Dr Chalmers was a very intimidating, severe looking woman. With a blonde bob cut so perfectly the ends looked sharp and thick framed, square, black glasses, she oozed professionalism and a no nonsense attitude. Her room was a typical therapy room; white, lots of couches and a table in the centre with a blossoming orchid for decoration. True to her word, she had her afternoon free and the first part was spent letting Samson and Jamie interupt each other by updating her on their entire history with Jordan. The subject of their conversation sat in a bright corner of the room, playing with a nanny, in a similar uniform to Stefania, indicating she came from one of the vampire childcare companies.
Throughout the whole of Samson and Jamie’s story, Dr Chalmers took notes and listened, not once interrupting. Samson was used to such a technique, having employed it himself several times; it was Jamie that was falling under it’s spell, finding the silence too hard to resist filling. He started self diagnosing himself as a neglectful parent, questioning materialistic purchases to replace affection, residual guilt over the ‘abandonment episode’ and yet also saying maybe he is smothering Jordan in a way of atoning. Samson leaned back on the sofa he and Jamie were sat on, crossing a leg over the other and resting an arm over the back of the chair, tantalizingly close to Jamie. With a sly smirk, and a brief glance at the Doctor, he got comfortable to watch. The fact that she was letting Jamie waffle on, put his own fears at rest. Knowing people as he did, he was sure she wouldn’t indulge Jamie’s need to purge all his inner thoughts needlessly unless she knew what was wrong with Jordan and had a way to help. She was just going to make them work for it.
“I’m sure he is trapped in headspace because we have damaged him.” Jamie said despondently. Pausing to take a gulp of water, it quickly turned into skulling the entire glass and gasping into the silence. Just as he took a breathe to delve back into his parental failings Dr Chalmers stopped him with a palm in the air.
“I think, your last statement has an element of truth Jamie.” She said.
“It does?” Samson jerked upright, no longer lounging languidly.
“It does?” Jamie echoed, surprised.
“Jordan is using headspace to escape from a traumatic experience and retreat as a coping mechanism. He has lived a large part of his adolescent lift as a loner, loving no one, having no stable shelter. You have provided both a loving family and secure home and Jordan finding out that loving and losing is painful has caused him to enter a more simple mindset that you also offered.”
“So how can we get him out of it Doc? We wanted a baby in headspace but we still want our Jordan back too.” Samson asked seriously. Glad to know they were right to be concerned.
“The simplest way, if it works, although painful, is to rewrite his memory of the event that has scarred him.” She explained.
Jamie was aghast. “We have to go through abandoning him again?”
“You suppose that to be the memory that has him fearing the real world?”
"You obviously don’t?” Samson asked the Dr.
“What would you presume, Samson, to be the event we need to modify in his mind?”
“I would have agreed with Jamie. That if, as you say, he is trying to avoid unpleasant feelings then us leaving him would be the worst. It certainly was the lowest point I have had since we took Jordan in.” Samson looked to see Jamie nodding his head as well.
“Hmm.” Dr Chalmers looked at the both silently for a moment. “That memory speaks more to you both for the residual guilt you feel and turmoil it also caused within your own relationship. But consider this: that sequence of events and it’s happy resolution was down to Jordan and him taking control of his life. He should be proud of such a moment. Why would he give up the control he fought so hard to obtain?”
“So then what is making him mentally regress?” Jamie almost pleaded.
“I mentioned that you two feel guilt over leaving him. Do you suppose there has been a moment that has caused Jordan to feel guilt?”
Samson leaned back in the lounge to consider the Doctor’s words. Jamie looked downright worried, fidgeting nervously - especially as the silence grew longer.
“N-no.” Jamie finally stuttered into the expectant silence.
“Samson?” The Dr asked.
“Well I can’t think of anything that he should rationally feel guilt for.”
“Emotions aren’t rational. By guessing, you’re not judging him or even suggesting that that is how he should be feeling.”
“Well, if it was me in Jordan’s shoes, I would feel responsible for Jamie’s shooting.”
“What?! Sammy, you can’t say that. It wasn’t his fault.”
“Now Jamie, I just told Samson this is a safe space, you have to let him voice his opinions. And for what it’s worth I think he is right.” She held a hand up again to stop Jamie from arguing on behalf of their son.
“Let me explain. I’m also not suggesting that Jordan’s feelings are justified - in fact they’re not, but that is how humans, and all us supernatural beings behave. He blames himself for your injury. Because if it wasn’t for him, would you have been shot?
However, from everything you have told me this afternoon, the shooting was a catalyst for you too Jamie. That moment solidified you as a parent and I don’t know if you’ve even realised it, but since then you have hardly left his side. Or shall we say since you were reunited, you two have not been apart. So your bond has become as strong as Jordan’s relationship with Samson. Except where Jordan sees Samson as invincible - you on the other hand are vulnerable. And therefore, to protect himself from the unimaginable thought of losing you, he has left all his grown up behaviours and responsibilities behind in exchange for also throwing off his worry for you.”
She let those words sink in. Noticing that both Jamie and Samson let their gaze wander over to Jordan. He was playing quietly in the corner, almost oblivious to their presence as the nanny kept rolling coloured balls towards him.
“But he has been fine. He’s not clingy towards me, and apart from going into headspace - I mean before that as well he was...happy.” Jamie was visibly shaken by what they were discussing but his eyes remained locked on Jordan.
“We can appear happy, Jamie and be feeling many different things all at once. The mind is so complex. What if I could show you a little of how Jordan feels?” Dr Chalmers kept her voice soft to help Jamie process. She nodded her head at the nanny, pointing towards the hidden door in the wall and they all watched, Jordan included as the vampire stood up, ruffled Jordan’s hair affectionately and slipped into another room.
“Samson, I want you to go and say a quick goodbye to Jordan - how you normally would if you were at home. Then follow Lindsey through the side door, and wait 2 minutes before returning.”
Samson looked a little puzzled, followed the directions, leaning down and simultaneously lifting Jordan up to give him a quick kiss and cuddle, murmuring a quick “see you soon, pup.” Into his sweet smelling hair. Then without a backwards glance went through the side door and closed it softly.
Dr Chalmers and Jamie watched Jordan as he followed Samson with his eyes, saw him disappear and then after a few more moments, looked over to glance at Jamie and resumed playing happily.
Jamie waited in silence, avoiding eye contact with Dr Chalmers and pretending to admire the vibrant, abstract painting on the wall. He breathed a faint sigh of relief when Samson returned and sat by his side on the couch.
“Now, Jamie, could you please repeat what Samson did?” Dr Chalmers smiled kindly at Jamie as she asked him.
Shrugging, Jamie rose and copied the same steps, muttering ‘Be right back Jordie’ and went through the door. Jordan also mimicked his earlier actions, watching Jamie go through the door and turning back to Samson. This time though, instead of returning to play, he crawled part of the way towards the door, whimpering slightly. When Jamie didn’t immediately come back, Jordan’s anguish became plainer to see when his cries increased and heartbreaking “Dada’s” interrupted the sobs.
Dr Chalmers indicated with a nod for Samson to go to him, which he did, picking him up instantly. Jordan snuggled into his chest but didn’t calm down. It wasn’t until Jamie popped back through the door, worried at the sounds of crying he could hear did Jordan react. He almost flew out of Samson’s arms in his urgency of getting in Jamie’s.
Point made, Dr Chalmers didn’t need to say much. Instead she let Jamie rock Jordan to sleep in his arms, Jordan’s tiny hand clenched around the neckline of Jamie’s shirt. Once they were resettled on the couch she explained her thoughts on what to do next.
“So we have to make him relive this trauma?” Jamie wasn’t impressed.
“It will be painful at first, you need to try and keep all the details identical from that night to confuse Jordan. Then by changing the outcome you rewrite the ending to an alternative he can live with. If it works, it really is for the best as it will cure him completely as opposed to drugs or regular therapy.
Samson looked to Jamie and shrugged - it wasn’t as if they had a better alternative. Dr Chalmers noticed their acceptance and let Samson and Jamie take the lead in nutting out a plan.
Jordan woke up in the darkness, noticing that he was nestled in the big bed between Papa and Dada. He felt Papa shuffle and then heard a buzzing sound on the bedside table. Papa sat up, listening on his phone and then leant over Jordan, pressing him back down onto the mattress as he shook Dada awake.
“Hmph” Dada grumbled. “Jamie! I’ve just had a call from the power plant. I’m going to have to go over there to fix it?”
“What time is it?” Dada sounds still half asleep. “A little after 3am. I’ll just go get ready in the bathroom then head out. Sorry, I woke Jordan up.” Papa said.
“That’s ok, come here Jordie, we can snuggle ourselves back to sleep.” Big strong arms pulled him close and he burrowed into the warmth blissfully and was asleep almost instantly.
It could have been seconds or hours later but Jordan was instantly awake at the sound of glass breaking. His whole body surged with adrenaline racing through his veins yet he physically couldn’t move from the terror. Was this another dream? A nightmare? He saw dark creatures at the window, their faceless bodies coming towards him and Dada on the bed.
“Hand over the vermin and no one gets hurt.”
“Midget!” Someone from the far side of the room stage whispered.
“Midget. Right. Hand the midget over and no one gets hurt!” The intruder repeated.
"Donoghue! What are you doing here?”
“You’re all alone, bitch. No Alpha to protect your little ass. I’ll happily cause you bodily harm, so hand over the human.”
“No. He’s my son. Over my dead body.” Jamie reached forward to protect Jordan, bringing him closer to him.
Jordan saw the gleam of metal extend from the still half hidden figure and a flash of light burst forth in slow motion. The bang was the same as in all his nightmares - deafening, and he was powerless to stop it. Dada had reached for him and together they both hit the ground on the other side of the bed.
Jordan’s mind told him to do something. He could hear a high pitched, shrill scream so loud it was hurting his ears. It wasn’t until he felt he couldn’t breathe did he realise it was coming from him.
“Dada! No, don’t die. Don’t die.” He sobbed. His tiny hands moving furiously up and down Dada’s body, looking for the wound, for the blood.
“Jordan. I’m ok. Look at me. I am ok.”
Through the tears he didn’t realise he had shed, he could see Dada, laying on the floor awake. He was calmly explaining again that he wasn’t hurt. Jordan couldn’t believe his eyes. There was no blood, no pained, pale, sweating face unable to keep his beautiful eyes open. Jordan crawled up from Dada’s midsection, laying across the top of his chest, pretty much sitting on his throat. It gave him the ability to reach his hands onto Dada’s face and reassure himself he was indeed uninjured.
“You aren’t dying?”
“No little one, I wouldn’t leave you or your Papa.”
“I was so scared!” Jordan couldn’t hold it together, the relief flooded his system and he sagged against Dada, sobbing uncontrollably. Big strong hands cuddled him tight, rubbing his back, not letting go. For whatever reason, the range of emotions, or the security he felt by being held by Dada, Jordan couldn’t keep his eyes open a second longer and fell into a dreamless sleep.
Samson had found watching the reenactment almost unbearable. Tucked away in the bathroom, he couldn’t play an active role but could clearly see the sheer terror portrayed on Jordan’s perfect tiny features. The young lads they had asked to play the Donoghue pack were relatively unknown to Jordan, however being so young they were botching it up - Jamie had not been able to exactly recall that much, but what he had conveyed to the boys, they were forgetting!
Finally, with some prompting from himself and the fake shot from their stun gun, the script seemed to continue on and most importantly it seemed to be working. Jordan was talking to Jamie after his initial ear piercing screams. Once Jamie had a tight hold on him, Samson was able to creep out of the ensuite and quickly injected Jordan with a mild sedative - the poor mite too distraught to notice the prick or sting if there was one. Instantly his eyelids started drooping and within a full minute he was fast asleep, passed out on Jamie’s face.
“Right lads.” Samson spoke softly just in case Jordan woke. “Out. Let’s hope your performance was enough - it might have helped if you had paid more attention earlier.” He was gruff, understandably so, given the helplessness he had felt watching them.
“Thank you.” Jamie said pointedly. “We appreciate you helping us. It couldn’t have been easy.” He stared at Samson, silently admonishing him with a look.
“Yes thank you.” He tacked on.
The boys seemed too intimidated to make any excuses and eager to be gone, used that as a dismissal to rush through the doors of the master suite.
“Do you think it worked?” Jamie asked, moving Jordan to a cradle position in his arms, a dead weight not even stirring.
“I guess we won’t know until the morning. We’ll have to see if he talks, acts like a teenage baby or is still in headspace. I didn’t give him the full dose, seeing how he reacts to sedatives. Hopefully we can get at least a few hours sleep.”
Jamie moved into the nursery and put Jordan down in his cot, covering him tightly with a blanket and watched for a few minutes as he continued sleeping peacefully.
Jordan woke slowly, rubbing his eyes with the luxury of free, unrestrained, unmittened hands. He felt...unburdened, somehow. He stretched leisurely and opening his eyes, got a scare and half as two huge werewolves were hovering with anxious expressions over his cot. Catching his breath he smiled up at the two giants, whom he could safely say, were the 2 people in this world that he loved the most.
Large hands picked him up carefully, as if he were made of glass but then both of them crushed him to them, so much so, Jordan was unsure who he was actually holding him up there.
“Good morning pup.” Papa kissed him on the top of the head.
“Good-” Jordan had to stop himself from returning the greeting. Groggy, hazy thoughts and memories invaded as he remembered the rules he had agreed to when they signed his official adoption papers. He also recalled the last few days and how he had totally accepted being a baby and how enjoyable that had been. Unsure of how to act, or if he had even got himself into trouble, he grinned sheepishly up at Papa.
Both Papa and Dada were looking down at him expectantly - those concerned faces having returned.
“How do you feel?” Papa asked.
O...ok?” Jordan dragged out.
“You just seemed to have had a rough night.” Dada chipped in. “Do you need to talk about anything?”
“I don’t think so?” Jordan was so unsure, all his answers seemed to come back out as questions.
“That’s fine then.” Dada reassured him. “Do you remember the last few days?”
“Sortof. It’s all a bit blurry.”
“You went into headspace!” Papa said. Except you struggled to come back to us. So as happy as we were to have a real baby, we missed our feisty Jordan more."
“You can go into headspace when you feel comfortable to do so, darling. We just don’t want you to stay there. We never wanted a real permanent baby or we could have adopted a wolf pup. We wanted you - to love you in all the ways we have been able to so far. Do you understand?” Dada was running a hand up his back as they spoke, never once breaking physical contact.
“Of course.” Jordan was a little confused by their intensity.
“Are you sure you’re ok?” Papa wasn’t convinced. “Anything we can do? Anything we can get you?”
In the only way Jordan knew how to diffuse the tension, he took the risk of pushing it too far and replied.
“You can get me off? My balls are aching!”
The gamble paid off. Papa laughed his loud bark, head thrown back and his chest heaving so much it was making Jordan jiggle in his arms.
“Oh I missed you pup, there’s my spunky, smart mouthed baby boy. I got you a little gift days ago - what’s say we test it out?”
He led them back into the main bedroom, passing Jordan over to Jamie so he could rummage through the drawer Jordan had long since found out held only a small selection of sex toys. Whilst Papa was busy, Dada didn’t waste anytime stripping Jordan down to nothing, idly toying with his erection.
Papa came back with only a small looking flashlight, fitting in his enormous hands so easily it was nearly impossible to see exactly what it was. When he got close, he tossed it gently onto the bed next to Jordan. Next to him, it wasn’t so tiny - and it was exactly a flashlight. The handle was ergonomically shaped like one but where a lightbulb would normally be, there was a bulging puckered arsehole. It didn’t take Jordan long to realise he would need both hands to hold this device and it was human sized - perfect for him to actually sink his cock into a tight hole for once. His own dick twitched and if possible hardened even more at the thought.
“What do you think pup?” Papa had been keenly watching Jordan discover his new present. A smug smirk lighting up his gorgeous face.
“Um...it’s cool. Can I use it now?”
“Yes, here and now, on the bed. I can’t wait to watch you.”
“What about you and Dada?”
“Oh don’t worry about me.” Papa smirk grew even wider as he sat on the edge of the bed. “I’ll enjoy watching you, but your Dada is due a bit of time on his knees - but I’ll try and keep pace with you, what do you think?”
Dada didn’t say a word, he just winked at Jordan and kneeling down, positioned himself inbetween Papa’s outstretched legs. Papa grabbed a fistful of Dada’s hair, pulling him roughly down onto his crotch, making Dada moan. Jordan turned, so he could watch them and wasted no time in positioning himself at the entrance, trying to slow down his own pleasure by inching in slowly. It felt too good, so tight, hugging itself to him, so he pulled back and thrust in hard, as far as he could go. He groaned with passion as he experienced the full pleasure the toy had to offer and the erotic sight of Papa, keeping his promise and matching Jordan stroke for stroke. They tried to maintain eye contact and Jordan continued to withdraw almost all the way before ramming himself again and again. Eventually he became too lost in his own throes and closed his eyes blissfully as he pumped himself to an explosive orgasm, collapsing facedown onto the plush bedding, spent, puffed and exhausted. He felt the mattress sag as Papa fell back, their heads almost touching and satisfied smiles mirroring each other.
“Don’t you two lazybones even think about going back to sleep!” Dada was standing at the foot of the bed, hands on hips. “Jordan needs breakfast and Sammy you aren’t at all prepared for the pack meeting.”
“Shit. He’s right. Come on Jordan, you at least get it easy. I’ve got work to do.” And with that Jordan went back to being Jordie the baby, diapered and in a pale blue onesie, ready to explore his new found ability to go into headspace - just with a little more self control this time.