Chapter 1: ELAINE
The alarm on my phone goes off, i don't monotonous day, wake up, make breakfast for the my cousins, cook food for the dogs, mop and polish the floors, clean the bathroom and fold the laundry from last night and bath the kids before she wakes up, my aunt. I do things extra careful today and perfect, so that she doesn't make me start all over again, that would throw me off for an hour, i can't afford that, atleast not today. My second alarm goes off, 6:00 am, it's time to feed the dogs, and wake the annoying brats for school.as i do all my chores for the day, i think about what i am going to do today, The opportunity could not get any better than this. I have to trust my plan or it will not work. As i prepare breakfast i work on making my face as emotionless as possible, which is not hard since I've had five years of practice. To show emotions around here is like flashing boobs at church, i learnt that the hard way. The crying was the hardest to stop, but i stopped it, no matter how hard it got i wouldn't cry, i remember the last day i cried it was two years ago. But that reflex is gone and i don't miss it. The constant smiling and vibrant energy was the first to go.
its hard to imagine i was that girl that smiled at everyone, picked wild flowers and would chase butterflies, if i knew what i know now I'd tell her to enjoy it while it lasts, because life isn't that easy and blissful.
Life is a vast ocean that will drown you, bring you back up for air and drag you to the bottom of the sea, where everything is dark and everyone is gone.
wham! I'm woken from my daydream by a Sharp slap across my face! I spil hot porrige all over the front of my shirt and the stove, you'd think I'd get used to it by now, the slapping, it's happened a thousand times but each sting hurts the same as the first time. I quickly grab a dish towel and attempt to remove the mess, i don't even ask why it happened, i don't wanna know the answer.
" Sam doesn't have a spoon!" She says, calmly, i always think it would be better if she shouted, that i can handle but this calm manner is like the quiet before a storm and God knows I've had too many storms for a lifetime. I open the drawer and hand zaami a spoon, the little brat smirks at me because he knows i gave him a spoon and he hid it on purpose. Watching me being beaten because of them is their favorite entertainment, sadism runs in the family.
As i stand by the door and watch them eat, i go over my plan once more in my head, every minute and every second counts, if i don't do this i will never get out of this hell. Next weekend the whole family is gathering here as they do every year, i used to love coming here as a kid, seeing everyone admire me and my mom on having the latest gadgets, the latest fashion and a new car every year, it was blissfull, i enjoyed the sense of unity and love at this gatherings, how it felt like i had six extra mothers and not aunts, my cousins felt like siblings, it was family tradition for me and my mom to recite our yearly travels, what we'd seen and the food we ate, but that was before everything changed, before happiness burnt to ashes on my throat and my whole world flipped around. The last four gatherings have been torture, to watch some people live my life whilst i have been reduced to stone, to an empty vessel that knows nothing but duty and the occasional slap.
They get up from the table and i start to mechanically clean up, watching the clock on the wall as i wash the dishes and rinse them five times. At 07:00am the two brats head out to school. And i contemplate how much I'm not gonna miss them, you'd think I'd care more for them since I've been taking care of them from a young age but i don't, because they are their mothers children and i hate their mother.
07:15 she does her usual rounds, checking if the floor was mopped well, that the dogs are fully fed, that the dining room is spotless and to check if she can see her reflection on the pots I've been scraping for 30 minutes. Her mouth sets into a frown telling me that she's found nothing wrong. After she goes to work i wait to hear her car leave the garage and let out a relieved sigh. I hope to never have to see that face again.