The next work day was very hectic. The layout of the hotel was spread on my desk as I was writing all of my ideas on my notebook of what I planned to do with each floor and what I would put where and why. I was being completely thorough with my planning so there would be no confusion and no need for questioning when I have my meeting with Sean to show him the plans.
I was kind of nervous of if he will approve of it or not, because I've put a lot of thought into what theme to go with for this hotel. If he doesn't like it I have a few backup ideas, but this one is my favorite and I'm hoping that he will be able to see the full picture and can imagine the beauty of it. I want to do things in red and black as the main colors with a little bit of white details to make it really stand out. Something about the colors are mysterious yet beautiful and I think it looks luxurious.
Before long, Lilly is knocking on my door and stepped in. "Boss wants to see you." She spoke. Well I could have figured that he would want to speak to me. I've been avoiding his texts and calls. Nodding my head, "Okay, I'll be right there. Also, will you please go ahead and schedule me a meeting with Mr. Morgan? Sometime this week if possible."
She agreed and left. Leaving me to collect myself and head to Evan's office. Knocking quietly, I stepped in, shutting the door behind me. Evan was sitting there with papers in his hands, and his hair all mussed up. He looked up at me and scanned the length of my body before nodding to a seat in front of his desk. I sat silently and played with my fingers. He never tells me to sit in a chair. He normally makes me sit on his lap, so this must be something serious.
Looking up, my eyes met his. "Ava. Have you thought about what I asked you last time we spoke face to face?" Shit. He wants an answer now. Maybe I should just be honest and tell him the truth. fuck it, we can see how it goes.
"Truthfully, Evan I like you. I feel things with you that I've not felt before." He smiled at me, but then he furrowed his eyebrows before speaking. "Why does it sound like there is going to be a 'but' coming?" I sighed before continuing. "But I don't know how to do relationships. I don't want to hurt you and I don't want to be hurt. I like how things are now between us because there is no pressure to do things a certain way, no expectations, and it gives you the freedom to find a sub that works well along with you."
By the end of my little speech, he had moved to where he is squatting down in front of me. He took ahold of my fidgeting hands and kissed the back of my knuckles. He took a shaking breath before meeting my gaze. "Ava, I don't want anyone else. I would never hurt you, and we can figure this relationship stuff out together. Hell, its been years since I've had an official relationship myself. As far as you hurting me, that is a risk I'm willing to take."
He paused. I could see the nervousness in his features but he seemed to have made up his mind. But before he could speak, I decided to say something. "Evan, I slept with someone else on Valentine's Day. I normally wouldn't tell you that I slept with someone else but the fact that you are thinking about a serious relationship with me, I figured you should know." I trailed off, not able to meet his eye.
I'm not ashamed of Sean, hell I loved every minute of it. But I couldn't help but feel a little guilty. Guilty because Evan has slowly made a place in my heart and I could not deny that. Was it love? I have no fucking clue. But I knew that I would be broken if he was no longer in my life. Whether we are just friends, fuck buddies or more.
Evan was playing with my fingers before he asked me to look at him. When I did, his eyes held nothing but kindness. "Ava, it's okay. I slept with someone too. I was hurt that you didn't immediately agree to be with me, and I thought you wouldn't even consider it. So I went to the club and found a willing sub, but after we spent the night together, I knew she wasn't what I wanted. The only one I want to dominate is you."
I won't lie, my chest ached once he told me that he slept with someone else, but did I have a right to feel this way? I mean I did spend a night and part of the next day with another man myself. But that doesn't change the fact that it stung knowing he was with another woman. "Evan, I am not a permanent sub. I can't please you the way you desire. I know-" Before I could finish he busted out laughing, gathering me in a hug.
"Damn it, Ava. Don't you get it? I want you for you. You give me immense pleasure, both by just being in my presence and in the bedroom. I don't want you to be a permanent sub, I like the fact that we can switch it up. I'm not asking for our deal to change completely, just that we don't sleep with anyone else. We are reserved for each other and also..."
I wait for him to continue before I squeeze his hand. "Also what, Evan?" He smirked at me, before giving me a playful kiss. "I want us to start dating. I want to take you out, at least once a week." A smile made it's way onto my face. That sounded wonderful and I honestly couldn't be happier with Evans confession. I really liked it and I want to take him up on that offer. The only problem was Sean.
He also wants to continue our sex-capades, and a part of me does too. I love the way he makes me feel and the way we feel when our bodies are pressed against each other. It is exciting and I'm not sure if I want it to end so soon. "Evan, I'm not sure. I don't want this to ruin our friendship if it doesn't work. Maybe we should just stop while we are ahead? I mean we work together for shits sake!"
Evan rolled his eyes at me. "This will change nothing, if it doesn't work, we will move on. Act like it never happened. We will remain friends and our work relations will be normal. Not our normal since we like to have a little-uh- extra fun. But normal everyday boss and employee relationship." He chuckled. And the look in his eyes were drawing me in.
That may or may not be the reason for my response. As he drew me in closer to his body and was staring into my eyes with anticipation. Waiting patiently for my answer. The answer that will either make or break everything that we have done together. And in the end, did I really have it in me to turn him down? He is seriously the sweetest, sexiest man and he is asking me to give him a chance.
So that is why I uttered one little sentence. "Okay, lets do this." Before he crashed his lips down on mine in a passionate kiss. I felt happy and excited but then that all came crashing down when I thought of Sean and I couldn't help the little part of me that felt nothing but regret.