Tippy toe, tippy toe. Don't let the monsters hear you.
I hummed the song silently in my head like I used to do when I was little while I crept to the kitchen.
It was seven in the morning and all I could think about was the kiss Cameron and I had last night. It was all I thought about until one this morning when sleep finally relieved me.
I didn't know how to feel about it. It felt so right, yet I felt like a big hypocrite.
I didn't want to face him just yet, hence why I was trying to be as quiet as possible on my way to the kitchen because I was starving.
I made it pass the living room safely, and I didn't see or hear any shuffling from the couch so I was home free.
But of course, the universe sees my life as a sick joke it presumes because everyone, including Cameron, were in the kitchen eating breakfast.
I was utterly confused because Alyssa wasn't a morning person, and Alex doesn't normally eat until around nine for some weird reason.
I stopped dead in my tracks as I eyed them all. They didn't seem to notice me, so I slowly began to retreat from the area. But in that millisecond when I was almost home free, Alyssa's head whipped towards me and bellowed a loud 'good morning Jamie' for the whole country to hear.
And you know who lives in the country? Cameron.
He found my eyes instantly, and I couldn't ignore the smile on his face or the light in his eyes just like last night. It undoubtedly erupted a storm within my tummy.
I watched as he pushed back his chair and strolled towards me. I kept my eyes trained on him as he stood in front of me. Before I could register, he was leaning down to me, and I jumped back as soon as I saw what he was doing.
I thought he would've been upset about my movement, but he just smiled brighter at me.
"I just wanted a good morning kiss. But I get it, only you are allowed to kiss me. I don't mind though" He said with a wink as he led me to the kitchen island.
I sat silently, trying not to focus on the three pairs of burning eyes on me as I poured myself a bowl of cereal.
"What?" I unintentionally snapped after it got too much for me. Cameron just chuckled as Alex and Alyssa rose an eyebrow at me.
"What's going on between you two?" Alex asked, sounding stern but I saw him hiding his smirk behind his mug.
"We kissed" Cameron and I said at the same time, and it was obvious that he was enjoying this.
My cheeks burnt red as I ignored Alyssa who was kicking my foot with hers, no doubt sending me a silent message to ditch breakfast and go tell her everything in my room.
"We kissed " I confirmed quietly, and Alex lowered his mug to showcase his smirk fully.
"Finally huh?" He asked and I whipped my head towards him with a glare.
"What do you mean?"
"Well it's obvious that you two have a thing. I was just waiting to see how long it would take before one of you crack" He elaborated, causing me to scoff.
"Nothing is going on between us, and nothing will. It was just a kiss" I said, and for the first time since I got here I saw Cameron's face fall.
I felt awful that I kissed him, got his hopes up and then shut him down again. It wasn't fair to him and I should really clear the air once we are alone.
I know for a fact that I feel strong emotions towards him and that kiss was better than anything I have ever felt. But I still didn't know if I can take it farther.
I am more than scared to.
The silence in the room was suffocating and I could feel all the pressure directed at me. I hated it, so I tried to manoeuvre the attention.
"What about you two? Why did you bring Alyssa to your room Alex?" I asked with narrowed eyes.
He rose his hands in surrender as he shook his head from side to side.
"I'm a decent guy Jamie. I gave her the bed and slept on the couch in my room" He said.
"So why didn't you just take her to my room?" I cocked my head to the side in genuine confusion and he gave me a lopsided smirk.
"Well seems like I would've interrupted something if I did" He teased making me blush again. I threw bowl in the sink and basically ran to the exit.
"I'm gonna get ready for work" I told them then directed my gaze to Cameron. "Um, will it be okay for you to take me Cam?"
He gave me a short nod, not once removing his gaze back from his omelette which he was just picking at. "Yea no problem. I'll just go freshen up" He said softly, making me feel even worse.
I needed to talk to him asap because I hated seeing him like this. All because I couldn't keep my word and keep my lips to myself.
Way to go Bob.
I took a quick shower and brushed through my hair that was still very much straight from last night. I wore simple skinny jeans and a polo shirt. I pulled on my sneakers and added a little lip gloss before migrating to the living room where everyone was.
"I'll take home Alyssa once she's ready, and I'll order take out for dinner tonight" Alex informed as I entered. I gave him a grateful smile and gave them both a hug before heading to the door where Cam was waiting.
We walked to the elevator in silence, and it was obvious that he was still upset. He didn't look angry or annoyed, just hurt. And it killed me.
"Um Cam..." I started as soon as we were in the elevator. "I'm sorry I kissed you like that last night"
"You are?" He asked, looking even worse than when we just entered. I suddenly realized how wrong that sounded.
"No no I'm not sorry that I kissed you, I'm just sorry I did without your confirmation and confusing you and all that"
"But I'm not sorry" He whispered. "I don't regret it and I would do it again without apology. I know you feel the same so please don't sweep it under the rug"
"Just let me take you on a date" He cut me off by saying, taking me completely off guard.
"Will you go on a date with me Jamie? Just one, and if you still feel the same way then I'll respect your decision. But please don't give up on us without at least giving it a chance" He said and I realized that the light was returning to his eyes, but this time it looked more like hope than admiration.
"I know I did some shitty things in the past, and I understand that you are scared. But I will never hurt you, and I'm just asking you to give me one chance. Just one, and then I'll let it be" He added, causing me to drift deep in thought.
I didn't want to say no.
Not because I didn't want to hurt him, but because I really wanted to try. I was still hell bent on my former decision about building and respecting myself, but it's just one date right?
Just like he said, I wanted this too. Even if the bigger side of me wanted something else, thirty percent of me wanted to have Cameron.
And I couldn't ignore it.
"Where are we going?" I asked with a small smile on my face, and I wished I recorded the look on his face when he heard me.
"I'll surprise you" He said excitedly then grabbed me in a hug. "You wont regret this Jamie. I promise" He spun me around and placed me back on the ground just as the elevator door opened, not once did his smile fall.
He said I wont regret it, and I really hope I wont.
It's just one date right?