Chapter Twenty Two
I get home after a hard day at work, the kids were hyper than usual today...“Fuck me, am knackered”I moan as I sit down at the kitchen table.
“Language Eva”Mum growls
“Sorry ma” I say sheepishly
Mum’s doing a pot of Scouse for tea, I love mum’s Scouse, so does amber, I text her
Me: “Hey, Me Mum’s doing her Scouse x”
She replies, Amber: “Fuck yes, Pleeeeease tell me she’s got the tiger bread! X”
I look round for the bread...“Eh mum, did you get that bread that we like to dip in the scouse?” I ask her as she stirs the pot of scouse
“Course I did, you can tell Amber that too” she grins. Mum knows me and amber love our food, especially hers.
Me: “Ma’s got the bread, You down? X” I text Amber
Amber: “Fuck yeah, Be there in about 10mins, babe x” she texts back.
“Ma....” I go to say as I look up from my phone, Mum’s already got Amber’s plate out already
“How did you?—I go to say, but mum doesn’t say anything, she winks at me with a grin. Yeah, she knows what Amber’s like...
“So how was work today?” Mum asks
“Yeah good, Abbie and Kieron are going up a level in reading” I say proudly thinking of them
“Aww babe, That’s great news, am so proud of you” Mum says with a beaming smile
“Nah, I did nothing. I just gave them the push they needed, they did everything else” I say shrugging my shoulders
Just then our front door opens “What UP my adoptive family!” Amber shouts as she enters the house.
“What the fuck bitch, did you RUN here?” I tease
Amber flips me off as she sits down, mum comes over to the table where me and amber are sat at
“Eva, language" she scolds me ” Hey stranger,” Mum says hugging Amber “Where’ve you been? Haven’t seen you round here in ages” She asks.
“Aww, That’s cos she’s all Lovey Dovey with Russy-Wussy aren’t you babe?” I say in a teasing voice laughing at her
Amber scowls at me, As mum laughs “Well then, It seems you’ve caught the Lovey Wovey bug too haven’t you then Eva? Cos I haven’t seen your face either, Cos you’re in Lovey Wovey with your Juzzy Wuzzy" Mum teases back
Amber’s cackling her arse off, pointing at me “HAAAAA, Serves you right, bitch face” she whispers smugly. I flip her off, and she pulls her tongue at me.
She looks to mum as she stirs the pot of scouse “Oh ma you KNOW I love your scouse” Amber inhales the smell of the scouse boiling “Aaah, get in ma belly” She booms
Mum grins “I do, but then again, you love all my food, Don’t you?” She laughs
“That’s True” Amber grins at my mum, then comes over to sit back down at the table.
“So come on then woman, spill, What happened when you confronted Russ?” I say leaning in
Amber smiles brightly, blushing red. Oh, it’s gotta be good...
“Come on, spill girl, Don’t keep us in suspense,” Mum teases as she sits down
Amber laughs “Okay, Okay— So after I left here earlier, I went straight to Russ’s place and confronted him about the calls and texts from the women. I explained that I saw them call when I was trying to take a picture of myself for him. He said, and I quote “Woman, I fuckin love the fuck outta ya, but I swear, I don’t know if I wanna spank that arse or kiss the fuck outta your face” She mimics Russ’s voice, grinning.
“So, what did he go for?” Mum asks impatiently, not caring anymore that Amber swore, Amber snort laughs at mum’s outburst.
“God mum, what the fuck?” I laugh
“Oh please, child. Don’t pretend you weren’t wondering the same thing,” she rolls her eyes at me,
I grin at her, shrugging “That’s true, Sooooo?” I ask Amber impatiently.
Amber laughs “I don’t kiss and tell,” She says innocently looking at her nails
“Like fuck, you don’t” Me and mum shout in unison
Amber cracks up laughing her arse off “Get on you two, kinky arse fuckers” she laughs smacking the table.
“Just tell us will you?” I say exasperated
"OKAY, OKAY—geez, The fuck girl? You wearing a thong today or something? Cos you got something up that arse” Amber says shaking her head.
"ANYway, I let him do it ALL. My baby went all fuckin fifty shades on ME— I swear am still sore,” She says as she shifts in her seat.
“What did he do?” Mum says eagerly
“Ma, am not gonna go in detail—fuck. You’ve watched fifty shades haven’t ya? Use your dirty mind!” Amber winks laughing.
"AND,” I ask
"And what?” Amber asks innocently
“What the fuck else, Amber? I know there’s more” I say exasperated
“FINE!, Fuck me girl” She huffs, “He said he loved me” She adds shyly
“Awwww” Mum coos, making amber blush furiously.
“Really? Don’t you think it’s too soon?” I say in wonder
“Not when it’s true love, Eva” Mum says “And by the look on our Amber’s face. I’d say she’s head over fucking heels for the lad. Matter fact, I’d say you are for Justin,” She says seriously “But you’re scared!” She adds
“What the fuck mum? Who are you, Oprah?” I scoff trying to play off her comment, but I know she’s right.
“Girl, Don’t play that shit with me. I’ve seen the way you look at Justin. YOU are in love babe, The both of you are in love, fuck me.” She says looking like something has just occurred to her “My girls have gone and fallen in love, FUCK ME!" She says in shock but then shakes her head, grinning like the cat ate the cream. “Right help yourself, girls. Bread is in the bread bin, I won’t be a minute....” She says as she walks out the kitchen. Me and Amber frown in confusion as mum walks to the door of the stairs.
“Babe” Mum shouts up the stairs
“What’s up baby?” Dad shouts back
“Where’s my phone? Do you know?” She replies
“Have a look in your bag, baby....” Dad shouts back
“Oh yeah!” Mum says excitedly as she runs into the living room, no doubt that’s where her bag is.
Me and Amber dish everyone’s Scouse out, whilst mum is looking for her phone...
"TEA EVERYONE!!!" I shout as I walk into the hallway. Then I hear my mum trying to talk quietly on her phone in the living room.
“Barb, I shit you not, Our girls have fallen in love” Mum squeals excitedly down the phone “I know, I can’t believe it either. I mean, You know what this means don’t ya? FUCKING GRANDKIDS!!" She Squeals. Oh hell no! I haven’t even told Justin how I feel yet and my ma is already having me popping kids out!
I walk back to the kitchen where Dad, Catherine and Holly, Are all sat around the table eating their tea. Amber looks at me in confusion, I must of had a face on when I walked in, I shake my head and mouth later to her. She frowns at me again, but lets it go.
“So, baby girl, How was work today?” Dad asks
“Good dad, Abbie and Kieron have gone up a level in their reading,”
Dad, Amber and Catherine all say “Wow’s” and “That’s fab” as mum comes in with a huge grin on her face.
Dad grins as mum sits down next to him and whispers “Last time I saw that look on your face, we had mummy daddy special time" Dad growls
“Fucking hell dad, dya have to?” Catherine moans
“Language” Mum and Dad say in unison, Dad grins innocently at mum as she glares at him “I thought I was whispering quietly” He shrugs
“We heard you from over here Pop’s” Amber grimaces with a mock shudder
Dad looks sheepishly at us “Sorry,” He says looking at mum, she blushes giggling as she eats her food.
“Dad, come on, I’m trying to eat here,” Catherine moans again “Can you at least hold off on the Mr Lover–Lover time, until we’ve finished our food please?” She says dropping her voice like Shaggy does in the song boombastic
Me and Amber are laughing our arses off, as is Catherine. Dad’s frown makes Catherine laugh even more, and tells him to watch Shaggy– Boombastic and he’d know what she meant.
Finishing our tea’s, We head upstairs to my room “So what the fuck has ma been saying now?“Amber whispers as we walk upstairs.
“She was on the phone to your mum,” I say “I heard the word grandkids" I grimace
"FUCK,” Amber says
"YUP" I agree as we walk into my room shutting the door behind us…