No Heads Are Better Than One
We always want what we can’t have. Maybe its the exhilaration of disobeying or the danger involved with doing what you know will only end badly.
That’s how I ended up slumped on my couch and dreading the idea of facing the reality of my choices. People love forbidden things; Perhaps just to prove that they can do what they want and I was no exception. What no one ever considers is the consequences that follow their indiscretions.
Just as I was about to stuff another hot Cheeto in my mouth to temporarily dispose of the flavor of Jason’s cock haunting my lips the world demanded my attention.
I answered when the ringing became unbearable, “Hey, what’s up?”
“Hot new club opened and guess who got us in?” Sarah bubbly voice came through the receiver. “That’s right, this bitch.”
“Which one?” The sketchy side of town had been encroaching in on ‘respectable businesses’ run by ‘family men’ who secretly frequented the erotic establishments without their wives’ knowledge.
“That’s a surprise,” Sarah said, “Just be ready by seven.”
My internal hermit hissed at the idea of leaving the comfort of my apartment but when I tried to make my case I was cut off.
“No excuses. Squeeze your skinny ass into something sexy. We’ll be there at seven.” She was determined to get me out, even if it meant taking an ax to my door.
There really wasn’t a choice. “Fuck you.” I groaned as my pathetic life flashed before my eyes.
“Love you too.” She giggled and the phone clicked. I would give anything to be intimidating again. It’s hard to instill fear in someone who has seen you in a LED thong.
Having friends did have its perks; Instead of sitting at home and losing myself at the bottom of a quart of ice cream I was being dragged out by my hair and forced to mingle.
After eating the leftovers taking over my fridge I tried to find something to wear. I had never been much of a shopper. My mom used to drag me through the store for hours and wouldn’t stop until I was crying.
Needless to say, I kept clothes shopping to a minimum and I cursed myself for it. There was nothing sexy enough to fill the gaping hole in my self-esteem.
The bar crawlers would smell me a mile away. I finally settled on a fitted purple dress that I hadn’t worn since the office Christmas party when I discovered Mr. Farmer’s infidelity.
After seeing a shriveled man stick it to the nineteen year old desk jockey everything from that night just seemed dirty. Now I gazed at my toned ass in the mirror and decided that it looked good on me.
I quickly brushed my hair into a high ponytail and fought back the desire to change back into my sweats and binge watch old Friends episodes.
My temptation was cut short when someone started knocking on the door. I knew it was probably Sarah coming to collect the missing piece of the slut squad.
“Calm your tits I’m com-” My mom’s brooding stare met mine. “What are you doing here?”
She gave me one of her best smiles, “What a mother can’t come visit her daughter?” Her hands were full with luggage as she pushed past me and into my safe space. “Such a lovely little apartment. I never would have guessed since it’s such a dingy neighborhood.”
Her dark eyes wandered over everything in my life, carefully scanning for a reason to nag.
“Why are you here?” Thanksgiving was weeks away and she once compared living in the city to rolling around in a pigsty.
“I missed my little angel and after you said you aren’t coming down for the holidays I figured that I’ll come up.”
I rubbed my forehead as I watched her tornado into every room. “It’s not that I don’t want to come, I have to work.”
“Work at the job that you refuse to tell me what you do.” She waved her acrylic claws in my face.
The temptation to blurt out my career sat on my tongue. Her expression would be priceless but then I’d be left with hours of life lectures. It wasn’t worth it.
“Well,” I gave up on trying to send her away. She had already put on a pot of coffee in the kitchen and everyone knew the as long as there is coffee my mom wasn’t going anywhere. “I made plans for tonight.”
That stopped her in her tracts, “Male plans?”
“No, girl plans.”
“Oh well I can’t say I’m surprised. You always had your eyes on that one girl, Susie from down the street, who you always wanted to come out and play with you an-”
“Not like that.” I cut off the ancedote before it could get anymore awkward. “Friends from work.”
“Well if you feel that leaving your mother all alone after she drove so selflessly down here to see you if appropriate then you go right ahead.”
That was all the permission I needed. Before the last word could leave her pursed lips I had gathered my things and was at the door.
“Thanks, bye!” The door sealed off the nightmare waiting for me when I got home.
I ran into Kitty on the stairs, ” I Didn’t actually expect you to be dressed.”
“She said to be ready by seven.” I said.
Kitty grinned, “I was told that I might have to drag you out of bed.” She didn’t know how close she came to doing just that.
“I was sort of smoked out of my apartment,” Kitty gave me a funny look. “Forget it, let’s get going or else Sarah will have my head.”
A mischievous gleam sparkled in Kitty’s eyes as she led me down the stairs. “Believe me, you don’t have to worry about heads where we’re going.” She looked back only to wink at me.
Whatever they had planned, I knew that it was going to be an adventure.