~One Month Later~
I was still finding it hard to wrap my head around things since that night. I didn’t remember much after I fainted and I hadn’t seen Uriah again since. I was starting to believe that I’d dreamed the entire thing. Why would he show up just to disappear again? Why would he want to confuse me like this? Or did he expect to come back and hurt me? Did he not believe that Damien and I would have stayed friends? I didn’t blame him for that one. Back then I was finding it hard to believe myself.
“I love you.” Kiss. “I love you so much.” Another kiss. I couldn’t help the giggle that slipped through my lips as his met mine again. I was on cloud nine and couldn’t stop smiling.
“You two are sickening.” Teased Damien from the front seat of the car. Tonight was a random double date night. Sophia had long since put her headphones in to drown us out and I felt bad for Damien. He deserved someone who would at least attempt to try to get along with his friends.
“Don’t worry Dame. I’ll still sneak over for late night kisses.” He joked.
“As long as she knows I had you first.” He teased back sassily. I couldn’t help the bubble of laughter that broke free from me as I listened to the exchange between the two of them.
“You two are some idiots.”
“Your idiots.” he smiled at me before leaning in to kiss the tip of my nose. I sighed happily. There were no words to sum up how I felt about this beautiful man. Just the way he looked at me had me curling into myself shyly. Simply holding his hand would warm me up on the coldest winter day. He was my everything. He made me feel like a princess. Like no one could take my place, but he had commitment issues. We’d been off and on so many times that I’d lost count.
I had no doubt in my mind that he loved me, but when it came to proving it he just ran. He talked a big game, but he sucked when it came time to show it.
“Hey Dame, one day soon our kids will be calling you Uncle.”
“As long as I don’t have to choose sides in y’all arguments. I love you both, but it will always be Leyah over you buddy.”
“Ouch. I’m hurt. No more late night kisses for you.” he joked as I rolled my eyes. He was making it clear that he wanted to start a family, but I was lenient. Every few months or so we’d break up and he’d disappear without a trace. We couldn’t do that with a child. We couldn’t bring a child into a life of ups and downs. Never knowing why mommy won’t stop crying or where daddy could have gone. It wasn’t fair.
“So when can I expect to go broke in a baby store?” teased Damien as I groaned.
“Not for a long time.” I spat. As I said it I felt the mood shift. All the love and playfulness had gone out the window. We were barely adults and this was something I knew he wouldn’t let go of so easily. It wasn’t that I wasn’t ready. It was that I felt he wasn’t and clearly it was going to be a problem. Tonight we’d argue and he’ll leave. That was the pattern.
It was always how things ended up.
Uriah: I didn’t mean to ambush you Ley. I didn’t mean to make you faint. I just wanted to talk. I miss you and even though you hate me you are still the closest thing I have to a friend. I know Damien will never forgive me,but I can’t live knowing that you hate me too. I need at least one of my friends back.
I had no clue how to go about all this. A part of me wanted to tell him to fuck off and continue pretending like he never existed me; but another part really wanted to hear him out. I was scared though. I’d been foolish before and believed in him. I’d been foolish to accept the call or text and ended up right back in love with him again. I feared that now would be no different.
I gasped as Justin came into the room scaring me. I felt numb because of him too. On one hand he never paid attention to me, now he suddenly knows everything. It made no sense.
“Are you really going to do this?” I cried trying hard not to sound desperate. No matter how hard I tried with him he still seemed disinterested.
“Come on Leyah. You know we were just going through the motions here. Don’t get me wrong that first year was amazing and I loved you completely but lately things ain’t been the same. You’re always at work or with Damien and I tried to deal with that, but now you have exes popping back up. I didn’t sign up for this Ley and I won’t do it. I’m sorry.” I didn’t even bother to say anything else as he kissed my forehead and left for good. I was sure after being left so many times it would just stop hurting, but I was wrong. It still hurt just as much.
Leyah: Why am I always the one that gets left? Why do I get hurt? Is there something wrong with me?
My emotions were laid out and I couldn’t control them. There was nothing I could do. It was too much on my plate. I was stressing too much.
Uriah: No no Princess. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with you. It’s us. It’s completely and always us. Being with you or just simply being around you is so blissfully amazing that it’s hard not to notice our flaws. For me it was like I was trying to be the perfect guy you wanted. To be it all at once and as soon as possible and when you shut me down and told me no it felt like I was less than. That is my burden. I had to learn to be happy with myself and when to seek improvement. I couldn’t force myself and what I wanted on you anymore. It wasn’t right. Leaving you the way I did wasn’t right. Hell leaving you in general was wrong. You were the best part of me and I was foolish to think otherwise. I was foolish to walk away from all that you are. I should want to be perfect. I should want everything with you and more. I’m sorry it took so long to realize that.
He was saying all the right things. I couldn’t deny it. Maybe that was why I did what I did next.
Leyah: You can come over. Passcode is still the same and the key is where I always put it.
Leyah: Also, don’t tell Damien.
… … … … … … … …
My back arched up off the bed as he went deeper inside me sending me into pure euphoria as I cried out in pleasure. This moment was everything that I needed and more. His lips pressed against my neck sucking harshly, definitely trying to leave a mark. He was doing things to me that my body had been yearning for.
The way my body molded perfectly into his.
How he suckled and bit my nipple.
The way his tongue felt on my pussy.
How with each stroke he went deeper.
How guttural his grunts sounded.
“Fuck I missed you so much.” he panted kissing me passionately. “I missed you so fucking much.”
“I missed you too baby.” I breathed. Even I could tell those words didn’t sound like I meant them. If he could he didn’t care. He just kept moving, giving me pleasure that I wouldn’t feel otherwise. I was finally numb and maybe sex with Uriah would be the cure to thawing me out again.