2 YEARS LATER
I was now 21 and my little one was a year old and she was beautiful than the word beautiful. Ever since my break-out on Ivy our relationship has been on a steep slope and I won’t lie it doesn’t bother me at all, I tried to apologise to her but she shut me out. Miso and I broke up, nothing bad happened of such nature but we agreed to just end things and focus on our little one and we were better off that way and no little Kendra Iminathi is not the reason we broke up. I guess we just fell out of love if I could put it that way, but all I know is that I gave birth and for some reason I felt different about him. he’s still my best friend and he still loves me like the day he fell in love with me but we just better off the way we are I guess. Mom was a great grandmother and so was Yaya and Boobie.
What can I say, Kendra was loved by everyone… even Aya herself loved my daughter her brother’s daughter. Miso and I had occasional sex and we were good like that. I’ve seen Ester around but I avoid her at all costs. My brothers were amazing uncles and they spoilt Kendra too damn much for my liking. She had just finished washing and we were waiting for her father to come and fetch her, she was a gifted child, she was already talking and yet she was only a year old. I loved how quick she grew up because then it made things easier for me. Her: mom where’s dad?
Me: he’s on his way baby.
It was the weekend and we were going to Miso’s parents’ house for a braai, I don’t even know what they were celebrating but all I know is that Miso told me wash and dress up and be ready by 1:40pm. Missy was getting a little impatient and I am to blame for that because I
myself am a little impatient. We heard the car pull up and she ran outside Me: hey no running
she didn’t even hear me. I finished packing up the dishes and then a while later he walked in carrying his daughter. I swear to God this man looked yummy every time I saw him, it’s like he’s tryna get back at me for ending things between us by making sure that he looks all sorts of yum. He came to kiss my cheek Him: hey Buttercup
I walked out and he followed me with Kendra still in his arms
Him: sorry I’m late I got held up
Me: yeah sure
Him: don’t tell me you mad at me for being late by only two minutes
Me: I’m not
Him: you look gorgeous by the way
Me: and her perfume smells great on you
He kept quiet. I handed him Kendra’s things and then took my handbag and followed him locking the house. I got inside in the front while he was strapping missy in her seat. He played music and we drove in silence
Him: it’s nothing serious
Me: you don’t owe me anything Miso
Him: you the mother of my child and my best friend Buttercup
Me: Miso, its ok that you seeing someone.
Me: I want to know about her
Him: we not doing this Buttercup. We not going to discuss my sex life
Me: you said it yourself, I’m your best friend… might as well
Him: I wouldn’t want to hear about the guy you busy with because it would be uncomfortable for me to listen
Me: you the only guy I’m busy with so…
Him: when you do get busy with another guy I don’t want to hear how things are going because then it will make me jealous
I nodded and turned to look outside. I wasn’t jealous… ok maybe I was. I ended things because I’m scared of commitment. When I gave birth to Kendra I went through a phase, I didn’t want to see her let alone touch her for a whole week because I was scared that I might hurt her or something. they even recommended a therapist for me because I was so depressed and so scared. In that phase I ended things with Miso, I was terrified that I might become the mother Ester was to me. I wasn’t hyped up at all that I gave birth to a baby girl because in the back of my mind o always hoped for a son but
by God’s grace I overcame it all and I love Kendra more than life itself.
Him: you know I still have that ring
Him: I love you Buttercup and what we had was special. You can’t expect me to just get over you like that especially when we have a child together
Me: you’ll meet someone who will be better than I ever was
Him: what if I don’t want someone else? What if I want you and only you? You can’t expect me to just move on just like that
Me: but you moving on by seeing other people
Him: she’s not you. She’ll never be you
Me: then stop looking for me in her and try knowing her proper without having to compare her to me
Him: let’s just drop this please
I looked at my daughter who was busy playing with her teddy bear and talking to it. she was such a happy soul but also a cry baby. When she was still a baby she would cry to a point where I would cry too and nothing I did ever worked or would shut her up. I wouldn’t have made it without mom and dad and even when I came back to LA Miso had to live with me because she was a handful and Miso was always able to calm her down more than me.
Him: she’s beautiful
Me: yeah she is
Him: to think someone this perfect came from such dysfunctional people
Me: I’m not dysfunctional
Him: whatever makes you sleep at night Buttercup
Me: you lucky you driving otherwise I’d be all over you
Him: I can always stop the car
Me: sies you disgusting! That’s not what I meant He laughed
Me: always dirty minded yeses!
Him: what can I say, you bring out the dirt in me
I found myself laughing. This guy was something
else. We parked in front of his parents’ house
and then we got off. I was wearing a white off
shoulders maxi dress with a sandal and my hair
hanging loose with no makeup at all not even
lipstick. We walked in and went out back and
the family was gathered around the pool. Yaya
was wearing a bikini looking all kinds of sexy and
her husband was wearing swimming trunks and
he was sitting on the pool stairs. People here
were just carefree and dressed up for the pool.
Yaya came to hug me
Her: how are you?
Me: I’m good Mah and how are you?
Her: I’m good. Where’s my grandbaby?
I turned behind me and they were not there
Me: they were right behind me with her father Her: they must be somewhere in the house. You know where everything is Me: yes Mah, thanks
Her: ok cool
With that she left me and I went to greet everyone. Kyle’s wife was here together with Yanga’s wife and they were sweetheart. Aya’s husband was by the braai with MJ and Kyle. I went to sit next to Boobie. She was in her 80’s or late 70’s and she was still beautiful and a little aged.
Me: how are you?
Her: I’m good Buttercup and how are you?
Where’s my great grandchild?
Me: somewhere with her father or grandmother now. I don’t know anymore
Her: I still don’t understand why you and that boy don’t get married and raise that child in a stable home
Me: come on Boobie we spoke about this
Her: I got married when I was your age
Me: Boobie times have changed. We all want different things
Her: that boy loves you
Me: I know he does and I love him too
Me: we want different things. I’m not up for marriage and I can’t help but feel like if we got married it would ruin this relationship we have now
Her: that is childish and stupid. So what are these different things you want? Me: you know.
Her: no I don’t know. enlighten me please
I was saved by Kendra running to her Boobie all hyped up and excited wearing swimming
costume. She looked adorable as always. They greeted each other and had a conversation just the two of them. I decided to go inside to get myself something to drink. Miso was on the phone and it was on loud speaker he was in the kitchen talking to some woman
Him: I told you I’ll see you later
Her: don’t bother. All you care about is your baby mama and daughter
Him: of cause. I told you from the get go that they were my main priority
She just dropped the call on him and he banged the kitchen counter. I walked in Me: everything ok?
Him: yeah everything’s fine
Me: you sure
Him: why can’t we go back to the way we once were?
Me: we just can’t. It’s been a year now Miso. You have to move on
Him: I’ll move on when you move on
Me: I’m better off the way things are Miso. I’m not ready to let a man into my daughter’s life and have him mistreat her
Him: Buttercup you need to get help. It’s not right that you live in such fear
Me: I’m not living in fear
Him: you don’t want to let another man into
your life because you scared that he might turn
out to be a monster. You are scared that you
might someday become an Ester to Kendra. It’s
not healthy for you or anyone around you
Me: I will be fine with time Miso. Thanks for the
He brushed my shoulders and then walked out living me to do what I had come to do in the kitchen in the first place. I poured myself juice and then walked out to join everyone.