“What are you doing Scarlet?” He whispered in my ear.
“What I want,” I said. I felt his hands and arms wrap around my body as he pulled me closer to his. Our lips staying in link with each other. He grabbed my hair and pull it down exposing my neck to him. He gently started to bite on my neck and it was driving me crazy.
“Lucas, I want you,” I whispered into his ear. He laid me down on the couch. He then climbed on top of me.
“Tell me what you want Scar.” He said to me. I knew I wanted him, but I didn’t know what to say to him. I had never done more than make out. I never allowed anything to go further than that. I knew for sure that I wanted to go all the way with him, but how do I say that without sounded like a prude? “I asked you a question, Scarlet.” He said.
“I want you.” Was all I could think to say.
“I want you too. Tell me what you want me to do?” He said. I took a deep breath as his lips brushed my neck again.
“I want you to be my first,” I said. He stopped and then he sat up and looked at me.
“Wait, your still a virgin?” He said. I started to get uncomfortable. I bit down on my bottom lip. I just nodded at him. “Scar....” He stayed quiet for a moment. “Scar, why do you want to do this with me? I mean if you waited this long, why now?” He asked me, as he sat himself back down. I sat up. I didn’t really have an answer for him.
“I don’t know. I know that you make me feel like no one else has ever made me feel. Your kisses feel like they mean something. Hell Lucas, I’m almost nineteen years old and on my way to college.” I said.
“My kisses with you do mean something Scar. I just don’t know if I’m the right choice for you. I’m going into this without thinking.” He said. God, he is changing his mind about me.
“I’m sorry Lucas. I didn’t know you would feel this way. I should have just stayed at Jessica’s.” I said.
“No, I’m glad you came home. All I’ve wanted to do since I saw you was kiss you.” He said. “But I don’t think I’m worthy of your innocents.” He said. I took a deep breath.
“It’s okay Lucas. I understand.” I said as I started to straighten myself out. “Besides this was wrong, to begin with,” I said trying to make myself not feel rejected.
“I’m sorry Scar.” Was all he said. I just stood up and went up to my room.
The next couple of days went by slowly. Lucas was gone most of the time and when I did see him, we didn’t say much to each other. I bummed Jessica out when I told her what had happened and then she asked me if Lucas was fair game. I wanted to punch her, but we were on the phone and I couldn’t get to her. Of course she was kidding, but still. I hated the fact that Lucas was basically ignoring me. I was starting to get very upset with him. Three days later he came walking in the house around midnight. I was laying on the couch watching a movie. He slammed down his fist on the counter. “Lucas? Is everything okay?” I asked him.
“Why are you still up?” He asked me.
“I wasn’t tired,” I said as I walked in the kitchen and stood beside him.
“I’m fine Scar. You should go to bed.” He said. I looked at him and seen blood on his hands and face.
“Lucas, what happened?” I said as I took his hand in mine. He just looked at me. I walked him over to the sink where I grabbed a rag and started to gently clean him up. He didn’t say anything to me. He just watched me. Lucas used to get into a lot of fights as a teenager. I was used to this, but this looked bad. “Are you okay?” I asked him. He just nodded at me and continued to watch me. I started to take his jacket off and then I started to clean his face. He had a large cut above his eye. “You might need stitches for this,” I said as I started to clean the cut. He closed his eyes and let me clean it. He then grabbed me by my wrist and pulled me closer to him.
“Why are you being so good to me?” He said.
“Why wouldn’t I be?” I asked him. “Lucas, I don’t hate you and I’m not mad at you. To be honest, you did the right thing.” I said.
“But, I didn’t want to do the right thing.” He said. I knew what he meant. I didn’t want this to stop between us either. “Scar, do you want to go for a drive with me?” He asked me. The sun was already setting outside. I nodded at him.
“Do I need anything?” I asked him.
“Just you babe.” He said. I felt the butterflies flutter in my stomach. When he called me babe. “Come on.” He said and reached out for my hand. We walked out to his truck and got in and took off. The drive was a little long as he took a left turn and we were now on a dirt road.
“Are you bringing me out here to kill me?” I asked him with a smile on my face. He just smiled and kept his eyes on the road. Yep, I’m going to die. I said to myself. He made a left turn and we were still on a dirt road. Then we came out to this clearing and I could see lightning bugs and water. He parked the truck and we were completely alone out here. I hopped out of his truck and took a look around. “Wow Lucas, it’s beautiful here. How did you know about a place like this?′ I asked him. He pulled a blanket out of the back of his truck.
“I’ve been coming here for years. I found it one night when I was just out for a drive. I’ve never seen anyone out here. I made it my like, thinking spot. I come here to get away.” He said. I smiled at him. He walked over to the water’s edge and laid the blanket out on the ground for us. I slipped out of my shoes and took a seat. Lucas just stood there for a moment and watched the water.
“What are you thinking about?” I asked him.
“You.” He said.
“Me? Why me?” I asked him.
“Come on Scar, you must have known.” He said. I just then got confused.
“I don’t know what your talking about Lucas,” I said. He looked down at me and then he took a seat next to me. He took a deep breath.
“Did you ever wonder why I was always such an ass to you?” He asked me.
“I just thought it was because you hated me,” I said, looking up at the stars.
“Well I did, sort of hate you, but I also had a huge crush on you.” He said not looking at me. My mouth fell open.
“You did not,” I said. He just nodded at me. “Lucas, you were terrible to me all the time and when I would get hurt. You never helped me. How could you have a crush on me if you felt that way?” I asked him. He just looked down.
“I had to hide my feelings somehow. I mean come on. Me falling for my father’s new wife’s daughter. Not really a smart thing to do. I made sure to go away to school, but when I got home and I saw you again for the first time after all those years. My feelings came back like a mac truck. You have changed so much.” He said. I stayed quiet for a moment.
“So how many girls have you brought up here?” I asked him trying to lighten up the mood some. He had a huge grin on his face.
“Your the only person I have ever brought here. Not even my friends know of this place.” He said.
“Lucas?” I said. He turned and looked at me.
“Yes, Scar?” He said.
“What if I told you that I could fall for you?” I said, my heart was beating out of my chest.
“What if I told you that I have already fallen.” He said. I took a deep breath.
“Kiss me,” I said. He turned and looked me in the eyes.
“If I kiss you, I might not be able to stop.“He said softly. His face was dangerously close to mine.
“I don’t want you to stop,” I said. I moved my face closer to his. His forehead came to mine. His eyes were closed. I could tell he was having a personal battle within himself. I touched his shoulder. He looked at me. “I want you to touch me like no one has ever touched me before. I want to feel your lips all over my skin. I want to know what you feel like inside of me.” I said. I felt him breathe in deeply. His lips came to mine in a much deeper way than before. He wasn’t being rough, but this was more intense. I melted into him. He laid me back on the blanket and started to unbutton my shirt. His lips made their way down my chest and back up to my neck. He looked up at me and his fingers started to caress my face.
“You’re beautiful you know that.” He said. I smiled at him. “Listen to me, tonight is not the night for us. I have to do this right. Your the one thing in my world that I want to get right. I need for you to be sure it’s me. Please don’t take this as I don’t want you Scar. Trust me this is the hardest thing I have ever had to do.” He said. I had to respect him for that.
“I don’t think my mind will change about you Lucas,” I said to him as I reached out and touched his face. He closed his eyes. ” Will you kiss me more?” I said. He smiled and his lips came back to mine. I felt something wet on my face and realized he was bleeding for the cut on his head again. “Come on Lucas I think we should take you to see the doctor,” I said. He just looked at me and smiled.
“I like how concerned you are for me.” He said. “Okay, if that’s what you want.” I just nodded at him and we both got up and headed to his truck.