
He had given up his control to the Lycanthrope side.
“What?” He spat out angrily, she could sense his shock and it nearly made her smirk proudly.
She met his intense glare head on, feeling something stir inside of her.
“You heard me.” She said with the same strength he had used making his jaw clench tightly.
She noticed how her own voice had deepened and it made her brows furrow.
“Before you yell at me, answer me one question.” She told him the second he had opened his own mouth making it instantly close shut.
He growled warningly at her but she ignored it.
“Seeing as you have marked me, what does that make me? I know I am undergoing changes to my human body, that much is evident. But what shall happen to my wolf, and to my own humanity?” She asked worriedly, struggling to keep her forehead from creasing in concern.
He analyzed her face before chuckling humorlessly.
“Do not worry parvulus, you will figure that out all on your own.”
His words made her face fall in defeat, she thought he would speak to her - at least about something that dealt with her but clearly she was wrong.
“What will happen if I become like you?” She suddenly croaked out, she could feel as his hand tightened on the back of her neck whilst he processed her words and her stomach churned.
“What will happen if I give up my control. Turn my humanity off, and forget about our bond? If I toss you to the side like you have me and allow myself to indulge in my newfound anger and hatred? What happens then?” She continued sadly, her voice cracking after every question making her eyes well up.
He stayed silent but she saw as his eyes began to subtly lighten.
She sniffled, “you will not help me understand you Cerberus. But at least help me understand myself because unlike you I do not wish to lose myself nor the light inside of me like you have.”
Silence consumed the both of them after that and she could feel as a stray tear burned down her flushed cheek.
His wide eyes followed the tear all the way down to her chin before they glued onto her frowning lips.
She gulped lowly, “I just want you to help me. That is all. You do not have to love me, nor will I have to love you. We do not have to become regular mates, but I do want you to respect the fact that I am now your other half. You were the only documented Lycanthrope and now you have marked me. So now we are two. Please Cerberus, fill me in on your knowledge.”
She licked her salty lips when she finished and watched as his face fell.
Tension filled silence enveloped them and her heart was wildly skipping beats in her chest when she noticed the way his eyes had abnormally lightened.
“Alright.” He whispered softly, the word left him so quietly to the point where it was nearly inaudible but she had heard him, and it nearly made her squeal happily aloud.
Tears of joy suddenly replaced the disappointed ones and her lips quirked up into a small smile before she repeated what he had said, “alright?” The word left her the same way it had him, however her whisper sounded more confused.
To her utter surprise he had chuckled in response, and this time it had not been dry nor humorless, but an honest and sincere chuckle that nearly made her swoon.
“Alright.” He stated strongly before the hand that he had been using to cradle the back of her neck softly trailed to her cheek and she found herself absentmindedly leaning into his warm palm.
“Thank you.” She said happily, she sounded breathless and shocked, and he knew that in this moment she was happier with him than she had ever been during her stay here and that made his face slowly move closer to hers.
She noticed their lack of distance and sniffled back the liquid that she began to feel tickle her cupid bow whilst her bloodshot eyes slightly widened.
“You have no idea how much this means to me, I-”
She could not continue for she was interrupted by his soft lips that had gently connected with hers.
She gasped in shock - this had not felt like last time and her stomach erupted into a fit of butterflies.
Last time they had kissed it had been rough and forced, now it was soft like a feather and she welcomed him happily.
Her lips instantly responded to his and her hands instinctively swirled around his waist, hugging him closer to her making sparks shoot all around them.
His plump lips moved gently against hers as if he feared hurting her and that made her toes curl.
Both of their eyes were closed whilst they kissed and the second Cerberus felt as she began to struggle to breathe, he slowly pulled away.
Their foreheads were pressed against each others and he watched as her chest rose and fell rapidly.
He took in her eyes that were still tightly squeezed shut, her rosy cheeks and her swollen lips with pride in his broad chest.
Her lips were still slightly open and that made the corners of his lips etch upwards but he forced them to stay in place.
He could not deny the girl any longer. He knew that.
He knew his resolve was falling and he was scared, but he did not care. He would try.
He would try for her.