As I sit in the room that was assigned to me. I had gotten some orders to follow. I couldn’t shower without being watched I couldn’t leave the eye sight of the person that was watching me. I just wanted to sit in my room but I had to move around the area because they say it makes u depressed more. I goes in a room everybody goes to watch tv called the snack room u get snacks, play games, and sit and talk. I didn’t have nobody to talk to but I had nice people come up to me greeting me. I had people coming to me telling me I was to beautiful to be in there and asked me why I was in there and they immediately seen why by looking at my arm I try so much to hide.
I gain friends and they tells me they story on while they there and I tells mines. I was close with this one white girl that was in for doing meth and that had gotten her kids token away from her because she didn’t wanna b clean. Her name was sierra. She was a cool friend. It was bed time and I had gotten a phone call I can only talk in the hallway where somebody could see me. It was my girlfriend, crying telling me she misses me. It broke me into pieces because I couldn’t walk out when I wanted to. I told her to stop crying before they make me get off the phone and she calmed down and we talked our conversation. She told me everything to say and asked the doctors when they see me how long was I gone be in and can I sign myself out. She’s been in this situation before so I took her advice and did so.
When I went to my room I cried my eyes out, cause my girlfriend was hurt she was ready for me to come hoMe as bad as I wanted to come home I couldn’t. The next day the doctor wanted to see me. I went in all down and depressed and ask when am I going home. They ask me was I suicidal I said no. They ask me why am I so depressed I said my grandmother. They said I wasn’t ready to go home yet so that was the end of that. I was disappointed. But I couldn’t show it. I wanted to get out of there so I had to act normal. They gave me some for my arm and some medication to help me sleep. It was 2 days before my birthday and I was trynna get outta there before my birthday. I gotten my phone call from my girlfriend we laughed talked and I did the same routine Again and again.
It was visitation time and my girlfriend was on time always. I hugged her and kissed her but the security yelled no touches like I was in jail or some. Like bitch please but I did as told. We sat down the table in front of each other and ending up trynna touch hands but stopped in our tracks. Lol no touching I forgot. We ended up touching each other feets, she tells me I need to do what I gotta go and come home she needs me. I tells her I am cause I’m ready to be with her. We finish laughing and talking and our time was up. She was about to cry but I told her don’t cause they was gone take me away. I wish I could Hold her and kiss her. I wanted to go out the door with her, that’s how much I misses her.