All Rights Reserved ©

- Chapter 15 | Can't Use Pain To Heal



Rueben tried to use my weakness against me and he failed… this time. So now, I’m going to use his weakness against him.

If he wants to play dirty, so will I.

Nobody. And I mean nobody… Gets away with trying to hurt my little brother.

“Ana, what are you doing?” Brooke asks me as she walks into my room.

“What does it look like I”m doing?” I snap and she just stares at me blankly, used to my outbursts.

Taking a deep breath, I turn around to face her completely before apologizing.

“I’m sorry, Brooke. You know I don’t mean to snap at you.” I say gently before turning back towards my bed and the bag I’m packing.

Ever since my older brother died, my emotions have been all over the place. Especially my anger and it causes me to snap at people which I hate doing.

I’ve tried to get better at preventing it, but nothing has helped me except for fighting.

It’s the only thing that makes me forget about all the shit going on in the world and in my very own head.

“I know…” She says, walking towards me before taking a seat on the edge of my bed. “Please tell me that you’re not going to do what I think you are?”

Zipping up my backpack, I throw it over my shoulder and put my arms through the straps, tightening them as I look at her.

“You know I am.” I say and I just want to leave before she gives me one of her best friend lectures that I hate, but also know I need to hear.

“Why are you doing this to yourself? You haven’t even healed up from your fight with Rueben last night and you already want to go fight someone again?” She asks, pushing herself off of the bed before walking to stand right in front of me.

“I’ll be fine.” I say, stepping t the side of her so that I can walk out of the door, but she moves in front of me again, blocking my way.

“No, I don’t want you to go. We need to prepare for tonight.” Brooke tells me and I sigh because I know that she won’t stop trying to make me stay.

“Brooke…” I say quietly, looking into her eyes. “I need this.”

“Why?” She asks although I’m pretty sure she knows why when she’s gone through something similar in the past.

I feel bad for even saying this and bringing up the topic, but if I don’t clear my mind by fighting, then I’ll be even worse… “You know why I need this.”

She had a brother once too and he has also died. After his death she was never the same at least until Clay came into the picture.

No matter how close Brooke and I are, I know he’s her best friend. Possibly even more than me because he was the only one that had the ability to pull her out of that dark place.

For a moment, she looks away from me taking a small step back before facing me once more as she says, “I do know why Ana, but you need to learn that you can’t use pain to heal your wounds… whether they’re physical or emotional.”

Walking around her to leave, I stop and turn around once I’m in the door frame. Just as I was about to speak, she continued…

“Don’t fight tonight. Just let yourself heal and save yourself from that pain. Please?” She almost begs me and it hurts to see her in pain because of me.

Looking away from her and facing the hall, I say one last thing before I leave. “Maybe I’m not trying to heal because I already know that nobody can save me from myself…”

It wasn’t even night yet and the crowd was already huge by the time I walked down into the hidden fighting area of the bar.

Nobody noticed me as I walked in because all eyes were on the fight in the middle of the room, so it was easy for me to sneak into the women's restroom and change into my usual fighting outfit.

Walking out of the bathroom stall I just changed in, I look in the mirror and pull the mask that’s connected to my hoodie over my nose so that all anyone can see under the hood is my eyes.

Now that I’m ready, I think it’s time for me to release some stress.

I noticed that the current fight going on was about to end when I walked over to the bar and saw Andy.

He walks in front of me as I take a seat, but doesn’t look up from the current drink he’s making as he says, “What can I get for you?”

“Add my name to the list of fighters?” At the sound of my voice his head snaps up and a smile takes over his face.

“I would, but right now there is no list.” He tells me and I look at him confused. I thought they always scheduled fights and paired the people together?

“Every day between 3 pm and 5 pm no fights are scheduled, someone just stands up there and whoever wants can go and be their opponent…”

After giving him to let him know I understand he continues to explain, “The winner can either leave the circle at the end of their fight or continue fighting new opponents.”

With a smirk that I know he cant see, I reply, “Sounds great.”

Standing up from the bar stool, I begin walking towards the crowd when I hear him say, “Good luck!”

I glance at him over my shoulder to look at him as I reply, “I don’t need it.”

Then I begin to make my way into the center of the large crowd.

The sound of a bell goes off before I hear the announcer scream into the audience, “We have a winner!”

I haven’t made it to the front of the circle yet because there’s just so many tall buff guys standing in my way.

“Who’s next to take up our champion of the hour?” He asks and even though people are yelling in excitement, nobody is offering to fight.

“Anybody? Nobody?” Still nobody is offering to fight. Oh well, I’m so ready to relieve some stress.

“Me.” I say loud enough for them to hear and everyone in front of me turns to look at the person who wants to fight.

Slowly they start moving aside so I can finally make it to the center and see who my opponent will be and fuck.

I wish I hadn’t spoken up…

Thank you for reading this story here on Inkitt! It means so much to me!!

I am going to be starting an update schedule, but unfortunately it is not permanent. My main focus right now is still school, but I am going to try a schedule out and see how it works for a little while since I've been writing so much.
UPDATE SCHEDULE: Every Other Day (:
Continue Reading Next Chapter

About Us

Inkitt is the world’s first reader-powered publisher, providing a platform to discover hidden talents and turn them into globally successful authors. Write captivating stories, read enchanting novels, and we’ll publish the books our readers love most on our sister app, GALATEA and other formats.