Femme Fatale

The quiet autumn rain was pouring down from the sky, laid a grey blanket over the city almost as if it wanted to stop time from moving. It would be nice if that would happen, and time decided to slow down at least. I sat behind my desk, cursing Heaven and Hell for playing with me again. Haloween was coming up, and my alcohol supplier was arrested for tax evasion. I tried to call everyone who I ever met, and might have the requested contacts but nothing, nada. I had only a week until the party, and we were running out of alcohol. It was just typical it happened with me.

I leant back in my chair, rubbing my temple as I started to feel a headache sneaking up on me. My eyes closed as I started to make a list of the people who might be able to help. I was hoping if I thought hard enough I’d realize I missed out someone. Let’s try this again, I ordered myself with a growl.

I straightened up and leant closer to the computer screen. I must find someone. Failure wasn’t an option. I couldn’t be left here with no alcohol for one of the busiest time of the year. I was practically beating the keyboard in front of me when a soft knock made me look up.

“Good afternoon, Kat,” Kelly, one of the waitresses smiled at me as she opened the door slightly. I could hear music from the lobby. There wasn’t a quiet corner in this place except for my office that was sound proof for various reasons.
One look at the girl in the door and I knew someone picked her attention. Not that it was hard to get it to be honest. Her face was flushed, her nipples were poking through the thin fabric of her pink lacey corsette. She was playing with her hair to keep her hands occupied, stepping from one foot to the other, rubbing her thighs together.

“Yes, Kelly?” I sighed, raising an eyebrow. If she wanted her girltime, this wasn’t the right moment. I was completely drawned by this alcohol issue. I knew her way too well that it would take more than five minutes to listen to her drooling over her newest love interest. God save the poor bastard who was going to fall for that girl.

“Master Logan here would like to talk to you,” she said the name “Logan” with such an awe, I thought she would swoon there, and then. However, hearing that name had an entirely different affect on me. It made my stomach clench. I shouldn’t have had that reaction after so many years. It angered me that a simple name could do such things to me.

I shook my head annoyed with myself, and thought it was surprising to have a guest so early in the afternoon on Monday. That was the only day of the week when we opened at 9 pm. All the other days we were open 24/7. I didn’t have time for this but a new member meant more money, and money we needed all the time that was for sure.

„Of course, send him in, please,” I said, moving my eyes back to the screen. I was almost done with the list in front of me again, and no new supplier yet. If I had to pay more than normally, we would be in deep crap, and I’d be very frustrated.

„Hallo?” I answered my phone, hoping it would be someone saving the day, and for a change, it wouldn’t have to be me.

„Have you found a new supplier?” Jeremy, an old member of the club, who owned a place himself, and worked with the same closed company asked impatiently.

„I believe I told you I would let you know if I did, Jeremy,” I replied, not even trying to hide the annoyance in my voice.

„I just thought I would…” He stattered, nervousness echoing through his voice.

„You thought wrong, I will call you if there is anything,” I said irritated, ended the call quickly right at the moment when he walked into my office. I almost dropped my cell, my mouth hang open as I saw the name belonged to the last person who I ever wanted to see again.
My stomach made a twisted turn upside down, and gave me the thought that I might throw up right then and there. My heart missed a beat, my brain decided to shut down and forget to breath. On the top of all of that I could feel the familiar tug in my stomach and down what I hadn’t had years ago. At this point I wanted to scream at myself but I had to gain back my sanity.

No wonder Kelly acted the way she did. Logan Hunter was still the dream of any sane woman. He still looked like a man who jumped off from the cover of Men’s Health. The passing years only did good for him. His tall figure made the office feel so small as if it was jewellery box size even though he was still standing in the door his presence was everywhere. The black shirt covered his well built upper body but it required not much of a creativity to guess he was still rock hard underneath. His face became even manlier, his jaw stood out, his light brown hair softened his features a little bit, his green eyes popping out from his suntanned skin, searching my face as if he was trying to see my soul. That wasn’t going to happen, I vowed.

“Hello Katharina,” he said as he took a step towards my desk, and closed the door behind him. His voice was just as deep and husky as I remembered. It was haunting me for years, in my dreams, in my thoughts, didn’t let me forget the gentle, and the harsh orders it delivered, covered my naked body as it was velvet and leather.

“Don’t sit down, Logan. You aren’t going to get a membership in my club,” I stated firmly as I crossed my legs more because of the fact that I tried and make the ache go away than in an act of defense. His eyes followed my movement with knowing eyes.

I didn’t have to put up with him, or his Superman vision, and sixth sense. I was the owner here, and I had the power. If he thought he could dance in here, and take everything he wanted again, he was way wrong.

“It’s impressive what you built here, Katharina,” I hated the way he said my name. It felt like he slapped me in the face with full force and caressed me with the gentlest touch in the same time. “I always knew you’d grow into a succesful, independent woman.”

As expected despite of my warn he took a place in front of me. His eyes roamed over my body, gave me goosebumps all over, made me feel like I was naked.
I was used to such looks, it was something that happened everyday. If you worked in the indrustry where I did, you had to deal with the hungry stares day by day, something what you had to get used to.

Still, this was different. That look not only made me feel naked physically but mentally as well. Probably that I was stressed out didn’t help my case. The last thing I needed was additional problems for the current one. I had to get rid of him sooner rather than later. I couldn’t let him get under my skin.

It boiled my blood that he dared to come here after all he put me through. I wasn’t in need of his praise. I was well aware by myself that indeed, it was a great achievement that I ran a place like Femme Fatale, especially at my age. Not many single, 24 years old woman could tell that they ran a BDsM club. For some it was difficult to believe that a pretty, innocent face like me lead people to the life where they could live out their most sinful, darkest fantasies.

“Sweet talk isn’t going to help you, Logan,” I narrowed my eyes and crossed my arms over my chest. I was happy that I was still in my daytime clothes. The T-shirt I wore covered my hardening nipples that were seeking attention desperately under the fabric. My denim shorts thick enough to cover any evidence of my betrayal body.

“You should learn to take a compliment, girl,” he looked at me hard, my face turned into scarlet. I let my hair cover my face, tried to save myself. I didn’t want him to think he had the upper hand.

“I don’t need your compliments,” I glared at him, more annoyed with myself than him. More annoyed with the fact that an apology spiced with a sinful “Sir” almost escaped my lips.

“But you need me,” he smirked arrogantly, leaning back in his chair.

I wanted to answer him with a nasty cursing, and tell him off like no one did before but there was a knock on the door again before I could start. Kevin, one of the waiters peeked in coyly.

„Excuse me, Miss. I know you told us not to bother you but, but…” he stuttered nervously without actually looking at me.

I told him several times that there was no need to address me as “Miss” but it was like talking to the wall. If only I had dominant tendencies, I could have beat it into him.
If I’d waited for him to finish, we would have been there even at the next Haloween. Kevin was new in the club. I was happy to hire him. He was only 20, very inexperienced, very shy, definitely someone who had a lot to learn but I’d always been willing to give a chance for anyone. How could they learn otherwise?

„Kevin dear, would you please say what you want?” I asked, trying to reducate the edge in my voice down as much as it was possible. I was completely on the verge of throwing the table on Logan for what he did in the past and for what he was doing with me now and his stuttering only raised my impatience even more. But again, I didn’t want to scare the boy, he was already rather afraid of me anyway.

„Mr. Lasser is here again, and wish to talk with you… I… I told him that you were very busy…” He explained, his face turning more and more into a shape of red.

„Has Chris arrived yet?” I asked slightly irritated.

Nick, Mr. Lasser was one of our newest members, one of our newest clients to be exact. He never made it through the 3 months of probation time. He made a scene two times in a row. I was very strict about my rules. You might made a mistake one time, the second, you were out of the club.

First he got drunk, and made a huge scene. We put him into a cab, and sent him home. The second time it happened, he also dared, and harassed one of the girls, that is the least thing I tolerated. The day after I talked to him, let him know he was not welcomed anymore. He didn’t see to get the message.

„N-no, Miss,” Kevin shook his head.

Amazing, so I had to deal with this myself as well. Chris was man closest to me in the last few years, my best friend. I hired him at day one when I bought the club to be the bouncer. He was loyal, reliable and the best listener in the world. Usually he was in the club almost 24/7 but today wasn’t one of those days as he took his new sub for a date.

„You have to give my money back, slut,” I heard Nick yelling from the other room.

I did not appreciate when people called me names, at least not in context like that. He signed a contract when he decided to try and become a member, a contract where he agreed, he would not get back his money, even if he got kicked out in a week.

Logan moved his eyes to me, his hands getting into fists as he rised from his seat. I knew that look way too well. I saw it before that night when it happened, when he ruined me for good. I was 17 years old, reckless, and rebellious. I felt like the whole world was against me. It wasn’t easy to be the daughter of an ex Marine and the sister of a soldier with no female who could understand a young girl as my mother had died when I’d only been 4 years old.

Logan was the best friend of my brother, Ryan. I’d had a love and hate relationship with him. Another soldier in the family had been nothing but a pain in the ass, no matter how hot he’d been. His attention had been just as suffocating as my fathers or my brothers even if he’d often defended me. I’d have never admitted to anyone, especially to myself that I’d been drawn to him like a bee to honey on a warm sunny day.

Then one night I’d pushed it too far. I’d been home alone. As expected I’d gone out, dressed like no decent woman should ever dress and picked up a college guy. When we’d gotten home he’d pulled out a small plastic bag from his pocket with a few pills in it. I’d never been interested in drugs but I hadn’t wanted to look like a chicken so I’d agreed. I’d also hoped a little bit that it would let me enjoy sex truly for the first time. He’d said it would be the best if we’d taken it a bit later, once things got hotter. It had taken no time of course. We’d been kissing wildly, my top already off me, his hands worked on the buttons of my shorts. I’d quickly started to get frustrated as I’d felt like there’d been a feeling missing.

However, before we could have gone further the door opened and Logan had stood there in all of his masculine glory, next to him my guy had seemed like someone who had just left kindergarden. I’d jumped off from the guy, my whole face turned red, felt ridiculously humiliated that I’d been caught like that. Logan hadn’t say a word but walked past by me. I still had no idea what he’d said to that guy but the poor thing looked like he’d been threatened with a long and painful death. His face had turned scarlet red, and he’d left without a word.

I’d swallowed hard, knew way too well that I’d been in deep shit. I hadn’t dare to look at him. I could have felt his eyes spearing me up alive even with my back to him.

“Come here,” he’d said in a quiet but without a doubt commanding voice. I’d willed myself not to move. I hadn’t wanted to face him. I’d felt like I’d let him down. Despite of my terrible behaviour he’d always stood by me, and tried to soften my dad and brother towards me. “I’m not going to say it one more time, Katharina.”

It had made me shiver as my name left his lips. He’d never called me that before. Though, it had been also true that I’d never heard him talking like this before. It had sent a shiver over my spine, and I could feel some moisture between my legs. I hadn’t understood how it had been possible to get turned on at a nonsense time like that.

I’d walked to him with uncertain steps, my heart had been beating so fast and loud it had felt like my entire body had been a terribly loud drum and bass song.

“Look at me,” I’d bitten my lower lip, taken a deep breath, slowly moved my gaze up to him. He’d seemed to be even taller then if it had been possible. His eyes had been as dark as the lake next to our house when the summer storm had decided to start a war with the poor souls living in the woods. “Did you take any of that shit?”

I’d shaken my head, dropped my eyes to the floor again. The truth had been that I was happy that he’d arrived before I could have. It had been the stupidest idea ever but I’d wanted to... I’d wanted to have some fun and really enjoy what I’d been doing.

“I haven’t heard the answer, girl,” I’d raised my head and glared at him, thought it was mortifying enough that he’d stomped in while I’d been making out with someone but he’d given me a look that had made me regret past and present sins as well.

“No,” I’d said probably a tiny bit louder than I should have. I’d seen a hint of relief and annoyance crossing his face at the same time.

“Why did you do it?” Because I hadn’t wanted to say no, because I hadn’t liked this guy enough but I’d wanted to fuck him regardless, because I’d been chasing something, not even knowing myself what it had been and thought this might be the answer. There had been no way I’d have given that answer to him.

“This can go down two ways, Katharina,” he’d said as he’d gripped my jaw roughly, made me look at him. “You’re going to tell me one way, or another. I’ll force it out of you if I have to.”

“You wouldn’t...” I’d swallowed hard, stared at him in disbelief. He’d been the best friend of my brother since I’d known my mind. There’d been no way he’d dared to harm a hair on me. It must have been an empty threat. He couldn’t have possibly been serious.

“What’s it gonna be?” He’d asked as he let go of my face and took a step back. I couldn’t have stood his stare, it had been so demending and so unsettling. I’d rather kept my eyes to the floor, felt my face burning with anger, humiliation and with something else. “Katharina, why did you do it?”

“Because I wanted to and I could,” I’d screamed at him in frustration. I’d wanted him to leave me alone, I’d wanted him to stop making me feel so small. However, in the same time I’d wanted the opposite, the last thing my body had wanted had been him leaving me alone.

The look I’d seen crossing his face was the most terrifying and the hottest thing I’d ever seen in my life. I’d realized he’d meant that he’d force the answer out of me but it had been too late. He’d acted so quickly I’d barely had time to process what had been happening. He grabbed my arm and turned me around and the next thing I’d known that his hand had landed with full force on my ass again and again.

My brain had been racing in crazy circles. This had been not happening with me. Logan hadn’t been spanking me in the middle of our living room. The grip on my arm had been so hard, I’d thought it would leave bruises. I could have felt my butt burning under his touch, sent shivers upon shiver through my body, the wetness between my legs had become unavoidable. The pain his actions had caused had run through my body like I was shocked with electrics. The air was filled with the loud noise of his palm slapping my buttocks with merciless power and my screams that had come from a such deep place even I hadn’t known it had existed.

“I’m going to ask again, why did you do it?” I’d tried to catch my breath. His voice had been invading my mind, it had almost been as if everything had stopped existing and it had only been him and me. My brain had been clouded with such mixed feelings I’d had to try and hold onto my sanity with all my strength.

“Fuck you!” My voice hadn’t been familiar to my ears, it had been rough and shakey from all the screaming. I’d hold my head high, and set my mind that I’d have taken whatever he’d wanted to. I couldn’t have possibly told him that I hadn’t been able to enjoy sex with anyone so far.

“Alright then,” he responded with a threateningly calm voice. I’d thought it was impossible to hit harder but I’d been proved wrong. Those few more movements of his hands made my body turn into jelly between each slap. It had felt like each and every of the slaps somehow found it’s aim right to my core and to my clit. The need in my body had grown to the point that I’d thought I’d come standing there. My legs had been shaking so badly they had barely hold me up. My brain had had to fight to be able to process what had been happening, all those mixed feelings, everything had felt so confusing and so clear at the same time.

“I wanted to be fucked and enjoy it,” I’d screamed finally, felt like a rock was taken off from my chest, and I could have breath again. It had felt so liberating to say those words. I’d almost felt weightless right until the moment I’d realized that I’d told him those words. He’d let go of my arm, and I could have felt his eyes in my back. I hadn’t dared to look him in the eyes. What could have been he thinking of me?
The silence had been so heavy it felt like a mountain sized rock was weighting down on me. I hadn’t even realized but tears had been running down on my face, tears of... not pain but something else... like those tears had been stuck in me for years and they only had found their way out then.

“Turn around,” Logan had commanded but his voice had turned somewhat softer, almost understanding. I hadn’t wanted to comply. I hadn’t wanted to be lectured about how foolish I’d been. “Katharina,” he called to me again with a tiny bit firmer.

I’d turned towards him, chewed on my bottom lip, felt the salty tears against my lips. I must have looked like a mess with the amount of make up I’d had on my face.

“Look at me,” he’d said softly, tilted my chin up, made the decision for me to be able to meet his gaze. He’d towered over me like a giant and his eyes… God, he’d eyed me like a hungry wolf eyed an oblivious rabbit. “Are you still a virgin?”

I’d shaken my head, not dared to look him in the eyes. Lord, I’d hoped with all I’d had he hadn’t wanted to tell to Ryan. My brother would have killed me, and then hunted down all the men who’d had me.

“I want you to answer me loud in full sentences, Katharina,” his voice had turned hard again, and I’d seen his fists tightening.

“No, I’m not a virgin,” I’d said, forced myself to say the words out loud instead of whispering them again. I could have told easily that he’d been not pleased with the answer. His eyes had darkened again scarily.

“How many have you let to use you?” My eyes had narrowed instantly by that choice of words. How could have he said something like that?

“No one has used me, Logan,” I’d glared at him, crossed my arms over my chest as I’d taken a step back. I hadn’t been some kind of object for anyone to use.

“For you it’s Sir, girl,” he said with a dangerous growl as he pulled me back to his body, hold me so close I could have felt the heat radiating from him, and shockingly also his bulge pressing against my stomach. “Now answer the question. I’m running out of patience.”

“Four,” I groaned, angry that I’d let him force my deepest secrets out of me. He’d given me a hard look again, and I’d realized he hadn’t liked how I’d phrased my respond. I hadn’t understood why it had bothered me that feeling that he hadn’t been happy with me. After what he’d done I should have been gone, call my brother, scream for help. But for my biggest surprise I hadn’t wanted to do any of those things. “Four men fucked me, Sir.”

He’d closed his eyes and taken a deep breath, let go of my arms almost as if he’d been worried that he’d have hurt me. I’d watched his chest rising and falling as he’d seemed to fight an inner battle with himself. I could have killed to know what had been playing down in his mind.

“Tell me how it felt when I spanked you,” I’d turned my head away, refused to keep on with this game he’d been playing. I’d contemplated to just say that it had been the worst experience in my life. “And don’t lie, I can smell your arousal, your nipples are so hard that they’re ready to make a hole into your bra, and you keep licking your lips in a way that would make any man put something else in there without asking.”

I’d stared at him in shock, bit my bottom lip consciously before I’d realized that most likely doing anything with my mouth could have possibly ended up with the same result. My first thought had been that he wouldn’t possibly have done something like that but then I’d remembered that I’d had the same thought not long ago, and I’d been proven wrong big time.

“Stop thinking so much,” he’d ordered. It had been easier said than done. How could have he expected me not to think when he’d asked such intimate questions? What had been the point anyway when he’d already known the answer? “Just say what first comes to your mind, be honest.”

“It felt... it hurt but the pain seemed to be different than what I dealt with before,” I’d said, tried to choose my words very carefully. A part of me had kept telling me that I could trust him but I’d still been confused about everything that had happened in the last few minutes.

“Different how?” He’d nodded, his eyes hold my gaze. He’d been watching me in a way that had made me feel like that even if there had been bombs flying around us, he’d have still only concentrated on what I’d had to say.

“It went right to my core... each slap if you know what I mean,” I said, cleared my throat nervously. I hadn’t been used to sharing such thoughts with anyone.

“I might know, I might not. You have to be specific, Katharina,” he’d cocked his head to the side, waited for me to give that darn specific answer.

“It felt like those slaps all went right to my clit. Are you happy now, Sir?” I’d hissed the last word, glared at him as I’d tried to ignore the burn in my face.

“I wouldn’t go that far as being happy with the tone you used. I’d watch it if I were you, especially if you want that ache to go away,” he’d warned. I’d stared at him with wide eyes. Had this meant what I’d thought it meant? Could it have been possible that he’d take me?

“What... what do you mean?” I’d asked, a feeling in my stomach grown again; something between anticipation, excitement, and something even more.

“I mean if you use that tone again, I’m going to leave you here with your hands tied behind your back, and I’ll only come back in the morning,” he’d answered, and I’d had no doubt whatsoever that he’d meant every word.

“What if... what if I’ll be... nice?” I’d asked, desperation echoed through my voice as if I’d been saying a shakey pray to the sky to save my soul.

“If you’re good,” he’d breathed, leant over me, his lips only a breath away from mine. His hand had slipped into my shorts, fingers pushed hard against my soaked panties, made me feel so lightheaded I’d been worried I’d faint. “I’m going to fuck you so hard that you’re never going to forget,” he’d stopped for a moment, watched my reaction as he’d moved his finger to my clit, pressed hard against my swollen part. I’d had to hold onto his shoulders as my knees had been ready to buckle under me in any moment. “But you’re going to have to do exactly as you’re told. Can you do that, Katharina?”

“Yes, yes, Sir,” I’d panted heavily, my mind had been so clouded that in that moment that I’d have been ready to sell my soul to the devil just to get a release.

“Good girl,” a ghost of a smile had touched his lips for a moment, and as those words had left his mouth I’d felt like I’d been covered with warm sunlight all over my skin, and inside. I couldn’t understand why I had such reaction but at that point I hadn’t cared anymore. The only thing that had hold my interest was his gaze had offered the type of predatorish look that had made my stomach clench, and sent more hotness to between my legs.

His lips had pressed hard against mine, used my gasp to enter my mouth. It had felt like his tounge had devoured my entire being. It had been lucky he’d slipped his hand to the back of my neck to deepen the kiss because I’d have possibly couldn’t have hold myself up. I’d arched into him without hesitation, silently begged for more. His fingers had stroked me through my wet panties, driven me crazy despite of the fact that he hadn’t touched me yet. My entire body had been on fire, ready to explode in any second. I’d unbuttoned his black shirt with shaking hands, hungrily touched his bare skin under my fingers. Then he’d stopped, withdrawn his hand and taken a step back.

A sudden rush of anger had invaded my body. My hands had turned into tight fists. A shudder had run through my body but it had been more because of the frustration and the missing heat of his body than excitement. I’d been so close to the edge that a few more seconds and I’d have finally had my long awaiting release.
He’d been watching me close, obviously waited if I’d had anything to say about his actions. I hadn’t been about to give him the pleasure to know how desperately I’d craved his touch. I hadn’t wanted to go as low as begging even though, deep down in my heart I’d known that it would have taken less than a look to cave my will.

“Strip,” he’d commanded, dropped his shirt to the couch while he’d kept his eyes on me. I’d complied without hesitation, thought finally, he’d give me what I’d wanted more than anything.

I’d unclipped my bra, let it drop to the floor over my arms. It had been followed by my shorts, and finally, my panties. I’d stood there naked in front of the man who I’d known in my entire life however, in that moment it had felt as if he’d been someone entirely else, someone who hadn’t seen me as a kid anymore but as a woman who’d had needs. It had been strange how coy I’d been suddenly. I’d been naked in front of other men before but it had never had this affect on me, never made me feel so vulnerable, or so aware of being a woman. I’d been playing with my hands anxiously, not entirely certain what I should do with them, in the end I’d decided to put them behind my back. That decision had been rewarded with a pleased look what I hadn’t understood at the time but just like before a wave of warmness had washed through my body as a result of it.

He’d started to circle me slowly, his eyes burnt into my skin. I’d been breathing heavily, felt my juices flooding between my legs, my entire body pulsed with a need that had been unimaginable for me before.

“Red seems to fit you well,” he’d said and run his hand softly over my bare ass, reminded me of his palm landing on it unstoppabely. The skin had still been sore, his touch had made me feel like thousands of firey needles envaded my body, a moan had escaped my lips as I’d felt like all of my body pulsed into one single location, made it impossible to form thoughts anymore. “You’re perfect, Katharina,” he’d breathed against my skin as he’d pushed my long red hair over my shoulder.

His strong hands had fondled my breasts while his lips had found the soft spot on my neck and sucked it hard, my head had fallen back to his shoulder. He’d pushed against me, hadn’t let me forget I hadn’t been the only one impossibly turned on. He’d pushed me gently towards the couch, hadn’t lost the contact for a moment. “Sit down and spread your legs,” I’d let out a sigh of relief, thought finally, he’d do as he’d told earlier and my mysery would end. Instead of taking me though he’d decided to kneel in front of me, pushed my legs wider, and started to lick my wet folds. My hips had moved up to him, needed more, his tongue pushed inside of me, reached muscles I hadn’t known existed before.
My back arched from the couch as my body had trembled under his lips. I’d started to play with my nipples, softly pulled and twisted them, got lost in the sensations, my eyes closed when suddenly he’d stopped again.

“Have I told you to touch yourself?” He’d asked with an edge in his voice. I’d almost started to cry in frustration that he’d stopped again.

“No, Sir,” I’d groaned, dropped my hands next to me, hoped for all I’d been worth for that this would be enough to make him have mercy on me.

“Put your hands above your head,” he’d ordered strictly. “And no coming until I tell you so,” he’d said and with that he’d sucked so hard on my clit that my entire body had tensed and what left my mouth had no longer been a loud moan but a scream that if I could have thought, would have made me worried someone might call the police.

My vision had blurred as he’d turned me to lay on the couch. I could hear the tore of the bag of a condom from distance but my mind stopped functioning by the time. Every inch of me had been on the edge, made me think that I couldn’t possibly take more. I’d been laying there panting, my legs opened wide, offered myself without any second thoughts. He’d moved between my thighs. I could feel his cock against my wet folds. I’d lifted my hips to meet him, wanted to feel him inside of me more than I’d ever wanted anything in my life.

“Look at me,” he’d commanded in an almost gentle tone, kept my gaze as he’d hold down my hips, not given me a chance to move to him meanwhile he’d pushed himself against my clit. “Tell me what you want.”

“Fuck me, please, Sir, fuck me,” I’d panted, desperation echoed through my voice as my body had shaken with need. I hadn’t had enough brain cells to rationalize what had been happening anymore. All I’d known that I’d needed him to take me as I’d needed air to survive.

A half smile had crossed his face before those few long awaited words had left his lips. “Come for me,” and with that he’d pushed into me so deeply I’d seen stars in front of my eyes. I’d screamed out his name, hold onto him for dear life, my nails caught his skin, probably left marks that would remain for a few days. Pleasure previously unknown for me had washed over my body with such force I’d thought I’d lose my consciousness. I’d felt muscles moving inside of me that I hadn’t even realized existed. He’d started to move, thrusting into me with hard moves, my body had taken over control of me, I’d followed his movements without thinking. He’d pushed in and I’d lifted my hips to meet him, needed him to be as deep in me as it could be possible. I couldn’t tell if I’d come many times, or it had been one giant orgasm that lasted for long minutes. Each time I’d thought my body had enough he’d thrusted into me so deep, hit that exact spot that pushed me back into that spiral again and again. He hadn’t given me a moment of rest; his hands had been twisting and pulling my nipples roughly, his teeth sank into my skin as he’d pushed me further and further into the world of pleasure and pain. I’d heard him cursing under his breath before I’d felt his body tensing under my hands, muscles become hard as rock as he’d pushed into me with one last powerful thrust as he’d found his release deep inside of me, wrapped around with my tightly squeezing muscles.

“You’re unbelievable,” he’d panted heavily against my lips before he’d pulled out of me, and dropped the condom into the trashbin.

I’d laid there, not able to move. Aftermath had followed aftermath. My body had been shaking as it had never wanted to stop again. I’d been so cold as if I’d just escaped from the North Pole where I’d only wore a bikini. It had felt like I’d been in a bubble where everything had been silent and serene. It had been something entirely new for me. I’d never thought silence could be so relaxing, or that I could reach the point of no thoughts on my mind. I’d felt as weightless as a feather as I could fly away by the softest of breath.
Logan had put on his boxers before he’d disappeared into the kitchen. I’d watched him in awe as he’d walked back with a glass of water in his hand, thought, I could have never gotten tired of looking at that perfectly built body.

“Drink,” he’d handed the glass to me. I’d drunk it up quickly, realized my mouth felt like the desert. His eyes had been glued to my face, watched me with such intensity as if he’d tried to see right to my soul. “Good girl,” he’d smiled at me before he’d taken the glass, and put it on the table.

I’d shuddered again those few syllables had given me another wave of aftermath. He’d grabbed a blanket, laid next to me and wrapped it around us. His arms had gone around my waist, pulled me close to him protectivly.

“You did amazingly, Katharina. You may rest now,” he’d said soothingly, placed a soft kiss on my lips before I’d fallen asleep in his arms with feeling such peace, satisfyment and wholeness that I couldn’t even imagine before.

That had all I’d gotten though, that one single night of peace. When I’d waken up in the morning Logan had been long gone. I’d felt betrayed and used. Not a single note had been left behind. Despite of how I’d thought it to be humiliating, I’d tried to call him several times but his phone had been turned off.

Months had past but there had been no news about Logan. My rage had grown with each passing day. I’d started to go to college in the autumn. I’d spun out of control. I’d had a different guy for each day. The reason for that had been simple. I’d wanted to punish him, wanted to prove that I could get anyone I’d wanted, wanted him to see that I hadn’t needed him, that that night had gotten no affect on me. I’d wanted him to see what he’d lost when he’d come back to my life. There’d only been one aim in front of my eyes, and that had been to make Logan Hunter suffer as badly as I’d done.

I’d spent Christmas break at home. It should have been like any other holiday with my father and brother. It should have been... But life had decided to take a terrible turn. Ryan had arrived home with a haunted face. I could easily tell something terrible had happened. I’d felt a knot in my stomach as I’d waited for him to tell me what had happened. His best friend died, he’d said. I’d felt like my world had shattered. My anger had been washed away instantly, replaced by such sorrow that had made me feel like I’d been suffocated. Those had been the worst day of my life. I’d been going through the motion constantly. Tears of agony had alternated with tears of anger. Rage that I couldn’t have confronted him about what he’d done, fury that he’d dared to die before I could have had revenge and mainly that I couldn’t hate him anymore, that I couldn’t have been angry at him anymore.

I’d spent almost an entire year feeling numb, merely existing. I’d become one of the walking deads. I’d attended to school, gone back to my room, and just laid around all day, lamented about how I’d ended up where I’d been. I’d known I should have tried and got out of that state but in a morbid way I’d enjoyed diving deep into that suffer. Until one day I’d gotten a phone call from my brother that had changed everything again. Logan had been alive. He’d arrived home with not a single hair harmed on him. That news had fueled the fire in me again. My rage had come to life again, raised from the ashes of my broken heart like a phoenix raised from the dust. I’d made up my mind that I wouldn’t try to contact him. If he’d wanted something, he’d have had to come to me. Of course, he hadn’t even given me a phone call.

That time filled with all that panned up frustration had turned my attention into a different direction; the direction of a world full of forbidden acts and needs; the world of BDsM. And that time, there’d been no turning back.

„If you’d excuse me, you’ll have to wait a second before I could kick you out,” I smiled at him sweetly, rage grew in me as I walked out of the office. This son of a bitch chose the worst day to try and mess with me.

He tried to come against me right away, reached for my throat. I grabbed his arm, turned it to his back, and pushed him against the wall hard.

„Now you listen to me, asshole,” I growled. „You signed the contract, agreed to all points. I said you weren’t welcome here anymore. Next time I see your face, you will be taken by the cops, understood?”

I twisted his wrist slightly, made him groan in pain, and stopped him from try and get out of my hold. Everyone who knew me for more than a month was aware of the fact that I didn’t take disobeyance and insults lightly. I lived my life by rules, and I expected nothing less from my clients, or employees. One had to be dumb to try and cross me.

„I asked something,” I said, twisted his wrist just a little more so my point would get to that tiny little thing into his head that some might call a brain.

„Yes, Miss,” he groaned in a small voice. His face was all red by the humiliation and anger he obviously felt by a woman holding him against a wall literally.

„Good boy. Now get out of here,” I let go of his wrist, and took a step back. I watched him walking out, and let out a sigh. This day really couldn’t be any crazier. I heard Kevin and Kelly letting out a sigh of relief as he disappeared towards the exit, and the door closed behind him.

„As impressive as ever,” Logan stood there leaning against the door frame of my office, a slight amusement playing over his face. One down, one still to go.

“You may as well follow him,” I stated, firmly. The club was my sanctuary despite of all the issues I had because of it sometimes, it was the best thing I had in my life and now he poisoned it.

“Are you sure you want that?” He raised an eyebrow, a smirk appearing in the corner of his mouth. “You need me, love.”

“Okay, listen to me, you arrogant dick,” I growled, stepped up to him while I tried to ignore the knot in my belly caused by that last word. He had no right to call me that ever. “I’m going to tell this one single time, and I want you to understand,” I had to try my best not to raise my voice but I set my mind that I wouldn’t let him strip me out of my self control. “The last thing I need anywhere near my club, my life, or around me is your pathethic self. Is that clear?”

“It’s absoulutely clear that you still have no idea what you need, girl,” he smiled tauntingly. I was getting confused by that confidence. I started to have a feeling he had a reason to act that way. “I have a supplier. If you give me a membership, I give you the contacts.”

I gasped and took a step back. My eyes closed as I took deep breaths to somehow gain back some of my calmness. ‘Do That To Me One More Time’ by Captain and Tennille played from the speakers. Life was playing sick games with me for sure. I wanted to tell him where to put his contacts but I knew way too well that I wasn’t in any position to turn down an offer like that, no matter how I wanted to brush that high and mighty look off from his face.

“What’s it gonna be?” That question brought back memories that I wanted to erase from my mind, or at least dig so deep, not even a hypnotizer would be able to find it. I chewed on my bottom lip, fought my own inner battle. For a long time ago, I had no problems with keeping my temper in check. However, in that moment, all I wanted to do was scream and stomp my feet as a child. It didn’t help at all that I could tell he also remembered the time when he used that phrase with me.

“Fine. You get the membership. Now give me the contacts,” I hissed, my eyes threw lightnings at him.

“You get the contacts when I get the membership,” he nodded clearly satisfied with blackmailing me. If he thought, I’d let him close to me again, he couldn’t be any more wrong.

“Don’t you trust me?” I snorted while cursed him mentally for being so wary towards me and not leaving me a chance to get out of this.

“Oh, I do trust you but I also know you. If there’s a loophole anywhere, you’re going to find it,” he answered, made me to roll my eyes. Damn him and his ability to think rational all the time.

“I’ll give you the membership in the evening. Be here by 9 or the deal is off,” I added, desperately tried to have the last word, and the control of the situation what was slipping away from me dangerously.

“See you then,” he grinned before he leant over me and placed a soft kiss to the corner of my lips, his hand brushed lightly over my arm, left goosebumps in it’s trail. “And red still fits you well,” he commented of the obvious flush on my face before started out. My mouth gaped, I wanted to say something smart, something that could sting but I had no come back other than a glare that I sent to his back.

“Who was this?” Chris asked. I didn’t even realize he arrived. I was so caught up in my debate with Logan that I practically forgot anyone else existed on the planet.

“No one,” I mumbled as I walked back to my office with the plan of picking my bag up, and going home to clear my mind.

“No one, hm?” Chris followed hot on my heels. I knew he wouldn’t let it go. He was my best friend after all, and I knew how I must have looked like; like one of those messy little sub girls who thought they could have a word in the big boys’ game. It was shameful I had him affect me in such way. The reaction he had on me boiled my blood. I was as angry as I hadn’t been in long years.

“Yes, no one, Chris!” I yelled at him as I picked my bag up from the desk with a quick move. I felt bad about it instantly. He was concerned about me from the day we’d met. He knew as well that something was off about me. I wasn’t surprised he wanted to know what was going on with me.

He didn’t say a word just raised an eyebrow and crossed his arms over his chest. His chocolate brown eyes were filled with patience and understanding. He always reminded me of a big caring bear with his messy brown hair and tall figure and the air of calmness that surrounded him all the time.

“I’m sorry,” I sighed, offered an apologetic look to him. The last thing I wanted to talk about was Logan. I’d burried him so deep I thought I was done with him for good, and now it felt like my wounds opened up again. I didn’t want anyone to see that, not even Chris. “I’m just exhausted, and stressed because of this whole alcohol problem. But it’s solved now so I can go home and relax a few hours.”

“You do that,” he nodded but I could hear from his voice we weren’t done with the subject. That was fine by me, I’d get myself together and wouldn’t let Logan get under my skin like that again. Everything would go back to normal and there would be no reason for anyone to ask questions.

“I’ll see you in the evening,” I forced a smile to my face as I pet a small kiss to his cheek before I started out to my car.