"Loving someone who doesn't love you back is like hugging a cactus, the tighter you hold on the more it hurts."-Quote by Leo
Four months later...
"Move aside, I got it." I said, laughing at Leo because he can't cook.
"Look I'm trying here okay." He said. I smiled at him and butt bumped him to move aside. He smiled and just stood there and watched me.
"Okay, first we have to throw this away." I said, as I dumped the burnt spaghetti sauce into the garbage disposal. I looked at Leo and he had a disappointing look on his face. "It's okay, I'll teach you." He just stood there watching me. I put all the ingredients together and left the sauce to simmer. I pulled out a pot to start to boil water. I sat myself on the counter top and just watched the sauce. Leo came over to me.
"What are you thinking about?" He asked me. I looked up at him.
"Dante." I said. He looked down.
"Well, at least you know he is alive." He said.
Flash back two months ago..
My father called me to his office late in the evening. I was walking just fine by then and I was all healed up. I walked to my dad's office and he asked me to have a seat. He sat down at his desk in front of me. "What's going on dad?" I asked him.
"You received a letter today." He said.
"Okay?" I said.
"It's from Dante." My mouth fell open and I didn't know what to say. My father got up and came over to me. He handed me the letter and walked out of the room. I took a deep breath and opened the letter.
I'm writing you to let you know that I'm okay. I know your worried about me. I need for you to move on with your life because I have moved on with mine. I've realized in this time that I've been with Allissa, that it is her I love. I thought it was you, but I was wrong. I'm sorry I lead you to believe that I loved you. I'm happy where I am, so please don't try to find me. I know this letter might sound coerced, but trust me when I say, it's not. These are my feelings and I need you to respect them. I've already spoken with your family and they all know how I feel. Please try to have a good life and I hope you make it to Paris, it's beautiful in the summer. I will not contact you again. Please respect my wishes.
End flash back...
"Beth.. Beth?" I heard Leo calling my name and I looked up at him.
"I'm sorry." I said and jumped off the counter. I went over to my sauce and started to stir it.
"I know this is hard for you,but maybe it's time you did move on. You told me about Paris, why don't you still go with that plan. I'll go with you is you want me to." He said. I stopped stirring and looked up at him with a confused look on my face.
"You would go to Paris with me?" I asked him.
"Well yeah, someone has to watch over your ornery ass." He said. I smiled at him.
"You just want to look at my ass." I said, sarcastically. He tilted his head and smiled. I punched him in the arm and laughed.
"Ouch, you big bully." He said.
I dished up everyone's food and sat there in my chair watching Leo talk with my mother and father. My dad has been so busy with work lately and my mother has been just as busy with her fashion business. It was nice to have them home tonight, so that's why Leo and I cooked for them. Leo gets along really well with them. They would have to be with as much time as he spends here. The truth was at first I didn't believe the letter. I wanted to believe that he was only writing it because he had to, but after talking with Damon and Enzo, they convinced me it was the truth. For about a month after I was in a complete depression and Leo was the only one who helped me get through it. I've learned over these months that Leo has stuck around because he cares about me, and I know that I care about him. He keeps me smiling and keeps my mind off of Dante. I don't understand why I haven't completely moved on, but I haven't. I still have moments where he creeps up in my head and I get lost.
Maybe Leo is right, maybe I should really rethink going to Paris. I mean that's where I was headed before I met Dante. That's where my heart was. With Leo offering to go with me, it almost made it sound that much better. I just wasn't sure if I could actually have him give up his life here to move to Paris. It's not like we are a couple or anything, but I also wanted him around. Like I said he was almost like my comfort blanket. Like he was my way to relax when I got upset or stressed out. I was kind of being selfish about it. At that moment I didn't care.
Leo's phone went off and normally he ignores it, unless it's his boss. He took the call and left the room. My mother wiped her mouth and looked at me. "So what's going on with you and Leo?" She asked me. My father looked at her with a mouth full of food and then looked at me.
"What do you mean me and Leo?" I asked.
"Just like I said." She said.
"We're good, he is my friend." I said. I didn't know what else she wanted me to say.
"Beth you got to know that he cares about you. I mean a guy doesn't just stick around and watch over you for friendship." I just kind of blew her off. I didn't look at Leo like that. I never even thought about it like that. Could that be true? Is that the reason why he has stuck around? Great now my mind was going all kinds of directions.
Leo came back into the room and both my parents started eating again. Jerks. I said to myself. Leo walked over to me and bent down on his knees. I looked down at him. "I've got some work to do tonight, but I'll be back in the morning." He said.
"If your going to be working all night you need your sleep, you don't have to come back right away." I said. He looked at me funny, because for the first time in the last ten months, my answer to him has always been okay.
"I'll be fine, don't you worry about me." He said with his eyes scrunched. Okay I said to myself.
"Okay." He smiled at me and got up and left. My mother looked back over at me, and before she could say a word. "Don't start." I said. Both my parents just smiled and continued to finish their food.
I got up and washed my plate off and headed to my room for the night. I had a lot of things on my mind and I didn't know how to deal with them all at once. I just wanted to sleep. I got to my room and went too put on my pj's and crawl into bed. I turned everything off in my room and just laid there in the dark, begging for sleep to come. My mind kept thinking about Leo and what my mother said. The last thing I wanted was a new romantic relationship tight now. I was still trying to get over Dante and Dante has been the only man I've ever been with. I wasn't ready for a new romantic thing in my life right now, but I also didn't want Leo to think I cared about him like that. I cared about him very much so, but just not in that way. I was afraid if I told him this he would leave. I didn't want him to go away. He had become my rock and I needed him to help me stay together. I now how selfish that sounded and maybe I was.
The next morning I woke up only to find Leo asleep in my chair. I laid there watching him. I looked over at the clock and it was only eight thirty in the morning. Thanks to my mother, I was now looking at Leo in a different light. Instead of just seeing my good friend, I was now realizing that there was a possibility that my good friend cared mare about me than he was letting on. I didn't move as I laid there in my bed eyeing Leo. "If you take a picture it will last longer." He said, not opening his eyes.
"How the hell did you know? I haven't even moved around yet." I said. He yawned and looked over at me.
"I could feel your eyes on me." He said. He stood up and walked into the bathroom.
"How long have you been here?" I hollered out.
"About two hours." He said.
"Did you even go home and get any sleep?" I asked. He didn't answer. "Leo?" I called out. He walked out of the bathroom and sat next to me on the bed.
"No, but I slept in that chair for about two hours." I just shook my head and scooted over some. I pulled him down to the bed and made him lay down. He looked over at me as I covered him with the blanket.
"Go to sleep Leo." I said, as he watched me. He yawned and closed his eyes.
"I'm not tired." He said. I just smiled and giggled to myself as he started to snore right away. I took a deep breath and realized what my mother was saying. I knew now that he cared about me, a lot. My heart felt sad, because as much as I didn't want Leo to go away. I just didn't see him like that. I loved Leo, but I loved him like I would my best friend. Not that he wasn't a beautiful man, because he was. I just couldn't get past Dante. I know that he is out of my life, but something in the back of my mind, was still holding onto him. I hung my head, feeling completely guilty. I reached over and kissed Leo on his forehead.
"I'm sorry." I whispered.