20. Best birthday ever
There wasn't much to say about the night. We set up the tent, made s'mores, sat under the stars in silence. It was comfortable.
I don't need flashy parties and to be honest, I don't even like cake. This was a perfect birthday.
I was, however, surprised to find out we were all three sharing a small tent. The guys barely fit in it comfortably, but then you add our backpacks and me and... yes there was mad snuggling going on.
I woke up in the middle of the night for some water with my head on Zander's chest. Our fingers intertwined. My legs were tangled up with Jax. His arm lay over my stomach.
That same wave of guilt hit, but it was accompanied by other feelings. My skin felt like it was on fire and it wasn't the two human furnaces I was sandwiched between. I mean it was, but it wasn't. My heart felt full. I found myself wishing it could be like this always.
No matter what Zander says, I don't see it as a good thing. Jax deserves a good girl. One that can love him and only him. Sometimes I find myself thinking the same for Zander. It feels so selfish and greedy to expect these two to be ok with sharing my love. That's why I was so upset with Jaxon.
He called out all of my feelings. He brought them out into the open and it made me feel like shit. It was frustrating.
It's still frustrating.
I can't handle being this close to him, but at the same time this is all I want. Both of my guys curled up with me.
Jax moves closer in his sleep pressing his body to mine. From the feel of him he must be having a really good fucking dream. His hand slid up from my stomach to my breast gripping me tightly.
I pinched my lips together to hold back the moan threatening to escape.
His nose ran up my neck. His lips found my ear. "Mmm princess" he groaned in my ear pressing his hard bulge against my backside.
My cheeks heat in a blush.
He's dreaming of me?
Don't be silly, Lennix.
I laced my fingers with his to pull his hand off my chest. His lips found my neck as he kissed my weak spot.
"Jax" it was barely a whisper.
His hips rocked into me making me whimper.
Fuck, we can't do this.
"Jaxon" I tried to steady my voice, but it was hopeless.
"Nix" his voice was a raspy, sensual, sleepy tone.
His hand moved down my stomach resting on the thin fabric of my sleep shorts.
"Jax" I moaned softly trying to remove his hand.
He rubbed up and down my covered slit breathing deep... his breath fanned against my shoulder and neck setting my need sky high.
"I fucking crave you." His voice was deeper. More controlled.
I turned to look at him surprised to find those dark blues looking midnight in the soft moonlight coming through the window of our tent.
"Jax, we can't." I don't know who I was trying to convince, him or myself.
He grabbed my jaw with a firm hand making me face him. Kissing me roughly. Demanding entry to my mouth while he was grinding his bulge into my round ass. I found myself pushing myself back into him. Whimpering and moaning into his mouth. His thrusts picked up. I'm sure I was soaked from how much I wanted him, but as quick as it started... he pulled away cursing under his breath.
"Shit, Lennix... I'm so sorry." He quickly got up and left the tent.
What the hell?
I sat up for the next couple of hours wondering what happened and why.
He just left.
When he finally came back I was asleep.
I had to get out of there. At first I thought I was still dreaming, but holy shit my dreams never felt that good.
I had broken the rules again.
I made the move.
She tried to stop me, but in my dream like state I... I fucking lost it.
I grabbed her.
I touched her.
I forced her lips to mine.
Fuck I dry humped her like a god damn pre-teen.
What the hell is wrong with me?
Zander may actually kill me if he finds out I was forceful. I can't help my dominant nature, which is why the rule was place to wait for her to make the move. What if she blames me for this? I can't go back to her not speaking to me all because I was impulsive.
Why can't you just keep it in your fucking pants, Jaxon?!
I waited a couple of hours before I braved going back into the tent.
I crawled back to my spot behind Lennix kissed her cheek and stared at her for a few moments while she slept.
"I feel like I'm always fucking this up. I've never wanted someone like I want you. Never... loved someone as much as I love you. You deserve better than me half asleep trying to fuck you like a damn animal. I promise I'll do better, princess." I kissed her cheek again and snuggled into her to fall back to sleep.
I don't know what Jax was apologizing for, but I figured I'd keep quiet and still.
It may be shitty to listen to him talking to her while she sleeps, but let's face it, the tent is fucking tiny there's not really a way to not hear everything and that includes the little whimper and moans I heard a few hours ago.
I was too tired from the drive to pay it any mind and really, if they want to get together I'm not stopping them. Hell, it would be easier on all of us if they would just get down to it and stop playing this back and forth cat and mouse game.
But listening to him talk to her so softly, I have to admit that he's grown quite a bit.
Is it wrong to be proud of your best friend who's in love with your girlfriend when he's grown as a person and is genuinely happy with her?
Don't answer that.
I know what society would say and frankly I don't give a damn. The only thing I care about is the happiness of the two people sharing this tent with me.
Paintball, hiking, and now the waterfall!
Sunset was quickly approaching and I really wanted pictures of the view.
"Hurry it up slow pokes!" I hollered over my shoulder.
Zander and Jax may be all rippling abs and sex on legs, but when it comes to hiking... why am I up front telling them to pick up the pace?
"I like the view back here just fine, princess" Jax called out with a wink while Zander just laughed.
"Buncha dogs! Why did I come here with y'all?" I grumble to cover my own laugh.
"Because you love me?" Zander asked hopefully.
Then Jax has to ruin it, "Because were sexy?"
I threw my hands up in the air in mock surrender "I give up! Next time I hike on my own!"
I caught a glimpse of the waterfall and took off running for it.
"Awww baby don't be like that!" Zander yelled chasing after me.
It was beautiful.
"Oh my god, it's gorgeous!" I took out my phone taking pictures of the sun set and waterfall.
The guys exchanged a look I couldn't figure out.
"You know you might be able to get some really good ones of the forest up there" Zander pointed to a space next to the waterfall. There was a small cliff that jutted out over the water.
"Perfect!" I squealed in excitement and we climbed up the side. It wasn't very high, maybe 30-35 feet high.
It was breathtaking. Heaven on earth. The most beautiful thing I have ever seen. The orange and purples of the sun set that danced over the thick green scenery of the forest. I was entranced by its beauty.
At once Zander snatched my phone from my hand with a sly smile. "We wouldn't want this to get wet."
Jax wrapped his arms around me and jumped off the cliff.
The water was freezing. It knocked the air from my lungs and all I could think was, 'this asshole just threw me in the water and Zander was in on it'
"Oh you both are dead!" I shouted up at Zander before he dropped the phones and his shirt on the ledge and jumped in splashing a new wave of icy cold water back in my direction.
We stayed until darkness swallowed up our surroundings splashing and dunking each other.
It was the perfect end to the day. We have the morning tomorrow, but we will have to leave by evening to make it home with time to rest and get to work the next day.
Can I just say, best birthday ever?!
I really don't think anything could top this!