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The Rain

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Summary

Emilia Razzione is a complicated women who struggles to find her way out of an emotional maze she stayed stuck in for a long time. It started with the dangerous life style she's born into and got worse with her abusive mother. With ignoring and putting her emotions aside to take care of her seven sisters, Emilia lost so many important things deep within her she never thought she'd ever need, and even when she wanted to sort out the knot in her chest, things got bad around her and prevented her from finding her way to live those secretly dead dreams she buried inside her.

Genre:
Drama / Other
Author:
Abir
Status:
Ongoing
Chapters:
1
Rating:
n/a
Age Rating:
16+

The gravity

Have you ever felt ... Nothing?




Not the empty nothing, It's the too many emotions in one second that makes you feel... Nothing.

The overwhelming nothing.

For me, Feeling nothing is neither bad nor good, It's like floating. When I walk when I sit down when I lie in bed I'm always floating. I can't get the feeling of everything around me.

At first, you lose all the connection with the world around you for like few seconds to find yourself with no gravity in you, all of your emotions fly around with no order, Simply out of control.


In one moment I felt sad, shocked, scared, relieved, happy, angry, worried, and anxious all at once without "then" to organize them. they just exploded in me, and I ended up feeling nothing...

And with that, I stopped feeling...and for some reason, I just didn't care about it.


"Care"

how much love and affection that word holds between its letters.
Caring is loving...
caring is worrying...
caring is stepping over your needs to the best of someone...
caring is sleepless nights...
caring is working hard...
caring is tired smiles and lazy red eyes...
caring is sore feet...
caring is feeding and clothing.

And Caring is killing yourself for the sake of someone.

I did all of the above and more for my family. But mother chose the last one to show me she cared for me.

I was there when it happened. even in her lowest moments, she was scarily beautiful. I saw what she was doing, I knew what was going to happen and I didn't do anything to stop it.

I was sad to know what she was doing.

shocked at the scene in front of me.

scared for how her face calmly smiled till the last second.

relieved it didn't take too long.

happy that it's all going to end.

angry at the way it was all easy for her, even this.

worried at the way our lives would change the next morning.

All along, Even before that night. I knew something happened to me, something bad. I didn't care anymore, whatever I did was like a duty, something I had to do with no emotions at all, and slowly by time, I lost the feeling of anything and everything, I thought that I was no longer a human. Only someone told me otherwise and told me that, me realizing that something was wrong actually means that there's hope, and I'm still a human.

No one knows about what happened to me, and every time someone asks me I just say those magical words that make them stop digging any further and just smile in relief.

"I'm fine"

I love those words, I love how effective it is on keeping people away, cause I know if I'll tell anybody about this they will think I'm a freak and they would let my father send me away. so I kept it to myself. only I knew one day I'll have to tell someone about it because I know I need help. I know that there's something wrong with me and that it ain't right to stay like this, to stay emotionless. but to who I should run to?

Back then my sisters were so young and I didn't have time to be self-centered. my father needed me, he needed me to take care of the girls, he needed not to worry about us, he needed to recover, so I was there for him. I ignored my problems and kept them hidden in the back of my head so I can handle a big house and take care of 7 young girls, and I did manage that and I did a great job. but the nothing in me grew more and more and reached the edge of my sanity, but I fought it back, and when I was this close to recovering... That Nothing changed into something else.
...

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Further Recommendations

mellinscer: Really enjoyed this story

Sharlene Fielder: Amazing narrative of empowerment and over coming adversity. Great to see howling the story progresses and evolved. Glad to have you include that they sought professional help.

Justine helda: Trop addictif pour être bon pour la santé

Tracey: Thank you for really sweet loving story everyone don’t matter what size you are all deserve loving can’t wait to read more of your stories

Charlie : I love how captivating this story is I can't wait to see what happens next

Mya: This story is my first one on this platform and I and in love. I used to love reading but lost it and this story restored my love for reading. 100% recommended It has a amazing plot and story.

albaataide44: Me encanta la novela porque además tiene una narrativa muy buena, se la he recomendado a mis amigas

Sharlene Fielder: Thank you for sharing your caring story with us readers.

Elizabeth Blake: So far I can’t put this book down. I’m looking forward to what is to come.

More Recommendations

Ben: First off, as someone who is 38 and gay ftm at over 15 yrs this is very accurate emotionally. In early to mid 2000s as a teen I thankfully had great parents and sister and spouse at that time but that deep hatred, loathing, and disgusting looks is why I had to wait until 19 to even start the proc...

FiU: Zum Dahinschmelzen. Tolle Geschichte. Hoffe auf Band 2 über die besten Freunde.Bitte mehr Zeit für die Rechtschreibung aufwenden.

staceykilv: Another lovely story! Always love reading your stories 😊🥰

eotero945: Enamorada. Una pena haya sido corta pero suficientemente caliente🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵

Deleted User: The fact that the book ends before she even goes on the date/dinner is so frustrating. But Even though...I love your story and the rollercoasters it takes me on. 💚🖤🖤⚔☠😁☠⚔🖤🖤💚

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