Unwanted

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Shame

I sat there confused not entirely sure I belive what had just happened. But it had. Xane didn't stop. He waited until I was shattering in his arms my only thoughts of him...

I shuddered feeling suddenly very soiled. Any other girl might be afraid to be home, afraid to shower. That's the thing though; when you've been obsessed with someone so long. They can do terrible things and you forgive them.

Then again I also knew Xane. He wouldn't come find me again. If I had said stop, really said it- he would have.

As I showered it wasn't until I cleaned my sore vagina that I started to crumble. Yes I had wanted him, maybe it hadn't started like that. I did though. Now that I liked a guy.... Was he punishing me? Or actually intrested? Would he have sex with me and then no longer care? Did I want to have my first with him?

The thought made me shudder. Xane fucked girls and then made himself scarce. As much as I wanted to no longer to be his gofer I didn't want us to end things like that.

A bang on the door jolted me back to reality- the water had grown cold and I was in the tub curled up in a ball.

"Hey I need to take a leek."

Same old Xane...

"One sec." I called back before flipping off the water and throwing on a towel. As I exited the bathroom he didn't even look at me.

Like what he did had never happened.

That's what hurt.

As he shut the door to the bathroom my gaze lingered at it. Nothing had changed.

He wanted to play that game? Fine.

If Josh bothered him that much and me not doing stuff bothered him fine. Even if it ment my virginity I'd go out with a bang.

Then I would be rid of him forever.

Josh was sweet but I wasn't attracted to him and I felt bad for using him. But in this case? This was war. Josh was just a casualty.

At least thats what I was convincing myself. Who knows my feelings might change. He was nice enough and we did seem to get along.

Sorry for my cousin. I texted Josh in my towel retrieving it from the living room.

Its ok he's pretty cool. Just wished I could have sat next to you.

The text he sent made me smile as I walked back to my room. Xane saw me exiting from the bathroom. Looking at my phone. Smiling. Ignoring him.

Check fucking mate asshole.

I slammed my door behind me.

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