“H-hush little baby..” I sniff, trying to close the door “don’t say a word,” the moonlight splits through the cracks in the door, making my porcelain figure glow “don’t s-say a-a word. P-pappa’s gonna, smash your face into the wall,” I whimper and then let out a choked sob wiping my face. The door widens and I cower back into the shadows sucking in a sharp breath “a-and if you try to run and hide,” I sniff again pushing my scruffy blonde hair behind my ear, slowly dragging my fingers through “Pappa’s going t-to take out your eyes,”
The door finally opens fully and I can see the mansion in all of its glory, the smoothed sandstone looked so bright at this time of night. It never seized to amaze me, I let out a small breath then crawl to the door frame and lean into it. I look to the sky and gulp, if you could see me, you would think I was a ghost. My sandy blonde hair went down to my calfs and was often unloved. I had light porcelain skin, the only colour I had was my eyes. They would often grow bright in the dark light the cat that climbs through the woods. I gingerly touch the birthmark on my forehead, and through my hair to my neck, my hands shake and I watch them, swallowing the growing knot in my throat.
Think of something else, Aria, don’t do it to yourself.
My attention goes back to that stupid mansion, all it did was make my shed look like nothing. I don’t mean a crappy home, I meant a shed, I was forced to sleep in here. Made from stone and logs, it got so cold in here, some nights I can barely bare it and I am forced to either make a fire or sleep in the laundry room besides to the dying embers. While he got everything, it wasn’t surprising that he was still working. It’s all he ever did. Besides, hurt me of course.
Like someone shoving me into a wall, the breath is knocked out of me and I can feel my anxiety attack beginning to stir “oh god, no,” I beg quietly. Don’t do it Aria, don’t think about it.
Don’t do it to yourself.
But I do, it all comes down like rain. I am being showered in my own self-hate. My fingers laced through my hair “stop it” My voice quiet as I remember what happened last night. That’s when it happens, Tears line my eyes and I bury my face in between my legs “s-stop” they whisper words in my head, rattling around like marbles in a bowl. “Please stop it” I beg to myself looking at the mansion, please, for the love of god, don’t hear me. The voices keep screaming and now I am screaming “s-shut up!”
I rock myself back and forth then scream again. the light from the rumpus room comes alive and soon a string of lights turn on and I know he would be here soon; “shush-shush-shush” I whisper and start to crawl away from the door, I try to stand but I only fall onto my knees again “go away, please, leave me alone.” I finally get the door shut and fall to the mattresses, I curl into a small ball and then hear him coming closer and closer. My heart begins to jump out of my chest, and I lose my breath.
My eyes shut tightly and I cover my ears but it didn’t block him out, the door is flung open and his dark shadow looms over me, from the door, he was taller than usual, he was angry—he was always angry “get up,” he hisses at me.
I knew it wouldn’t get better if I didn’t, I try to but I was shaking too much, I slip onto the ground and he glares at me “I said get up!” he screams at me, gripping my arms and yanking me up to my feet. The moon shows every detail of his face, dark brown eyes, bed hair standing on his head, then sharp jawline where anyone would cut their finger on, he glares darkly at me before pushing me outside. I stumble over my feet and fall down, he catches me before I hit the ground then slaps me back down. He kicks my side and I close my eyes, praying silently that he will just leave me alone.
My skeleton like figure hangs onto my dress and he kicks me in the stomach. Now on my back, he looks down at me, I don’t cry, because that makes it worse “now, Aria” he cracks his knuckles making me flinch “if I have to come back out here,” he grips onto my hair and pulls me up to his face “I’ll cut your tongue out. Grow up already!” I flinch once again “do you understand me?”
I nod vigorously “y-yes, s-sir” I stutter. He throws me back down and kicks me again. He turns and walks back into the mansion, I close my eyes slowly getting up from the ground, my bones were aching and I couldn’t feel my arm as I stand up. My head lowering in shame, that man, was my father.
Charles Timothy Blackwell.
He slammed the back doors so hard and loud, that the ground felt like it was vibrating, then as quick as he left the mansion goes dark. I turn around looking up to the woods, my heart plummets into my chest as I lock eyes with another, they were bright purple and seemed to lead somewhere else. What would they be doing in the woods? I look down at the barb-wire fence as it loops around and stops me from leaving. I gently put my hand between the barbs looking at the eyes again “he-hello?” I whisper. No response “who’s there?” the eyes blink twice then trail back into the woods. I swallow again.
A small part of me hoped it was someone who was going to take me away from here, it’s been forever since I have seen another person. I take a few steps backwards waiting for whoever was there to show themselves again, yet nothing happens. I spin on my foot only to hit the open door, I hit the ground with a thud and soon I passed out.
My eyes open as I feel snow touch my face, I sit up slowly touching my head, I groan in pain then slowly open my eyes, Ana makes her way toward me and I smile softly she kneels down and hands me a glass of water “they’ll take away the pain for now,” she pushes my hair from my head as I take the medicine “hurry my darling.” She warns, I stand up and walk towards the mansion, nervously tugging at the sleeves on my old, patched-up shirt.
There in the kitchen was the tray, I plait my hair back into a ponytail then pick up the tray, Mary snickers at me, I feel my lips shake and gulp. Making my way up the stairs, I walk towards my father’s room, I open up the door and nearly faint. Instead of knocking like I should have, I open the door, to a woman, who I have never seen before laying almost naked in his bed she cringes “who are you?” She says in some sort of accent I can’t put my finger on.
I stutter on my words and leave the tray in the small drawer before me “I-I am so sorry”
I begin to leave but then she calls out “Charlie, your slave interrupted” I shake my head, the door opens and he looks the same as last night carrying that look of hate.
My father glared deathly at me “I-I a-m so sorry” I leave the tray on the table and calmly walk out praying he will ignore my grave mistake. I was wrong once I heard him staunching behind me cursing my name he grabbed a fist full of my hair and tugs me back harshly. I whimper and touch the roots of my hair turning to him, shoves me into the wall and holds me there by my arms.
“You, stupid girl,” He growls “what the hell are you thinking?!”
I opened my mouth to speak but his appearance brought tears to my eyes “I-I” he slammed a fist beside me making me jump.
“Answer me!” He shouted and I winced.
“I w-was bringing your breakfast a-and I forgot to knock.”
His brown eyes growing black as he gripped my wrist “get out of my sight” he threw me hard against the wall and walked away.
Wait until he is out of sight before running off, now I know I am not meant to go into the woods but I am not staying in there a moment longer. My skirt catches on the fence I pull it off and run further until I reach the centre of it all. My knees buckle and give up on me, I hold myself up with my weak arms staring into the darkness of the woods, then up to the laughing trees.
They whistle and laugh as the wind rips through them.
I lean down and cover my face and sniffle, not daring to let a tear fall in fear “please leave me alone,” I whisper. It becomes silent and I slowly lean back onto my knees sighing “death would be less painful,” I mumble touching the scab on my elbow.
“Don’t be so sure,” says a voice