Hot tears trickled down my cheeks,and I squeezed my eyes shut hoping to stop the tears from flowing. My stuttering breath and watery eyes remained for quite a long time,while i sat there unmoved staring at his picture.I was fine until now,but then while looking for my car keys I found this picture of Jay and all those memories, which i had buried deep down in my heart,flashed back in my mind and all my courage,tolerance streamed in the form of flowing tears.
"Your tears are special,please dont let them fall for something so worthless".
Jay spoke these words to me earlier when i had lost my job and had nowhere to go. He was the one who supported me, stood besides me when I was all alone,when the entire world had left me,he was there but then again,life made me helpless.You always told me that the bitter part of my life had passed away and that nobody could take my happiness from me. But death took it all away. You were my happiness and death snatched you away from me.
"Why,why always me?"
My words echoed through the room,as they hit the walls of the room and striked back piercing my heart. If he couldn't be mine,then why did he come into my life?Why did he make me feel so special and left me unworthy of anything?Why would he leave me when we promised to stay with me forever?Why is life always so brutal to me?
I was born into this world as a result of two drunkards,who met in a bar,spent a night together and together bore a girl into the world.I often saw my parents fighting over whose fault it was,Dad said mom wore indecent clothes so he couldn't resist his temptations. I hell didnt care whose fault it was,for sure it wasn't mine. It wasn't long until they separated and I had to live in a hostel where i lived quite happily,had friends who all were abandoned by their parents like me. As I grew up,old enough to leave the hostel and live on my own, i always struggled for finance not until Jay hired me as his secretary. We fell in love and got married, lived peacefully fpr five years. One night,I got a call
that Jay had been murdered by his rivals. That night i was shattered,i hated myself for letting him go alone.
Suddenly, a thought flashed through my mind,my body shivered as I managed to get up,climbed up the stairs leading to the terrace. I walked up to the edge,peeked down as my body trembled with fear. But then I looked itno the sky and saw a beautiful star shining brightly in the dark.I smiled,convinced that finally all my difficulties had come to a halt.
"I'm coming Jay."