Chapter 17: Fear and Jealousy (Part 3)
“Hey Minnie.” I breathed finally gathering up just enough courage to say something. There were no words that I could use to describe what I felt just to be this close to her again. I could smell her everlasting strawberry scent wafting off of her even though we were still a few feet a part. It made me miss her more, and I’m man enough to say that it even gave me butterflies. Taking a moment to really look at her, I was even more at a loss for words. Her hair was wet with prominent curls. I missed her running her fingers through mine as she braided it for me. She’d always said how we had similar textures and admittedly, I’d learned how to do a few styles for her. If the guys knew about any of that, I’d never live it down, but I was starting not to care. She turned fully to look at me and I almost stopped breathing as my eyes continued to soak her in from head to toe. She was wearing a pair of black skinny jeans that seemed to hug her like a second skin. A white crop top that accentuated her bust in a way that made me want to cover her up in my jacket if I had been wearing one. White wedges with a single strap around the ankle helping to disillude the illusion that those legs went on forever. My favorite part was the thing she was trying to hide behind her back, her bracelet, but I’d already seen it when she first walked in. It made me smile, my own chain hanging visibly hanging around my neck. “We still think alike.” I pointed out laughing as she rolled her eyes. It was so easy to fall back into step with her.
I myself was wearing some black jeans, a white long sleeved shirt and some all white sneakers. My hair was also damp and hanging loose around my shoulders. We looked planned, as always, but it was purely a coincidence. I was blatantly staring at her hoping she’d stop biting back her smile. It had been too long and I wanted to see it up close. I missed it. It was like my eyes were finally opened and I could now see how perfect we’d be together... how perfect we’d look standing side by side. We were just so much alike. It was clear how well we’d fit together.
“Ir maybe we’re finally realizing just how much alike we really are.” she spoke, saying out loud what I’d only just started admitting to myself. “So...um, are you going to take me to get the tacos or not?” she questioned, finally bringing me back to reality.
“Oh! Yeah, come on.” I was embarrassed. I could be a little less open about my feelings seeing as she clearly didn’t feel the same. Nothing would get done if I was constantly getting lost in her or my day-dreams about her. “Minnie, are you coming?” I asked, scaring her a bit. She only blushed running past me as I laid. I guess day-dreaming was just another thing that we had in common.
The car ride wasn’t really ideal. The moment I pulled out of the driveway my phone began ringing like crazy. I was regretting now more than ever giving her crazy ass both some of my dick and my phone number. It was obvious that Maria wanted to know, but I just got her back and I wasn’t going to lose her again over momentary lapses of judgement. I wanted to talk about us, but she put her headphones on signifying it to be a bad idea to bring us up. That or she was trying to drown out the noise and for once I was a lot of noise for her. I needed to end this as soon as possible. Finally, we’d reach our designation just as my phone began ringing again.
“Go ahead. I’ll meet you in there. I need to return a call.” I could feel and see her hesitation, but thankfully she ignored it.
“Want me to order for you?” she asked. It didn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out that wasn’t anywhere near the question she actually wanted to ask. I smiled reaching over to grab her hand trying to ease whatever was going through her mind.
“Yeah, just get our usual. We can eat here if you want.”
“Doesn’t matter to me.” she shrugged before getting out of the car just as my phone began ringing again, I watched Maria walk away instead. Just waiting until she was far enough away that I didn’t have to worry about the monster inside of me scaring her. As soon as she was inside the restaurant, I answered yet another call coming through never letting my eyes leave her. Maybe I was imagining things, but she definitely looked more filled out than the last time I’d seen her and it only made me want her more. Had it been longer than I thought? Or had she become the embodiment of the term late bloomer.
“Why are you continuously calling me Clarissa?” I snapped pissed that she was interrupting the time I finally had managed to get with Minnie. It had been a struggle just to catch a glimpse of her and now that I had her full attention I was being interrupted and I hated it.
“Oh quit it Davie. You know you miss me.”
“I’m busy right now Clarissa, what the hell do you want?”
“You.” She giggled.
“Look, it was just a one time thing-”
“You said that last time.” She sing-sang interrupting me. “And the time before that. Do I need to go on? It’s been a year of last times Davie.”
“Listen to me and listen well. I don’t want you. I will never want you. You are only good for a distraction-”
“And if you want that distraction to stay a secret from your sweet little Maria, you’ll do as I say.” She snapped as I groaned. “Bye Davie, I’ll be calling you with details soon.” Click. I sat there shocked as familiar raged filled me, but I wasn’t that person anymore. I knew it was a mistake to go there with her again, but I never thought she’d blackmail me with it.
“Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!” I screamed pounding my fists into the steering wheel. I hated that bitch and the fact that I so stupidly and selfishly got myself involved with her. By the time I managed to calm myself down enough to get out the car, I had an entirely new reason to be pissed. Why was John here? Why the fuck was he sitting with her? What could he possibly be saying that was so fucking hilarious? Why was it so fucking hard to just have a moment alone with her all of a sudden? Now I was pissed and jealous, but I had no right to be. I had brought this upon myself and now I had to deal with it. I knew one day other guys would start to see how beautiful she was, but I’d hoped that by then she’d already be mine.
I mean that I’d be ready for her to be mine. I wasn’t ready yet and I didn’t want to keep hurting her because of it. I watched silently as they continued to converse, trying to wrap my mind over the absurdness of it without letting the monster rattling the bars of his cage out. It didn’t feel right with him talking to her and this was more than jealousy speaking. I watched him as he looked at his phone and that look crossed his face before getting up to leave. I got out of my car to wait for him. I was tired of Clarissa and him trying to play games and I wanted some answers.